A Bedtime Story
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Kitty looked over at the three youths in front of her and smiled. For once
she was glad that Jubes had called her and asked her to help babysit the
three young mutants in front of her, they having been called to Muir Island
for physicals among other minor medical details. The other X-men were there
as well, but they were not being difficult in the "it is bedtime" category.
Now the three boys in front of her refused to go to sleep. Kitty looked
over at Jubilee who gave her a helpless look in return and she then looked
back at the boys and smiled mischieviously. "Okay kids...you don't want to
go to sleep right now huh???" The boys all nodded in synchronition it
seemed, and she laughed softly under her breath, "Okay...how about I tell
you all a story to help you fall asleep???" The green skinned youth by the
name of Leech looked up at her, his teddy bear stuffed under his arm,
"Leech would like to hear a story and so would Artie." It still amazed
Kitty that Leech seemed to know what the young visual telepath thought
before he could project it, but when Artie projected the picture of a story
book and lots of knights fighting dragons she knew that Leech had once
again hit the nail right on the head. She then looked over to Franklin who
nodded enthusiastically, "That would be great Ms. Kitty." Kitty almost
laughed at the name that young Franklin Richards had dubbed her, but
managed to keep silent. She quickly searched her mind for a story, and
thinking about it, knew that only one story beared continuing, "Okay
kids...this story is going to take a little background for you to
understand about it. It begins with a story I started a couple of years ago
to lull my friend Illayna to sleep at night. I simply called the story "The
Fairy Tale"..." Kitty quickly filled in the three boys in front of her
about the cast of characters she had in the last story, of a young woman by
the name of Pirate Kitty, her first mate Collosus, her dragon Lockheed, the
goofy wizard, the Prince with the cursed eyes, the princess who had gotten
cursed and was later rescued, the genie who had to prove herself again, and
of course the Fiend With No Name and the unforgettable Bamf! After she had
finished the story the boys looked up at her and demanded another story.
She smiled as she said, "Alright...the only character still in this story
is the Fiend with No Name, and maybe the Prince and his lady." She then
looked at the children before her and smiled, "Okay...we got to introduce
new characters into this mix, so pay attention...I'm going to call this
story..."

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A Twisted Fairy Tale

Our cast of characters...

Kitty Pryde as...The Dragon Lady

Piotr Rasputin as...The Prince of Russiania

Pete Wisdom as...The dark knight

Logan as...The Fiend With No Name

Kurt as...The Bamf!

Lockheed as...The Dragon King

Cable as...The good Prince and Link

X-Force as...Link's Merry Band

Rachel Summers as...The fairy queen

Storm as...The Storm Fairy

Scott and Jean Summers as...the Good King and Queen of the Land

Apocolypse as...the Evil fairy King

Xavier as...The Old King

And others that I shall of course make up as I go along.

Now onto the story...

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ONCE Upon a time in a land far far away...

There lived a princess. She was considered one of the most beautiful women
in all the land, and all knights competed for her favor. Her heart,
however, belonged to only one though...his name was Nicolas. King of the
foreign country of Russiania, the handsome young prince also loved the
princess...until one day the prince went on a crusade to stop some evil
doers in the Southern country...where the evil fairy King lurked, and where
the Old King Charles had disappeared many years before...in an attempt to
stop the evil he had gotten encased in an evil crystal, and thus remained
until the Chosen One comes and frees him from his evil prision. While he
was gone from her, there was a fire withing the palace where the princess
resided. Horribly scarred, and one of the few survivors, the princess
needed the love of Nicolas even more, but it was not to be. The prince
returned and came to her one day, not to proclaim his love and move up
their planned marriage however, now he was there to tell her of his guilt.
While he had been on a crusade in the north he had fallen in love with
another...and thus he wished to marry her instead of the princess. The
princess was devastated, and ran out into one of the worst blizzards the
North Country in which she lived had ever seen. That was the last anyone
ever saw of Princess Kate again.

She ran, without proper protection against the elements, until her limbs
froze and she fell in the snow...ready to die and escape the pain of her
life. She did not know however, that one of the dragons that all thought
dead during the great wars had been watching her since she was a small
girl...realizing that this one woman held the power of the dragons, and
could thus call them to her. This woman perhaps has the power to save us
all, the old dragon thought as he looked down at her, and perhaps kill the
humans that had taken so many of their numbers. He called upon one of his
comrades, the Storm Fairy, to lighten the storm enough so that he could
take the creature back with him to his lair in the mountains. There the
princess recovered her physical strength, but nothing the dragon master
could do could take away her hatred and pain that the young prince had
wrought on her heart. Realizing that she could understand and talk to the
dragons she then learned their ways and denounced her human heritage. She
embraced the ways of the dragons and started to build up a blockade to stop
them from being invaded by the outside world...to protect the rest of the
dragons from the inevitable exinction if she did nothing...and she refused
to think of the world outside her home, content to fly on the dragons'
backs and while away her days arguing philosophy with the dragon King,
Locksteed.

While she was gone she did not realize the tragedy that had unfolded in her
absence. The King and Queen had finally had a child whom they named
Christopher. Good Prince Christopher was a beautiful child, and the proud
parents planned a party in his honor...the celebration was short lived, for
lurking in the shadows was the evil Fairy Lord Ensabanar, who knowing that
the prince would one day destroy him, cast a curse on him...a disease that
would eventually kill the prince. The parents watched in horror as their
son slowly died before them. The king was finally left alone with his son
and was about to tell him his final goodbyes, when suddenly the room filled
with a magnificant brilliance and floating before them was the good Fairy
Queen, Rachel. Rachel looked down at the child, and loving the King and
Queen like her own parents she gave the Good King a way to save his
son...she would take the child far away, and break the curse over him so
that he would survive, but no one must ever know that the child had not
died in the chamber that day. Not knowing what else to do the King agreed,
and watched as his child and a good portion of his heart and soul left with
the fairy queen.

The "death" of the prince threw the kingdom into chaos and for many years
it reigned, but then something happened to make all of the players and
characters come into the game...the ultimate game between good and evil.

The whole series of events started when a dark knight realized the error of
his ways and turned to the side of good. The knight, simply going by the
name of Wisdom, refused to kill the Good King when ordered to by his bosses
in an evil army for the Evil Fairy King. The Evil Fairy King tried to have
him killed, but he the knight managed to use his enchanted sword at the
last moment to teleport into the mountains. Gravely injured, the knight
waited for death to claim him, and finally lost consciousness. He was
unprepared when he awoke to find a woman standing above him. Reaching for
his sword he was prepared to defend himself, but the woman just laughed
with a touch of bitterness, "Don't worry about it warrior. I won't harm
you. I simply go by the name of The Dragon Lady...and you???" He was
impressed with the woman's visage, which, while scarred slightly was still
beautiful he answered, "I am called Wisdom." He then, at her prompting told
her about all that had happened past the point she had left, he not knowing
who she was or how she came to be where she was now. She waited until the
end of the story and then looked to the Dragon Master, her distress
portraying itself to him, "I do not care for the affairs of most of the
outside world, but I DO care for the Good King and Queen...they were my
friends Locksteed...what should I do...from what this man tells me the evil
is spreading and will soon reach here whether we like it or not...we got to
do something to stop the eventuall fall of good..for our kingdom." The
dragon Master, while not overly pleased with her logic, knew that she was
right and therefore agreed that to go and help was the best course of
action. The dragon Lady then stood on the summit and cast a spell of
summoning, summoning the dragons to her side to help in the coming
battle...knowing they had to hurry. She also called up something she hoped
to never have to call on...pulling out a small bottle she took out the cork
with a faint pop, and out popped...THE BAMF!

The Bamf shook it's head and gazed around dazedly, "Woah...get one evil
sorceress mad and look where it lands ya...in a bottle. The world was then
punished and not able to partake of my great charm and wit." The little
creature then looked up at the woman before him and smiled hugely,
"HELLOOOO NUUURSSEE!!!" The Dragon Lady cursed as he flung himself into her
arms and tried to kiss her, "Look you little miserable degrading..."
Running out of nasty names to call the creature in her arms she simply
spread them wide and let him fall flat on his butt. Hitting the ground with
a muffled thump, the Bamf then looked at her and smiled hugely, "Oh
goody...I love it when a woman plays hard to get!!!" He then disappeared in
a cloud of of smoke and with a strong smell of sulfur and once again landed
in her arms. She looked over at the Dark knight and smiling at the creature
in her arms, too sweetly to be taken seriously said, "Guess what??? This
man is going to give you a woman when we get done defeating the evil that
once threatened the good queen and my cousin Pirate Kitty...that is IF you
help us." The Bamf smiled at her delighted at the prospect and running his
hand suggestively up her arm replied, "Suuuurrreee a woman...uh huh...right
*nudge nudge wink wink* we'll go with that." He then gave her a humongous
smile and turned toward the knight, a look of jealously immediately coming
across his face, "And who pray TELL is this???" The Dragon Lady made the
introductions, and then left the room...muttering about how it was that a
small miserable @#$@#%$# could be of any help to them she would never know,
and the Bamf followed her curvy shape with his eyes as she left. He then
looked at the knight and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like,
"I hope you get the pox and die." Wisdom's head snapped up at that comment,
eyes glaring as he asked, "WHAT did you say???" The Bamf looked down at the
pointed end of the sword the knight had just recieved back into his
possession and gulped, "I said that a woman like that can certainly get
by." The knight snarled under his breath, spouting out worse curse words
then the woman had and stalked from the room...a little blue creature
laughing mischieviously after him.

MEANWHILE...

Unbeknownst to all, the young prince had been taken to another realm,
raised, and finally returned on his own to his own dimension. There he had
founded a group of merry men and women. Some considered them terrorists,
some hellions, but Link preferred to think of his group as merely,
"Enterprising young mercenaries that happened to blow a lot of stuff
up...all the time". His true love, Betty (she went by the code name
Arrow...call her Betty and you tended to walk away losing more then a few
teeth), ran the local "Mercenaries R Us" weapons shop, which sat next to
the Local pub/restaurant/magic shop/explosives dealer/general store/all
night wagon rental shop/hole in reality...The Loopy. Run by a young woman
known only by the nickname "Blondie", possessing a cook by the name of
"Lock", and some other colorful characters you shall meet in a moment, "The
Loopy" was quite an attraction and quite a place to be...as long as you had
a lot of time on your hands...considering the fact that time passed oddly
in The Loopy and no one really cared what time it was anyway.

Link stood at the entrance along with his band Cannonball (tended to be a
weeee bit dimwitted and hit things with his head), Kaboom (a young woman
that had an obsessive WANT to blow everything up), Thunderhead (musclebound
and somewhat dimwitted), and Sunburn (drew some type of power off of the
sun, but it tended to give him a massive sunburn). The bands favorite
pastime was tormenting The Fiend With No Name...now known as Mad Mountain
Fiend With No Name (he had become a rancher/lumberjack after the princess
Jean had married the good prince Scott). They had just gotten done painting
his whole herd of dairy cows a lovely shade of bluish grey that matched the
horizion, so that the whole herd seemed to have disappeared off of the face
of the known planet to the unsespecting Fiend. They then all sat up in the
trees and laughed themselves silly as the Fiend looked for his herd, not
realizing that they were simply on the horizion line. Link had then gotten
a message from Arrow, and thus putting one of her namesake into the fiends
hide (they had been fighting for years and the Fiend had taken more then a
couple hunks out of him), they had left to go to the Loopy and find what
she wanted. As the band walked into the room Blondie looked up from where
she was serving drinks at the bar and waved at them, "Hey look Doug...we
got company!!!" A humongous top hat lifted from a poker game and blue eyes
peered out at the group, "So we do Blondie...hey guys and gals!!!" He
lifted his glass of some type of florescent liquid to them and then sipped
it, his eyes and everyone else's in the room switching to the corner where
a small lepracaun suddenly leaped up onto the table, a humongous tankard of
beer in his hand and exclaimed, "Ach...I be glaaddd to seeeez yee
kiddies..." The words were so badly slurred that Link and the others didn't
even try to comprehend their meaning, Link merely lifting his hand in a
slight wave, "Hey Sean...nice to see you are laying off the hard stuff." He
then turned toward Blondie and was about to ask about Arrow when suddenly
Doug shouted, "Tea time!!!" Everyone in the room then got up from their
tables and danced around them, Lock coming from the kitchen with a couple
of trays of fruitcakes and placed them on the tables. The patrons then
finished their dance and sat back down again like all was normal. Link
looked down into the bowl of one person near him and smiled...seeing the
results of Lock's famous flower soup. Petals floated on the water and the
patron...obviously new around here, just stared at it like it was going to
start moving.

They finally located Blondie again who was trying to explain to one of the
local lawmen that she had no idea where his superior went...he asked for
the Black Hole room, and thus they gave him the key...and he just
disappeared. Link quickly used the fairy magic he had learned and cast a
cloak of illusion around all of his band...all of them being quite popular
amongst the lawmen, and thus he didn't want them to notice their prescense.
Kaboom then mentioned in a mutter that they could blow him up like *snap*
that, but Link preferred a more subtle approach and used a fairy mind trick
on the dimwitted lawman. The man then left without a backward glance.
Blondie looked at him, thanked him and then told him all he needed to
know...Arrow had been taken by the evil Lord a while ago (she not knowing
the exact time of course) and that they had to rescue her...a little bird
had told her this. They then tried to get the little bird to tell them
more, but the bird was so drunk by that time that they couldn't get
anything out of him that passed for coherent.

The band then went and picked up a lot of weapons from the "Mercenaries R
Us" supply and were off...Link and the others singing a merry little tune
of travel that told of a knight that had been stupid enough to jump off a
cliff without calling his dragon to catch him. The song then told in
graphic detail what happened when the knight then...got rescued by a witch,
married the woman like an idiot, and ended up with nine children, and
eventually turned into a toad when he got her mad when he told her about
his mistress (the lyrics were of course more graphic). Link hoped that
Arrow was okay, but quickly pushed the concern to the back of his mind as
they entered...The Black and Really Overdramatically Spooky Forest (the
villagers weren't known for their short namings). Link and his merry band
treked across the black ground, surrounded by the black trees, overlooked
by a black sky, Kaboom mentioning that the evil doers who were STUPID
enough to make this place should have gotten a better color scheme.
Suddenly they heard a scuffling through the trees and knowing there was
evil afoot (as heros for some odd reason tend to do), they crashed through
the trees and underbrush to find a group of evil doers (as I told you heros
just have a knowing for this type of thing), and two people fighting
fiercely against the black wraithlike things. Kaboom immediately, not
needing any prompting, sent a barrage of explosives into the mix of bodies,
her aim (thank the heavens) impecable, as she used the explosives to
seperate the beings. Cannonball of course, jumped in and just started
hitting things with his head, Thunderhead doing his work with his meaty
fists and arms. Sunburn wasn't worth anything due to the absense of light
and thus stood on the sidelines and cheered as Link joined the fray. Link
and the others quickly made quick work of the ruffians, and then they all
turned as one toward the two people left standing. They watched as the two
figures threw back the hoods of their cloaks to reveal...the KING and
QUEEN?!?

Good King Scott looked over at people who had saved their lives and then
told of how they had gotten ambushed on their way back to the castle. They
had been fighting the evil for years now, but had been unable to do more
then hold a stalemate against the evil Fairy King and his dark dominions,
they even suspected that the evil fairy King had brought the crystal that
had imprisioned the Old King Charles in...and if that was the case they
might even be able to stop him from spreading his evil further. Link and
his band understood, except for Cannonball who had hit one of the men too
hard and had knocked himself unconscious, and they quickly planned on how
to get back to the castle that had now been taken over by the Evil Fairy
King. They were in the middle of a complex system of deciding...both sides
doing paper/sissors/rock for which plan they were going to use, when a
fluttering of wings was heard above them, the black trees getting pushed
aside from the force.

The Good King and the rest of the band looked up to see a host of dragons
hover in the air above them. The Dark Knight Wisdom looked more then a
little bit pale as he looked down at the ground so far below him, but the
Dragon Lady looked at home as she asked Locksteed to land. She then hugged
the King and Queen, the couple shocked and pleased that she was still
alive. They did not particularly trust Wisdom, but when The Dragon Lady
assured them that he was there merely to help, they trusted her. She then
filled them in on how she had been pulled into the fight and told them that
she had seen the results of the evil that had taken over the land as she
looked down upon it from the dragon's back. Not knowing how they were going
to get into the castle, unless they blew out the wall and threatened to
bring the whole place tumbling in, as Kaboom adamantly supported, the
couple didn't know how they were going to get the front gate open, go
rescue Arrow and the Good King, and restore good to the land. The Dragon
Lady told them that she had it covered and had the Storm Fairy drag out a
bundle of magical cloth. She then opened it, the Bamf immediately
plastering himself to her, "Hello m'love...I knew you couldn't leave me in
there...you and that knight don't have half the chemistry we do...when will
you realize that I'm your dreamboat???" She yanked the Bamf off of her and
said calmly, "He will open up the front gate for us. He promised to help as
long as I get him a woman." The Bamf looked up at her adoringly and smiled
lustily at her in response and said, "Sure...I'll get you all in...not a
problem." Locksteed just rolled his massive eyes and wondered how they were
going to get rid of the pesty little critter.

They quickly flew over The Really Mucky Swamplike Body of Water (as stated
before the villagers didn't know about short namages), The Really Green
Meadow, The Really Rocky Boulder Patch, and finally to the boundaries of
the kingdom.

The Bamf quickly found the locking mechanism for the front gate after he
bamfed in and he quickly unlocked the front gate...letting a whole host of
dragons and others inside. They stormed the castle quickly, the Good King
Scott taking the lead, and Kaboom blowing up all that were stupid enough to
get behind them. They made their way to the main throne room, and found the
Evil Fairy King sitting as cocky as ever on his new throne. In his hands, a
knife to her throat was Arrow. He smiled at the host of good guys and
snarled, his black wings fluttering in fury, "What are you going to do now
oh great champions of good???" Link looked at Arrow and put up a certain
amount of finger movements silently to communicate to her what they were
going to do. She gave him a slight thumbs up right when the Good King
stepped forward, "Release her Ensabanur...she is not what you want...you
want my throne and my life...take it without the use of innocents to get
what you want." The Evil Fairy King was about to retort when Link shouted
"NOW!!!" and Arrow rammed her elbow back into the evil Fairy King's
stomach. He released her with a muffled "oof" and The Dragon Lady let out a
dragon screech, loud enough to wake the dead, but also enough to summon the
dragons to her assistance. The dragons swooped upon the dominions of the
Dakr Fairy King and he snarled in fury as his strength was slowly eaten
away. He looked at The Dragon Lady and shouted for one of his champions.
The Dragon Lady gasped as she saw the man she used to love...Nicolas stand
next to the man she now called enemy. He looked as equally shocked, but not
for long. Looking at the knight behind her he snarled out a fowl oath and
growled, "I was going to come for her, but you stole her from me now when
finally I realize how much I love her...you shall die for this
transgression lesser being!!!" He then threw his dagger, piercing the armor
of Wisdom. THe Dragon Lady shouted in fury and in pain...realizing how much
she cared for the man, and calling upon her magic shot, not Nicolas, but
the Evil Fairy King through the heart, The Good King and Queen adding their
magic, as well as Link and his fairy magic.

The Dark Fairy King was slow to fall, but he did...falling to the floor and
there he laid unmoving. Wisdom slowly sat up to the shock of all and pulled
the knife from his shoulder, "Owww...damn that hurt" he muttered as he
looked at the flesh wound left from the knife. The Dragon Lady was about to
comment a growling retort when she saw the hand of the Evil Fairy King lift
from the floor and target, not the Good King, but Locksteed. It was in that
moment that she realized exactly where her love lied, and shouting a
warning to Locksteed she threw herself into the blast to stop it from
hitting him. The Bamf shouted in fury and threatened all types of bodily
harm to the evil creeps. Locksteed let out a roar of fury, drowning out the
sounds of the other dragons, and they released that fury upon the Dark
Fairy King...ash being all that remained when they were done.

Nicolas, shook his head...wondering what had happened and where he
was...the dark spell finally broken that had been put over him, and looking
down at the woman he loved dying felt his heart tear. He hit the floor
beside Wisdom and asked, "Is there something that we can do???" Wisdom
looked up at him, and realizing that he was indeed once again good shook
his head his eyes showing the love he had for the woman below him,
"No...there is nothing we can do...the spell was to kill and kill it will."
Suddenly a voice spoke to all of their minds, time slowing to a standstill
as a woman appeared before them, "Surely you jest young knight...love...the
true kind...conquers all. She will live for long enough. Onto other matters
now...The Evil King is Dead and therefore good will be restored to the
land...Arrow lives and will be a good match to you Link for years to come.
Now it is time...Good King Scott...Good Queen Jean...the man standing
before you is your son." Scott and Jean looked over at Link silently, and
finally seeing the resembelences shouted in joy and hugged him to them,
Link trying to get free as soon as possible and looking to Arrow for
help...she merely laughing her butt off that now the sterling reputation of
the royal family was tainted by an outlaw in the family. The Fairy Queen
then looked toward the crystal none had noticed when they had arrived, and
lifting a hand fired her fairy magic at it. It split open and out spilled
out spilled the good King Charles. He looked around wondering what in the
bloody blue blazes was going on, but was quickly filled in by Kaboom and
some of the others. The queen then turned to the Bamf and with a flash of
her hand he was facing a lovely, energetic, and very lusty female Bamf. His
eyes widened in surprise and as she threw herself into his arms he let out
a shout of horror. He then ran for his life, screaming that this was not
the type of woman he had in mind. The fairy queen, a smile of amusement
lighting her face, lastly turned to Locksteed, "She is ready my friend...do
what you must." Locksteed nodded, and closing his eyes drew his power to
him and cultivated it...realizing how much he loved the woman below him. He
the waited until all was right and released the power into the mortal form
below him. The scars on her flesh healed as scales grew and form changed. A
moment later she stood...a beautiful gold dragon looking over them all.
Seeing in the eyes that this was indeed Kate, Nicolas stepped forward and
said, "I am sorry..." her mental voice cut him off 'Do not apologize
Nicolas...for I have found true happiness with Locksteed..and now I shall
be able to spend all eternity with him...or as long as we both shall live."
With that she and her true love flew off into the night, the joyful cries
of the dragons being heard behind them.

The fairy queen then looked approvingly after them and disappeared in a
flash of fairy magic... leaving the Good King and Queen to rule their
kingdom with the advising of the good King Charles as their head advisor.
Link then went off and lived in sin with Arrow...also becoming her partener
at "Mercenaries R Us"...them eventually going interdimensional with the
idea and becoming quite rich in their own right after the royal family gave
up on him being the King anytime soon. As far as everyone knows (including
those little birds) Link's merry band is still tormenting the law and
having fun torturing Mad Mountain Fiend with No Name, and the Dragon Lady
is happy as the new Dragon Queen, loving Locksteed like no other ever could
and he her.

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Kitty looked down at the sleeping youths before her and smiled
slightly...she was good what could she say. She then looked over at the
sleeping form of Jubilee and smiled brighter...better then she thought. She
phased softly out of the room, and looking at the visage of the X-men
before blushed up to her eyebrows. She then glared at the lot of them and
said, "What??? Do you people stalk me or something???" Cable laughed as he
laid a hand on her shoulder...all of them having of course been
easedropping the entire time since they had gotten back from their
respective locations, "You are going to HAVE to tell me the first story
sometime Kitty...that one was great... and I even admit I liked the
ending." Scott smiled, his arm around Jean as Logan looked over at Kurt
where he sat on the wall, "Well at least you got a love life in a story
fuzzy." Kurt then threw a pillow at him as they all laughed, having been
able to take a break from the real world temporarily in Kitty's Twisted
Little Fairy Tale.

The End