100617.3635@compuserve.com (Warren Ellis) wrote:

>Well, with all the nice things people have been saying about the book
>lately, I almost hate to post this, but...

>I quit EXCALIBUR earlier today.


I hope no one minds me writing this little story. It's to Warren
Ellis, from Excalibur. 

Disclaimer:
This story features the X-Men and other related characters, which are
copyrighted by Marvel Entertainment/Marvel Comics Group and are used
without permission. The use of these characters in this story is not
intended to infringe on that copyright. No profit is being made on
this work, it's written solely for entertainment purposes. This work
is copyright of me and may not be used for commercial purposes.

**********************************************************

The members of Excalibur are assembled for a crisis meeting. They all
look grey and pale, like old newsprint. Bad allegory? Just go on
reading below. There will be worse. 

<Peter Wisdom sits with his head in his hands. Kitty is trying to
comfort him. The rest stare blankly at nothing>.

Kitty: Pete? Pete? Say something. You can't just sit there!

Kurt: It's hard on us all, Katzchen. To think this would happen as
soon as I began to develop leadership skills. I really think I could
be more than a fuzzy elf. Now..I don't know. <He sighs. His tail is
drooping.>

Moira<absently but warmly>: Aye, but ye are a  fuzzy elf. The best one
in the world. Though I wonder who will write my death-scene now. I'd
hate to get it all mucked up. <She frowns, reaches for her glass of
70%, then thinks better of it.>

Kitty <close to tears now>: Pete? Do you want..a cigarette? Stop
pounding at the wall, Peter, it isn't doing any good! <She puts her
hand over her mouth, bites her knuckles, then says more calmly:> No,
I'm sorry I snapped at you.

Piotr: It's all right.
<He doesn't look like it is.>

Meggan: He gave me some self-confidence! I've never had that before! I
really want to be like Sigourney Weaver!

Brian <bitterly>: I guess this was the last chance to get my sister
home to England.

Kurt: It's worst for Pete, though. I think he really identified with
herr Ellis.

Kitty: Yes, Lockheed even brought back Pete's cigarettes. All wet and
chewed up, of course, right, Lockheed? <She pats the dragon who
responds by sending out a huge puff of smoke>

Lockheed: Pffft.

Brian <even more bitterly>: Does anyone of you realise what it means
not to have been written like a jerk?

Meggan: Or a bimbo?

Rahne <hesitantly>: Well, he did say I was "the aptly named
Wolfsbane". That wasn't very nice of him, I'd say.

Brian: That wasn't him, you idiot! Get me some whiskey.

Meggan <aggressively>: I think not.

Brian: Let's see how long you'll be able to keep that attitude.
Another writer will send you back to the dumb fairy-thing you always
were.

Kitty: Oh, stop it! We don't have to be mean to each other. Just think
of all the others who's suffering  today, Alastaire, Amanda, yes, even
the Hellfire Club of London. They don't know what will become of them.
Think of Tangerine, She might never exist now.

<Her words don't make the others look any happier, but they all mutter
their approval. All but one.>

Kitty: Pete, come on. We don't want to be as dark and gloomy as...as
Vampirella, when the new writer turns up.

<Pete finally looks up, meets Kitty's eyes. She smiles sadly.
Gradually, her smile spreads to his eyes, though it never quite
reaches his mouth. It stops in the corner of his mouth and becomes his
usual sarcastic, fate-defying grin. This is love. This is what it
looks like. For better or for worse.>

Pete: Did you say anything about my fags, Kitty?

Lockheed: Pffft.

The end.







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