I am ready
to be born
into sunlight
a bloody birth
of light pulling
fire from its heart
a birth as wet
and deep
as a midnight ocean
a birth as hard as living

They wouldn't let him into the delivery room with her. Said he appeared to be ill and they were afraid he'd pass something onto the baby. He argued with them, but it was futile and he almost morphed into his demon face and then thought better of it. It would only make things worse for her.

"Tell her I'm just outside. Right? If she needs me..."

For ten hours, he paced the floor anxiously waiting for some news. He finally threw himself down on a chair in the waiting room and tried to sleep. It was impossible.
 

* * * * *
 

She'd never felt such pain. Her hands gripped the metal bars of the bed which slowly bent beneath her strength. The nurses stood in shock as she twisted the bars like butter beneath her hands. She screamed and her anguished voice reached Spike as he sat numb and lost in the hospital waiting room. He jumped to his feet at the sound of her voice and followed her screams to their source. He swung open the door to the delivery room and was stunned at the sight before him. She'd destroyed the bed railings and was crouching on the floor. Two nurses were huddled in a corner of the room, conferring worriedly with each other.

"Make it stop!" she screamed.

He rushed to her side, picked her off the floor and tried to place her back onto the bed. She struggled against his grasp.

"Oh please, Spike! Make it stop!"

He cradled her in his arms. He tried to soothe her, calm her down. He gave the nurses a pleading look.

"What's wrong?" he cried.

"We're not sure. We've called the doctor. He should be here soon."

"Can't you give her something for the pain?"

"No, no, we have to wait.  It might hurt the baby. You have to leave now. You shouldn't be in here with her."

The nurse avoided his eyes.

"I'm not going anywhere," he shouted.

"I must ask you to leave. If you don't, I'll have to call security."

One of the nurses reached for the phone and started to dial.

"Spike," Buffy moaned, "Spike get me out of here. They're trying to kill me. I know it. Kill me and our baby. Oh god... please!"

She let out another heartrending scream.

He overheard the nurse speaking to the security guard over the phone and made a quick decision.

He bundled her in a blanket, swept her up in his arms and ran out of the delivery room. He heard the nurses shouting behind him.

"I knew you'd come," Buffy mumbled. "You'd save us."

Spike turned down a side corridor, descended some stairs and found his way into the basement of the hospital. He knew the way out from there...he'd snuck into the hospital several times to raid the blood bank in his wilder, pre-Buffy days. He found the small room which had an outlet down into the sewers and tunnels beneath the city.

Their progress through the tunnels was slow because every few minutes they'd have to pause while Buffy had a contraction. She was not quite coherent at this point. But oddly enough, she's stopped screaming about 'the pain'. When the contractions began, she'd pull on Spike's jacket and he'd stop and let her get into a comfortable position to ride them out.

"Soon," she said hoarsely.

"Soon, what?" he asked fearfully.

"It's coming."

Spike paused at a junction in the tunnel. If he went left, he could get to Revello Drive, but it was still about fifteen minutes away. If he went right, he could get her to the little cave that he'd camped in so many months before.

He turned right.

Surprisingly, the cave had not been disturbed since he'd left it that day to find Buffy. He hadn't been back since then. After he set her down on the edge of the sleeping platform, he gathered up the piles of blankets, took them out into the main part of the tunnel and gave them a good shake. He made up a bed for her, placing the sheet she was wrapped in on top of the old blankets and covering her with the blanket from the hospital. He found and lit several candles.

It appeared that her labor had paused.

She asked for water and he scooped some water from the small pool in the corner of the cave and let her drink from his hands.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Demon Nurses," she replied. "Tried to kill me. Tied me down."

She held up her wrists and showed him the dark red welts on her wrists which he hadn't noticed before in his anxiety for her safety.

"I need to get you back home, love," he said. "Can't have the baby here."

He gazed around the cave and thought to himself that it might not be a bad idea for her to have the baby here. The cave was warm and easily protected, unlike the house at Revello Drive. If someone were indeed after her or the child, then this little cave was probably the safest place they could be. Only he worried if there might be complications. And what did he know about birth? Not much. Not a single thing, in fact. All he knew about was death.

He knelt beside her as her labor began again in earnest.

"I don't know what to do."

He stroked her damp hair away from her face.

Another half hour passed and nothing seemed to be happening.

"Buffy...I shouldn't have brought you here...what was I thinking?" he whispered.

She opened her eyes and squeezed his hand.

"I'm afraid."

"Me too, love. Let me take you back."

"No..." she moaned.

"What is it? Why isn't the baby coming?"

"I'm afraid," she said again.

"What are you afraid of, love? Pain? You can take it. You're the Slayer. My strong, brave Slayer."

He leant over and pressed his lips against her forehead.

"Don't be afraid."

"The world. So terrible. So evil. Sadness. I can't protect..." She grimaced as another contraction swept through her body.

"It's too late now. You can't go back. You just have to move forward love. Let her be born. Let her free."

Buffy gave a small cry and tried to change positions. He helped her to find the exact position that her body naturally sought in order to bring forth the small being inside of her.

"Let her be free. Not your choice anymore. Let her have her life."

And with a great cry, Buffy finally delivered her daughter into the loving hands of a vampire.

At the moment of birth, as Spike held the small being in his hands, he felt a profound sense of completion as if his whole existence culminated in this single point of time. He felt an intense wave of energy pass between him and his daughter. And as he looked at her in the flickering candlelight, she opened her eyes and he swore that she gave him a little smile.

"Welcome, little love," he said softly.
 

* * * * *
 

Several hours later, mother and daughter were cleaned up and snuggled warmly together and reveling in the sweet symbiosis of nourishment and love.

Spike built a small fire just outside the entrance of the cave where he burned all traces of the birth. He made Buffy some tea and, with a rapt gaze, sat on the edge of the bed and observed his daughter drinking greedily from her mother's breast.

"A bleeding miracle. I never knew."

He picked up his daughter's small hand and stroked the tiny fingers.

"Absolutely perfect. Like her mum."

"What shall we name her, Spike?"

He searched through a pile of dusty books next to the bed and found the one he wanted.

He opened it and began to read aloud:

                  CIX.

O, never say that I was false of heart,
Though absence seem'd my flame to qualify.
As easy might I from myself depart
As from my soul, which in thy breast doth lie:
That is my home of love: if I have ranged,
Like him that travels I return again,
Just to the time, not with the time exchanged,
So that myself bring water for my stain.
Never believe, though in my nature reign'd
All frailties that besiege all kinds of blood,
That it could so preposterously be stain'd,
To leave for nothing all thy sum of good;
For nothing this wide universe I call,
Save thou, my rose; in it thou art my all

He closed the book.

"My little rose," he said. "I'd like to name her Rose. William would understand."