49. Painful Truth
For the first time in as long as
he could
remember, Spike slept deeply and peacefully through the night, without
the faintest trace of a nightmare. Instead, his dreams were of Buffy --
kissing her, holding her -- influenced by the reality that was her warm
arms around him, holding him through the night and infusing even his
dreams with a sense of security and strength he had all but lost.
The next day was going to be a difficult one for all of them, they
already knew. And sure enough, the first thing Buffy heard upon waking
was the sound of Willow's furious ranting downstairs, interspersed
occasionally with Xander's attempts at talking to her, which were
unfortunately shut down by more hysterical yelling.
"Guess we'd better go rescue Xander," Buffy mumbled sleepily,
reluctantly leaning up on one arm and looking down at the blonde
vampire lying on his back beside her.
He was completely unresponsive.
"Spi - ike," she sing-songed teasingly, tracing her fingertips softly
up his arm, then back again. "Wake up, Baby."
"Don't wanna," he murmured, rolling over onto his side, away from her,
but not before she saw the incredibly tempting pout that had formed on
his full, perfect lips.
*Okay. That's it. There's no way I'm resisting *that*!*
She smiled as she took his arm and pulled him back over onto his back,
amused by the little frown of protest that creased his ivory brow. She
leaned up to kiss him slowly, sensuously, taking her time, savoring the
taste of his lips, his mouth, as she eased him gently into wakefulness.
After a few moments she pulled back to see that his frown had melted
into a lazy smile of contentment.
"You wanna get up *now*?" she whispered, her mouth moving down to place
soft, light kisses along the line of his neck.
"Mmm...not yet," he whispered, a smirk crossing his lips, his eyes
still closed.
The kissing seemed to be having its desired effect, so she kept it up
for a few moments. "Now?"
"Not quite there yet, pet. Keep trying." There was no mistaking the
slightly mocking note in his voice, although it was playful and mild.
Buffy raised her head, one eyebrow raised as she regarded him for a
moment, trying to decide if he had meant those words as the challenge
they sounded like. She shrugged as a sly smile came over her face,
completely missed by the vampire, whose eyes were still closed, still
feigning extreme sleepiness.
Intended or not -- she was taking his challenge.
Slowly, Buffy slid one silky bare leg over his, the touch of her soft,
strong body awakening his desire -- and effectively pinning him to the
bed. Her hands moved to his waist, slowly sliding up and down over the
hard planes of his chest, raking her nails lightly against his skin at
random intervals, eliciting a soft moan from his lips. her kiss
silenced him, one hand rising behind his head to press him closer,
deeper into the kiss.
His hands lifted to wrap around her, urgently pulling her closer to
him, his teasing challenge forgotten. *Sod it all,* he thought. *She's
won the bloody game already!*
She pulled back from the kiss, ignoring his little whimper of protest
as she rolled over completely on top of him, catching his wrists and
pulling his hands off of her, pinning them to the bed, clasped in hers.
She smiled down into wide sapphire eyes dark with desire.
"Ready to get up *now*?"
"*God*, no!" he gasped, straining against her hands, yearning to touch
her, her soft husky voice and gently restraining touch driving him wild
with need.
Buffy grinned wickedly as she rubbed her leg slowly over his growing
erection, but did not release him to touch her, earning another moan of
mingled pleasure and agony. "Could've fooled me," she murmured.
Suddenly, they heard a loud pounding on the door. "Buffy!" Willow's
shrill, nearly hysterical voice cried. "Buffy, I need to talk to you!"
Buffy pulled back a little, releasing his hands as she looked at the
door, torn. This day held so many important things that she had to do
-- she really did not have time for this little interlude that she
wanted so desperately.
Spike startled her by using his sudden freedom to grab her arms and
pull her back down roughly on top of him, so that her parted lips
hovered inches above his. "Don't you *dare*," he growled at her, his
blue eyes smoldering with need for her.
Buffy felt a delicious little shudder go through her body at the low,
rumbling sound -- and at that moment, she could not have found the
strength to get up if she had wanted to.
For this -- she would *make* time.
"*Buffy*!" Willow went on. "This is important!"
A michievous glint in his eye, Spike met the Slayer's gaze as he called
out loudly, "She can't deal with your neediness and bloody power issues
right now, Red! She's just about to shag me senseless, so you'll just
have to wait a couple of hours -- or days..."
The look of wide-eyed horror on Buffy's face as she stared at him,
seemingly convinced that he had just lost his mind, made him laugh out
loud -- reinforcing her sudden insanity theory.
"Soundproof room, love. Remember?" he reminded her with a smirk.
Understanding began to register in her sparkling green eyes, as she
looked slowly between the door and Spike, a slow smile spreading over
her face. "Oh, no, Will, I'm sure it won't be *that* long," she said
loudly, then looked back down at Spike with a smug smirk to gauge his
reaction as she went on. "I plan on wearing him out *way* before that!"
Spike gave her an offended look, and she realized the – completely
unintentional – implications of her words. She had meant to comment
more on her own prowess than on Spike's level of stamina. After all, he
had amazed her during the last couple of weeks with his seemingly
insatiable hunger for her. Maybe it was because he was a vampire –
though she tended to doubt that was the case – but the sexy blonde
never seemed to be able to get enough of her.
But the adorably pouty, uncertain look on his face was just too much
for her to resist, and she added, "Give me seven minutes, Will!"
sticking her tongue out and winking at him as she finished, just to let
him know she was only teasing.
On a *slightly* more serious note, this whole soundproofing thing
definitely had its potential, she thought.
The sudden silence on the other side of the door made them both freeze,
holding their breath, as a terrible thought occurred to them – the door
*was* still soundproof, wasn't it? It was Spike's turn to look
horrified, his eyes widening – and flashing golden for a moment – at
the thought of Willow's having heard Buffy's last comment. Buffy nearly
wilted under the power of the glare he shot her, giving him a nervous,
sheepish little smile.
Just then, they heard Willow's voice again – approaching from a
distance – and realized with relief that the silence had meant that she
had left the door.
Unfortunately, she had come back – with Giles.
"Willow, would you just let them be?" he said irritably in a
ridiculously loud whisper just outside the door. "I highly doubt that
they would in any way appreciate your intruding right now! They are
quite exhausted from the battle, and just need their rest! You can wait
to discuss this with Buffy until she wakes up on her own!"
"It's after noon already!" Willow protested, and Buffy wondered if her
voice had always been so shrill and annoying, and she just had not
noticed because of her affection for the girl – affection she felt none
of at the moment.
"Xander told me that they were patrolling until nearly six o'clock this
morning, Willow. And besides, Buffy's decision is the right one,
there's no sense in arguing it with her. She's made up her mind. So for
the last time..."
Willow did not let him finish. "What if she's not sleeping?" she asked,
the new argument just occurring to her. "What if that evil, soulless
*thing* in there with her has killed her already?" she snapped.
And so did Buffy.
In seconds she was out of the bed, and across the room, determined to
put an end to Willow's pompous, self-righteous attitude once and for
all. Before her hand could touch the door, Spike was suddenly beside
her. He caught her wrist gently but firmly, trying to turn her around.
Furious, she yanked out of his grip and reached again for the doorknob.
She knew he only wanted to protect her from doing something she would
regret, but he was not going to stop her.
And she was not going to regret it.
"Pet," Spike spoke softly to get her attention, and something in his
tone made her turn to look at him, though flames of anger still blazed
in her green eyes. He was very glad to know that it was not directed at
him.
Her expression softened a little when she saw that he was holding up
her robe in his hand, smiling softly at her. In her rage at her
"friend's" cruel comment, directed at the man she loved, she had
forgotten her current state of undress. In another moment she would
have humiliated herself far worse than she intended to shame Willow.
She swallowed hard, unexplainably touched by the simple gesture on his
part, thinking of her dignity when she did not, as well as by the
simple honest devotion in his eyes.
She leaned forward spontaneously to give him a brief but passionate
kiss, pulling back to smile into his eyes, whispering in an
affectionate tone, "Thanks." He had given up so much for her, done so
much to protect her in so many ways – and she was not going to let
anyone put him down again.
She took the robe from his hand and shrugged into it, pulling it closed
around her and tying it tightly, while he found his jeans and pulled
them on, not wanting any more than she did to be naked in front of
Willow and Giles. Once they were both ready and he was standing at her
side, she reached for the door to open it.
"Willow, I'm telling you, you need to stop this and go back downstairs
right now..."
"Don't tell me what I need to do!"
Buffy threw the door open, and the arguing pair grew silent, staring at
her with trapped, guilty expressions. Though she was much smaller than
either of them and dressed only in her bathrobe, Buffy still managed to
strike a very intimidating figure. Her eyes were blazing with fury, and
it only took one look at her to know that she was on a mission.
Both fell silent, neither daring to say a word, as she stepped into the
doorway, nearer to Willow. Behind her, Spike stopped in the doorway,
wanting to be able to witness the confrontation to come without getting
in her way.
"Don't you *ever* talk about Spike like that again!" Buffy snapped, her
voice low and trembling with rage as she glared at the redheaded witch.
Willow's eyes widened with surprise and alarm, and she took a step
backward away from the very angry Slayer. "But – but Buffy – I was just
– worried about you..."
"No, you just found out about England, and you wanted to gripe me out
about it and tell me why you think it's a bad idea," Buffy stated
flatly, sparks still shooting from her glimmering emerald eyes. "And as
for that 'soulless killer'," she went on furiously, indicating Spike in
the doorway, "he saved *all* our lives last night! If Faith had
succeeded, don't you think for a minute that any of us would have
survived! And Spike stopped her, for good. Even though he could have
been killed. Even though he nearly was."
She paused, and Spike dropped his gaze, his expression flat and
emotionless, not wanting to betray anything or cause any distraction
from Buffy's words.
"You owe your life to him, Willow. So don't you dare talk about him
like he's somehow *less* than you! Like you are something so special,
and he's the dirt beneath your feet!" Buffy's voice was filled with
disgust as she stepped closer to the wide-eyed frightened redhead,
backing her up against the wall.
"You know who almost killed me last night, Will?" she asked softly with
a cold smile. "I'll give you a hint. It wasn't *Spike*!"
Willow's eyes dropped to the floor as her back hit the wall. "Angel..."
she whispered, regret in her voice. She knew that Angel's actions would
not have been possible if not for her own.
"Wrong," Buffy responded, almost before the word left her lips, right
in her face and meeting her eyes as she said softly, "*You* did,
Willow. Because you couldn't stand the fact that Spike was the one
helping me, and you were sitting here at home stripped of your powers.
You wanted to feel like a big hero – so you let the vampire who killed
my mother free to try to kill me too – and he almost did."
She was silent for a long moment, just staring at her friend in anger –
and sorrow. Willow's downcast eyes welled with tears. Both Giles and
Spike just stood there in silence, their eyes respectfully averted from
the intensely personal scene playing out before them, though neither
wanted to leave it completely. It did not matter.
Both Buffy and Willow had forgotten, for the moment, that anyone else
was even in the house.
Willow finally began to speak in a hesitant whisper, "I – I'm s..."
"Don't," Buffy cut her off harshly. "Don't bother, Willow. You still
think you did nothing wrong in all this."
Willow flinched, hurt by the harsh words, however true they might be,
and Buffy felt a sad little pang in spite of herself. Willow *had* been
her best friend for a very long time.
When she spoke again, her voice was softer, as she stated simply, "You
need help, Willow. You need to get control of the magic, instead of
letting it control you."
Willow looked up at her, her face tear-streaked and ashamed, but still
somewhat defiant at those words. "You can't make me go, Buffy," she
stated in a quiet, stubborn voice.
"To England -- no," Buffy conceded, her eyes serious. "Out of my house
-- yes."
Willow's eyes grew shocked as Buffy went on quietly, "You don't have to
go with Giles to England. But if you don't, I know that you don't
really want to change. And you're a danger to those I love -- including
yourself. You won't be welcome here."
The lost, disbelieving look in Willow's eyes hurt Buffy to see it --
but she knew that she was right -- and she knew immediately that
Willow's decision would be to go to England, rather than to lost her
closest friends. Maybe there, she could learn that she didn't have to
be all-powerful to feel safe, and that it was not her right to decide
what was best for everyone around her.
Buffy turned back toward the bedroom, leaving the witch and the Watcher
sobered by her words. At the door, she turned back toward them,
slipping her arm around Spike's waist in an unmistakably intimate way.
"And by the way," she added softly, in more control now, a slight smile
playing about her lips. "Spike and I are together now," she stated
plainly. "And anyone in this house who has any problem with that --
needs to get over it. Or get out."
And with that said, she turned around and led her lover back into their
room -- closing the door behind them with a very distinct click that
echoed in the silence of the hallway.