Buffy swept around in her tracks and straight through Spike's open crypt door, in one smooth, fluid motion. Her eager hands found his hips as her mouth fell on his in a hungry, consuming kiss.

Spike could do nothing but respond to her, wrapping his arms around her body and pulling her close to him, drinking in her nearness and affection like the love-starved creature that he was. His fears, his uncertainties, melted away in the heat of her embrace, the familiar, enticing taste of her kiss, until he could not remember why he had felt the need to keep her out in the first place.

Somehow they made it down the ladder to his bedroom, without ever totally losing physical contact with each other. Her hands were greedily exploring his body, as if for the first time - re-memorizing it, after their brief, and yet somehow interminable, separation. The feeling of her heated touch on his cool, needy skin was enough to drive him wild with his need for her, driving out all other thoughts form his mind but her, and what she was doing to him in that moment.

"I missed you so much!" she gasped out against his throat, between feverishly paced, desperate kisses. "God, Spike - I never want to be apart again! Please - don't ever shut me out..."

"I won't," he whispered breathlessly, fervently, his eyes closed, as she pushed him down on the bed under her. "Won't ever, Buffy...I'm so sorry..."

He felt a momentary twinge of uncertainty, when she closed her hands around his wrists, drawing them up to meet over his head. "Buffy..." he breathed out, meeting her eyes with just the barest flash of fear, "...please..."

"Shhh," she soothed him with a reassuring smile, for once devoid of any secret menace, as she released his wrists, once she had positioned them where she wanted them. "Just trust me, Sweetheart - just be still...and let me show you how much I love you."

As her expert hands and mouth slowly worked over his willing, needy body, Spike obediently kept his hands where she had placed them, relieved and infinitely grateful that for tonight, the Slayer had chosen to pass on the usual chains that had become such a common part of their frequent interludes.

And within moments, her touch had set a quiver of need and desire through his entire being, shaking and breaking apart his apprehensive thoughts, until they were nothing more than random words that made no sense, echoing weakly through his mind. For a few brief instants he tried to gather his thoughts again - vaguely aware that there was something he should not be forgetting - something he had to remember...

But then, Buffy's mouth found the aching evidence of his need for her - and the capacity for thought left him, and Spike stopped trying to remember what it was that he had been thinking.

In that moment, there was nothing but *her* -- and she was all that he wanted.

******************************************

That evening was the best that they had spent since they had started seeing each other, as far as Spike was concerned. He had never once had Buffy be so sweet, so tender with him, so attentive to *his* needs and desires. When he attempted to return the favor, to cherish her body with his own hands, she would not even allow it, pushing his hands gently back down to the mattress and shaking her head with a soft smile.

"No," she insisted softly. "Just let me touch *you*, Spike...this night is all about you."

His throat felt thick and constricted, as his eyes had welled with tears, at the tender sentiment. Relief had overwhelmed him, combined with a sense of joy like nothing he had ever felt with Buffy before, to think how much she cared for him, that she was willing to focus so completely on him and his pleasure - and he had yielded to her willingly, allowing her to do whatever she wanted to his body...which, for tonight, seemed to be whatever *he* wanted.

It never once occurred to him to think of the behavior as just another sign of her desire for control.

He wore no physical chains - but he was still bound to her will.

Several hours later, the two of them lay tangled in the smooth, clean sheets of his bed, still and sated and utterly exhausted. Buffy was resting her head on his chest, occasionally lifting it slightly to place a tender kiss against his cool, sweat-dampened skin.

"I'm so glad you forgave me, Baby," she murmured softly, as she laid her head back down, smiling as he raised cautious fingers to play gently through the ends of her golden hair. "Mmm...that feels good..." As he responded to her encouragement by increasing the pressure of his touch, drawing his fingers through the golden strands from her scalp to the ends, Buffy added sleepily, "...I don't know what I'd do without you, Spike...I love you so much..."

"I love you too, Buffy...you know I do," he whispered in a voice thick with emotion, barely able to get the words out for his choking tears of disbelieving joy.

A moment of silence passed between them, before Buffy raised her head, tilting it slightly as a puzzled frown creased her brow. She looked at him with mild curiosity as she asked, "Are these new sheets?" looking back down as she ran her fingers along the soft, luxurious black fabric.

*Bugger. *Tara*!*

Spike's eyes widened slightly in a trapped expression - thankfully, while she was looking down at the bed - as he suddenly remembered that Tara was planning on coming by the crypt when she got off work that evening. He glanced at the clock beside his bed, and noted that it was 8:45.

Tara would not arrive any later than 9:15.

"Yeah, pet," he barely remembered to reply to the Slayer's question, keeping his voice calm and casual. "Just - felt like a change."

"I like them," Buffy remarked with a suggestive smile as she looked back up at him. "Very sexy..."

He could tell by the look in her eyes that she was ready to go again - and if they did, he knew that Tara would likely arrive before they were finished.

His jealous, possessive lover would become aware of his developing friendship with the blonde witch - and Tara would become aware that he had broken his promise to her, not to allow Buffy back into his crypt.

And if that happened - he would be dust.

The only question was, at the hand of which woman?

He forced a slight smirk to his lips as he met her eyes with his own narrowed lazily. "Just like you, love," he agreed with a slight nod. He ran his fingers through her hair again as he laid his head back on the dark pillows, closing his eyes and sighing wearily, "Sexy enough to make me wish I had just a bit *more* vampire stamina, yeah? But I've got to say, love - you've bloody well worn me out tonight."

He spoke the words casually - as if he had not noticed that she was about to attempt to entice him to more - and his ruse seemed to work. Although his eyes were closed, he could almost visualize the pretty pout that would be on her lips about then, just before she sighed in resignation.

But then, he felt her body rising up over him, her hands resting on his shoulders, and he opened his eyes to meet hers, struggling to keep the rising panic he felt from showing in them.

There was no way to reach Tara before she got here.

If he couldn't get Buffy out of here in the next twenty minutes...

"Oh, well," Buffy shrugged, giving him a glimpse of her trademark pout, her eyes sparkling with warmth and affection as she leaned down to give him a slow, thorough kiss. "Guess I'll just have to wait."

And with those words, she pulled back, standing up off the bed reluctantly and beginning to look for her clothes.

"I told Dawn I'd try to come home early tonight from patrolling anyway," Buffy went on, her back turned to him. "So I guess I ought to go home and spend some time with her. The poor kid hardly sees me anymore these days."

Spike let out a silent sigh of relief behind her back, then put on an understanding smile as she turned to face him. "Guess *she* hasn't minded these past few days, then, has she, love?" he remarked thoughtfully.

"No," Buffy agreed, shaking her head. "I guess - I guess I need to spend a little more time at home..."

Spike nodded encouragingly, his mind racing with the implications of her words. "Yeah - the Niblet needs you, love. Don't wanna neglect her."

He was grateful and relieved that things had worked out so well between them - but that did not mean that he wanted to give up the brand new friendship he had just made.

It might not be such a bad idea for Buffy to spend more time with Dawn, if it would mean allowing him some time to spend with Tara on occasion. He already had decided that there was no way he could allow either woman to become aware that the other had a place in his life - and Buffy's keeping a *little* more distance might just serve to help that plan along.

By the time Tara arrive fifteen minutes later, Buffy had been gone for about ten - and Spike had just managed to make up the bed and get himself cleaned up and dressed. He hastily lit a few candles, hoping to dispel any lingering scent that might remain from his and the Slayer's coupling - grateful that Tara did not have the benefit of the acute sense of smell that he had.

Finally, he made his way up the ladder, deciding that just in case, he would attempt to keep their visit upstairs tonight - just as he heard the soft knock on his crypt door that heralded Tara's arrival.

She didn't suspect a thing. In fact, she seemed very pleased and relieved to find him in such good spirits.

It actually made him feel a little bit guilty.

But he did not feel guilty enough to tell her the truth about how he had spent his evening. Tara was a friend - and quickly becoming his *closest* friend - but after her vehement words against the Slayer and the way she had treated him in the past, Spike knew that there was no way that she would approve of his taking Buffy back, no matter how hard he tried to explain it.

He had seen the tears on the Slayer's face - experienced the rare tenderness she had lavished on him this night -- *knew* that she meant her words, that she genuinely wanted to change. Tara had not seen any of that, however; all she had seen were the terrible injuries that Buffy had inflicted on his body the last time they had been together.

There was no way that Tara would ever understand.

And for the next few weeks, his efforts to keep it from her succeeded - as did his efforts to keep his friendship with Tara from Buffy's knowledge.

Buffy's work schedule kept her busy during the days, and her new determination to spend time with her little sister kept her busy during the evenings as well. She would usually see him when she had finished patrolling, late at night, after Dawn had gone to bed.
Sometimes, he would patrol with her.

Tara had classes during the morning, but usually came to see him during the afternoons, when she knew that the sunlight would keep him crypt-bound, and he would be likely to be bored and lonely. Because of her early class schedule, she didn't usually like to be out late, so she would be long gone by the time Buffy came out to patrol.

The only difficult times so far had been weekends, when Tara had much more free time to spend - but so far, Spike had managed to balance the two relationships fairly well, with neither girl getting a hint as to the other's presence in his life.

Buffy had kept to her word to try to change things between them, and had not once struck out at him in anger. She *had* re-initiated the use of the shackles on his bedposts - once he had hesitantly agreed to it - but she had not once taken advantage of his vulnerability during those times.

If he had asked her to stop - he knew that she would have stopped.

But he hadn't felt the need to ask her to stop.

Things seemed to be going very well between them, and Spike began to consider the idea of letting the secret out - at least to Tara. With nearly three full weeks having passed without Buffy leaving a single mark on him, perhaps she would see the evidence that the Slayer had really changed, and not be *too* angry at him for letting her back in...or for keeping the secret for so long...

Well...perhaps that was a bit much to hope for...

But he knew that Tara cared about him, and even if she was initially angry, she would get over it and accept it. He was beginning to think he could make her understand.

Buffy, on the other hand - he was not so sure about.

He wanted to tell her about his friendship with Tara - but that might mean explaining the circumstances under which it had formed. And he was still not sure how Buffy might react to the fact that someone else knew about the negative history between them - or to the fact that someone else knew about them *at all*.

Still - he was beginning to wonder if she might not take it so badly after all.

She hadn't hit him in weeks, and she seemed genuinely repentant for the times when she had in the past. And, if she was genuinely sorry and determined to change - surely she would not lash out at him when he finally told her the truth...would she?

There was still a bit of uncertainty in Spike's heart as to that question, try as he might to quell his secret, lingering fears.

And exactly three weeks after he had invited Buffy back in - before he could tell either secret to either girl - those secret fears became reality once more.