White Magic

When Spike left the room, Tara immediately went to the door, her hand on the handle, ready to follow him. Her heart hurt with the anguish of betrayal and abandonment she had heard in his voice, and she wanted nothing more than to find Spike, take him in her arms, reassure him that no matter what he went through, she would be there with him for every step, every challenge.

She wanted to... but she didn't.

Although the conversation had not gone at all as she had planned, Tara had to admit that the end result might be a good one. Spike had chosen of his own volition to walk away from her, to make the decision to stand on his own... which was what she had wanted him to do in the first place.

She just had not expected it to hurt so much when he did.

She walked out of the room and hesitated at the top of the stairs. She was almost certain that Spike had gone into the bedroom they had been sharing, and wanted to give him the space he needed; so she went downstairs to finish planning with the others.

A couple of hours later, when all were getting ready to settle down for the night, Tara made her way back up the stairs and quietly into the bedroom, knowing that as awkward as it might be, there was no other option. She and Spike had to quite literally *sleep* together in order for the dream bonding spell to work, and protect him from Buffy's invasions into his dreams.

He was lying on the bed, his back to her, and he did not stir when she walked in... but she knew he was awake.

Without a word, she slowly lay down on the bed on her side, her troubled grey eyes staring at the back of his head for a moment before she reached a cautious hand out to rest on his arm. They were both well aware that in order for the protective mind-melding spell to work, they had to be in some form of physical contact, so Spike did not pull away from her... but he did tense, flinching slightly at the warm touch of her hand.

And when he did... Tara flinched, too.

She was quiet for a long moment, as a thick ache began to build in her throat. Finally she whispered in a voice hoarse with emotion, "I do love you, Spike. So much. I do."

Spike did not respond, did not turn or look at her at all, but Tara felt the slight tremor of his arm under her hand, and knew that her words had affected him- she was just not sure how. Spike remained silent and still, only tolerating her touch, and Tara quietly maintained that simple contact, her heart breaking with the knowledge that at the moment, he did not want it.

**************************************

He fought off a sense of rising panic at the thought that he might have lost her completely already, wondering frantically, not for the first time, if it was too late to undo the damage his need and vulnerability had caused. Obviously Tara had tired of him, and the only way he could possibly repair their relationship was to give her the distance she needed.

So, he just lay there, perfectly still, afraid to turn toward her and reveal the tears in his eyes, the vulnerability he was feeling, trying to appear as if he was indifferent to her tender, affectionate touch.

All he really wanted was to turn into her arms and hold onto her as if he would never let go.

*************************************

There was only one problem with that decision - and that was the long, stressful day of waiting that stretched before them.

A few of them were busy enough throughout the day that the waiting was not an issue for them. Wesley, Anya and Fred were occupied with gathering the necessary supplies for the spell, and other preparations to ensure that the ritual went off without a problem. Angel just generally hovered, checking and double-checking various things, in what mostly seemed to be just an attempt at keeping himself busy.

Spike and Tara tried their best to avoid each other - and Dawn did her best to figure out why.

"Spike," she whispered, drawing the increasingly nervous vampire aside. "What is up with you two?"

"What do you mean, Bit?" He carefully avoided her eyes. "Nothing's up. Everything's fine..."

"Right. That's why you won't even look at Tara, right? Or me, for that matter," Dawn countered dubiously. Suddenly her eyes went wide with childish dismay. "Did you guys have a fight? You didn't, did you?"

"Course not," Spike assured her, shaking his head, keeping his gaze averted as he tried to slip past her.

But Dawn moved into his path again, blocking his escape, her jaw dropping in a stunned expression. "You did, didn't you? Oh my gosh. You guys actually had a *fight*?" Her voice rose on the last statement, high and anxious.

"Keep it down, Bit, will you?" Spike hushed her, reaching out a hand to touch her arm as he glanced anxiously around to see if anyone had overheard her, before finally looking her in the eye, his gaze troubled and pleading. "Just don't say anythin', all right? It's nobody's business but our own, and... and it wasn't really a fight, anyway. Just... just can't expect the girl to... I mean..."

He turned his head away abruptly, laughing silently at his own tears even as he reached a hand up to brush them away.

Dawn's brow creased in a frown of concern. "Spike... are you okay?"

"Just... give me a minute, Bit," Spike mumbled, edging past her and hurrying away, up the stairs, before he could unintentionally reveal any more of his unwilling emotional reaction.

With a frustrated, worried sigh, Dawn watched him go up the stairs before turning around again, scanning the room for Tara.

"More than one way..."

*********************************

The girl had a moment's indecision, as she tried to figure out whose side she should take, while not knowing what had actually happened between the two of them. Finally, she decided that sides didn't really matter; what mattered was which of them really *needed* her more at the moment, and that was certainly Spike, especially now that, for whatever reason, Tara was no longer at his side.

She crossed the room and silently sat down beside the nervous blond vampire, stubbornly not looking at him for a long moment. He glanced uncertainly up at her through fearful blue eyes, increasingly troubled as the moment to put Angel's plan into place drew nearer. He was well aware that Dawn was irritated with him, and not quite sure what to expect from her at the moment.

"I'm still mad," she assured him bluntly, without looking at him, even as she reached out her hand and clasped it firmly around his. "Just so you know."

Her petulant display of affection, both mature and childlike at the same time, drew a smile to Spike's lips in spite of the many reasons for worry he had at the moment. He gratefully squeezed her hand, glancing unconsciously across the room to where Tara sat next to Lorne, waiting for Angel to begin going over the plan for the final time.

Just as Tara felt his eyes upon her and turned her head, Spike looked away, swallowing back the sick feeling of rising panic in his throat. Though Dawn's comfort was a welcome help to him, without Tara at his side, his terror and uncertainty began to overwhelm him, suffocating him until he felt that he couldn't breathe, couldn't think, couldn't even begin to focus on what Angel was saying.

"Okay," the dark vampire began, rising to his feet and leaning against the reception desk with his hands in his pockets, his casual demeanor belying the solemn, anxious expression on his face. "I think we're about ready. We've got less than an hour before dark. So let's just go over the whole thing one more time. Wes?" He turned toward the former Watcher. "Everything ready in your department?"

Wesley nodded. "We've prepared the ritual circle in the lobby. All that's left is for Willow to perform the glamour to disguise it when Buffy comes in. All the supplies are in place as well, near the circle so that I'll have easy access to them when the time comes."

"Right," Angel nodded once in satisfaction, his eyes locked with Wesley's as he added calmly, "And the knife?"

"The knife is with the other supplies," Wesley assured him.

"Good. So... when Buffy first comes in, the sanctuary spell will still be in place. We'll leave it there until just before we need to draw her blood for the bond-breaking spell." He turned toward Lorne. "And you're absolutely sure all I need to break the sanctuary spell is this single word?"

"Positive, sugar," Lorne replied. "Just one word. You've just gotta be the one to say it, being the owner of the place and all."

Angel's brow creased slightly and he sighed. "Just seems... awfully easy."

"It makes sense when you think about it." Anya shrugged. "Think of the sanctuary spell like a lock... and the word is the key. It's a little bit more complicated to install the lock than it is to insert the key and turn it, you know?"

"If you say so," Angel muttered, his nerves beginning to show in his terse tone. "So when the moment is right, I'll break the sanctuary spell, Wes will draw her blood and complete the spell to break her bond over Spike... and then, the rest is up to you, Willow. Can you handle it?"

The little redhead swallowed hard, her face pale and her hands trembling in her lap. "I think so. I mean... yes," she stammered. "I can do it."

"We can't have any mistakes." Several of the group, including Willow, looked up, startled, at the sharp tone of Tara's voice. "This plan depends on split-second timing, Will. We have to know, *now*, if there's going to be any problem."

As she finished speaking, Tara's gaze unintentionally fell on Spike, and their eyes locked for a brief moment before he looked away - but it was long enough for Tara to see the helpless panic rising in his expression. She wanted to cross the room to his side, but was afraid that doing so might make things worse, only serving to draw more attention to Spike's vulnerability, and the need for her he was trying so hard to overcome.

Besides... he has asked her to stay away.

And she would never force her affections on him... never... .no matter how badly he seemed to need them.

"It's a simple spell. It takes two seconds and words alone," Willow shot back, resentment clear in her trembling voice as she glared defensively back at her former lover. "I can do it."

"*Will* you?" Dawn demanded, one eyebrow raised in suspicion.

"Of course I will! What's that supposed to mean?" Willow's voice was incredulous, offended. "Buffy's dangerous. I've seen that, okay? I want to help stop her."

"Look, it doesn't do any good to fight amongst ourselves," Angel broke in, a note of authority to his voice. "We have to be together on this. Tara's right; this plan *is* carefully timed down to the second. We just need to know... Willow, are you prepared to act when you're supposed to? Prepared in *every* way?"

"Yes," Willow declared without hesitation, sounding much more sure than she had sounded a few seconds before. "I'm ready. I'm prepared."

"Good." Angel glanced around the room at the others, his gaze finally coming to rest on Spike, as he tried to catch his childe's gaze to offer some form of reassurance. "And from there we should be home free. At least... at least we'll have her under control," he amended with a little grimace. "We can take it from there, as far as finding out what's wrong with her, if we can help her, all that."

"Does Spike... I mean... do we..." Dawn hesitated, before finally asking in a slightly timid voice, "Does everybody have to be right here the whole time? I mean... wouldn't it be safer if..."

"Everybody should be here," Angel stated with an apologetic shrug. "If Buffy comes in and sees that you and Tara and Spike... or even just Spike, whatever... aren't around, she'll get suspicious. I mean, as long as the sanctuary spell's in place, you're safe, right? So... why would we need to hide you guys? I think it's more natural if we're all here. I want you and Spike especially to keep your distance from her, especially once I break the sanctuary spell; but it should only be a matter of a few seconds between then, and when we have her under control."

Dawn nodded, her lips pressed together in a tight, unhappy line, but grudgingly accepting of Angel's reasoning.

"Gunn, I'll need you to be close once Wes strikes. She'll naturally start fighting then. Those next thirty seconds or so, while Wes is finishing the spell, will be crucial," Angel explained. "You and I will have to keep her busy, keep her contained, until Willow can do her spell."

Gunn nodded his approval of that idea.

"What about me?" Xander spoke up uncertainly. "What do you want *me* to do?"

Angel cast him a suspicious glance as he muttered, "Just try to stay out of the way."

Xander's nervousness showed in his lack of response to Angel's mildly antagonistic words. The boy just nodded his acceptance, as Angel drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Okay. Any questions?"

No one said a word; a heavy silence with the weight of impending disaster filled the room.

"Okay. Guess we're ready," Angel observed. "Time to make a phone call."

He picked up the telephone behind the reception desk, as Willow rose and handed him a business card with the address and phone number of the hotel where Buffy was staying. He dialed the number and the handwritten extension of Buffy's room, then waited quietly for a few moments.

"Hey, Buffy. It's me... Yeah, I know... Um... Listen, we need to talk, okay?... Well, I know, that's what you've said from the beginning... but Dawn and Tara and Spike, they're all saying... I know... I know, Buffy... that's why we need to talk this out. Just all of us sit down, no violence, no shouting, just talk this out and figure out what's going on here. Okay?... Okay."

Angel gave the others a thumbs-up sign, though his expression was grim. "Can you come here? Just for safety's sake, Buffy... No, I trust you, it's just... I'm not the only one whose feelings have to be considered here, Buffy. We can talk about all this when you get here... One hour? How does that sound?... Okay. See you then."

Angel hung up the phone with a grim smile.

"It's done. She's on her way."

******************************************

Angel's invitation was better than anything she could have hoped for.

She had planned to pay a visit to the Hyperion tonight anyway, but this was so much better. They were expecting her to be there; therefore, her arrival would not arouse any suspicions. They all still believed their precious sanctuary spell to be in place, protecting them from any harm at her hands, and therefore would be off their guard, expecting nothing to take place during the encounter beyond mere conversation.

Buffy glanced around at the circle in which she sat, cross-legged on the floor. Candles which had been burning minutes before were now dark, wisps of smoke rising from their extinguished wicks. Tracks of blood were dried on her arms where she had cut her own flesh for the ritual, but Buffy did not mind.

The spell to break the sanctuary spell had gone very well.

Her smile widened as she imagined the expression on Spike's face when she walked through that door, and showed him just how powerless she was *not*... not anymore.

*See you soon, Baby,* she thought with a wicked smirk. *Boy, are *you* in for a surprise!*