Written as a Long Stand Alone (Was written so it can be read with out reading the first story).

Sequel to Dream Once More (Archived at the Sand lot)

Author: T. Claybourne  (t.claybourne@yahoo.com)

AU And Crossover

Rating: Rated R most chapters for violence and Language, some are NC-17 for sexual content

A/N I'd like to thank my Beta Reader Hawera And muses Michelle Branch, Robbie Williams and Evanescence

Chapter 20 Facing Life or Death

Hearing the doorbell, Giles said, "That must be Spike"

Buffy turned from the sink where she was drying dishes as Dawn washed. "Spike?"

"Yes. I didn't mention it earlier because I wanted to save you getting all tense and nervous."

Giles headed to the door. "He's here to get his things and keys to an apartment we arranged for him earlier this afternoon."

"Oh," responded Buffy, as she slumped against the counter.

Dawn wiped her hands and touched Buffy's shoulder. "Now's your chance to talk to him."

"Yeah, but what do I say?"

"Start with, I'm sorry, and go from there."

Buffy looked at Dawn. "When did you get so smart?"

"I always have been. You just finally started to listen to me."

Buffy smiled. "OK, here goes nothing," and she headed to the front room. Dawn followed.

There, in a pair of sweat pants, black t-shirt, his boots, and wearing his second newly purchased, this time due to the first being shot to tatters, long leather coat was Spike. Buffy stood staring. The sweat pants surprised her ,but even more so the swollen nose with bruises that extended around his eyes and then on into his forehead. Xander stood next to him.

Dawn spoke some of the words that Buffy couldn't get out. "Oh my god, Spike, what happened to your nose?"

"That," started Xander. "Was a little gift from Mia earlier today. I came home this about midday and there he was, bleeding all over the floor."

Spike turned to glare at Xander, but caught the widening of Dawn's eyes.

"If she did that at noon then in class you were..."

"If you say it out loud to anyone I'll..."

She crossed her arms over her chest and asked cockily, "You'll what?"

"I have quite a bleeding arsenal of embarrassing Dawn moments from your formative years in Sunnydale, things I'm sure you wouldn't want any of your mates here to know."

Dawn's eyes narrowed. "Fine, but with this we're totally even."

"Fine." Spike's eyes narrowed.

Buffy spoke up then. "What are you two talking about?"

In unison they responded, "Nothing."

Feeling a little braver, Buffy asked," So, why did she hit you?"

"No good reason."

"Not likely," she replied, with a big smile.

"I'm with Buffy on that one," said Xander. "Tell them why she hit you."

"Shut it, Xander."

"Tell us, Spike," asked Dawn.

"Bloody hell, what is this, the inquisition?"

Giles smiled. "I would say you are at a disadvantage. Of course, if you don't want to tell us, you could always let Dawn demonstrate how she put you on your arse earlier today."

Xander punched Spike lightly on the arm. "What, you dog, you never mentioned that. OK. Let's just say he used a certain term that pissed Mia off. I believe she had asked him not to use that specific expression several times before but he did it again so.... BAM."

Spike looked at Xander. He wasn't quite sure whether to be mad or grateful.

Buffy grinned and tilted her head just a bit. "I've hit you for less."

Spike smiled back. "That's true."

"Of course, your nose never looked like you visited the front side of a bowling ball going ninety miles per hour, but hey, to each their own."

Xander looked at Dawn and Giles. "What say you two fill me in on this whole Spike on his ass thing out in the garden?"

As they headed in that direction Giles said, "Dawn, I think it would be worthwhile if you tell the part of the story where Mia called me the best Watcher ever."

Buffy looked at Spike. "She said that, and that we were the qunitasomething Slayer Watcher team?"

"Quintessential, and yes, she did."

"Where do you think she got an idea like that?"

"Besides the journals she's reading, Wesley and..."

"You?"

"Yes, there was talk of how you two always thwarted my plans and avoided apocalypses."

"So you never actually said..."

"Definitely didn't sodding use that word, but she knew I admired your technique. If you're asking if I ever came out and told her what a great woman you were well, no, I couldn't now, could I? She knew our history and I didn't think it bloody fair to rub that in."

Buffy moved to sit on the sofa. Spike chose a chair opposite.

"I just wondered if she was as petrified of me as I was of her."

Spike shook his head. He knew this was part of it, hell Mia herself had said so, but to hear Buffy say it, well it had an effect on him. But the day he'd had made him not want to give in to any of it.

"Bloody hell, Buffy, she was so scared she left us standing in the alley after seeing our reunion. Wes told me later that she couldn't stop crying. Emma left me after that kiss you and I shared then, said she knew it was over and that she understood. She was more than scared, she was resigned to it. I think back to that time, I remember our kiss, and I understand why she felt that way. Emma knew the story, and how I got my soul for you. But Buffy, that kiss made it obvious.... you wanted me back. You.... unlike her then, didn't have any idea what the situation would be for any of us this time round. Nothing was obvious., nothing but the fact she left me, and had moved on."

"I don't mean it as an excuse. But back then, after everything we had been through, I found you alive in Los Angeles and you chose her. I was afraid it would happen again."

"And if you had maybe sodding tried to talk to me about it? I thought we had got to the stage where we could talk about everything, and that because we could talk, the future for us would be different."

"I'm sorry. It was wrong of me, and it was a big mistake for me not to have more faith in you. I know it's too late. I'm only asking you to.... forgive me .... Not... to take me back. I heard through the Scooby grapevine that you are going to spend time on your own, and I just want you to know I respect your decision."

Spike didn't say anything because he didn't know what to say. Two apologies in one day: he would need to get Mia to record it for the Watchers' Archives. He decided that his best course was not to say a thing. He would bask in what she had just said. Besides, if he opened his mouth now he'd cock it up anyway. Spike reached forward and grasped her hand briefly, then he stood up and smiled at her.

"I'd better get my stuff. Harris is probably itching to get home to Mia."

Buffy smiled back. "So they are...?"

"Oh yeah, but neither will sodding admit it"

"And you are OK? Because I remember how I felt when I saw Riley with his wife.

"I don't think we should talk about this."

"Spike, I'm a big girl. If you're OK, I'm OK."

"Harris makes her smile and laugh."

He turned, taking a few steps toward the front window, and looked out into the dark. Buffy, still seated on the couch, watched as he seemed to slip away.

"She's different, you know. When she was Emma she used to try to make me laugh. I mean it was a thing she did, a goal she had, to see how much laughter she could get out of Spike. We used to laugh all the time ...well, not any more. She doesn't do that now. It's other people trying to make her laugh or smile. OK, to be honest we sparred tonight and there was a brief glimpse of how she had been, but then Harris came in and she ran over to him. That hurt a bit. This evening was hard. We were going over files and started talking, just like we used to when we ran the school at the hotel. Things aren't the same now. There is no passion left. The pain really now comes more from mourning the life we lived, the life that is now obviously lost."

"Yeah, that, and my little sister put you on your butt."

Spike shook himself from his reverie and chuckled. He turned towards a grinning Buffy.

"Hey, she made me proud of both of them. I was taken by surprise and that doesn't usually happen with little non-Slayer humans"

"So Mia, she's going to be good at this training thing?"

Spike's eyebrow went up.

"OK, yes... you trained her."

" And that kind of thinking is exactly why your grades were so good this semester."

Buffy smiled as she stood. "I'm going to go get you a drink. I think after what I've heard of your day, you could use one." ~ ~ ~ Spike took his scotch to the back door and watched as Dawn demonstrated the move on Xander. He smiled, seeing Harris hit the ground. The three of them outside laughed. He finished his drink, placed the glass in the sink and strode outside.

"OK, bit, let's show the moves to the others."

"Oh no, you're still mad."

"Xander, give her what's in your pocket so she feels safe. We'll work on a few new ones that you can show the teacher tomorrow before class."

Dawn clasped the stake and looked at Spike.

Spike changed into game face. "This time I'll be a.... genuine vampire."

Dawn started to laugh.

Still in his demon face, Spike crossed his arms across his chest. "What's so funny?"

This seemed to make her laugh harder.

"Pet, genuine vampire here, is your adrenaline kicking in?"

That sent peels of laughter his way.

Spike rolled his golden eyes. Dawn was bent over with laughter.

Buffy came to the door and saw and her leaning over, giggling, while Spike stood in his demon visage, his arms crossed.

Buffy looked at Xander. "What's going on?"

"I think it's a private joke because I do not even the tiniest bit get it."

Just then Spike stepped forward, and with one finger gave Dawn a push. She fell over with a splat, right on her butt.

Her laughter stopped for a moment. Spike morphed back to his human face with a huge grin. Dawn gave a small giggle.

Spike put out a hand to give her a lift up. "Now we're even, love," he smirked.

Xander looked at Spike. "Oh, crafty, as in.....that..... is your craft...ah shit."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Mia walked through the front door. Willow was sitting on the couch, watching something on TV.

"Hi Mia"

"Hi Willow, how was your day?"

"OK."

"That's good to hear."

Mia walked on by and headed down to the kitchen. Willow followed her.

"The Jambalaya was good: spicy, but good. I drank three beers and made Xander jealous because he couldn't as he was going to drive you home. Where is Xander?"

Mia pulled down the vodka and poured a sixteen ounce glass full, no ice, no tonic, no interruptions. She drank it down and poured another.

"Wait, please tell me where Xander is. You are scaring me a bit with the vodka guzzle thing."

Mia turned to Willow. "Sorry, he is fine. He took Spike to get his things from Giles's place and then to Spike's new apartment."

Mia drank down half of the glass of vodka, and sighed.

"Well, did something happen? I mean, you are, like, getting down with the vodka. And anyway, where did it come from?"

"Xander picked it up for me, and what happened can be summed up in one small irritating word. Spike"

Willow grinned then. "Oh that. Been there, done that many times."

Mia sat down at the table and laid her head on her arms.

"Well, not done as in... done... because... hey, he's male, but you know what I mean."

"He is driving me crazy. I'm saying and doing things I'd never do, or at least, that I thought I'd never do."

"Just so you know that is normal, it's called by the rest of us 'the Spike effect'. I have a theory that when you were Emma and he was in love with you, there was some sort of dampening field around you; but now, well, I guess the Spike effect is in full force and you are no longer immune."

Mia lifted her head and smiled. "Dampening field, immune?"

"Yeah"

Mia laughed then. "I guess it is a plausible theory. Perhaps you and I could put together a paper."

"Yeah, we could have the Council publish it."

"Oh shit, just imagine the look on his face if he read it." Mia put her hand over her mouth.

Willow was holding back a laugh.

"You would have to put up a de- invite spell."

"He would come after us?"

" Pfft.....Well, he would try. Actually, I would really worry about you out on your own."

"Well that's sweet. But remember, powerful witch here."

"I can see it now. He'd get all growly. I'd have to hit him and break his nose again and then the effect would take hold ...again... and we would be at its mercy.... again. It would be a horrible vicious circle."

"You broke his nose today?"

"Oh yeah, big time. Big bruises."

"Did he deserve it? Did I just ask if Spike deserved it?" Willow grinned.

"He called Xander 'monkey boy' for like the fourth time."

"Did he tell you why he called him that?"

"He said it was because Xander was everyone's butt monkey."

"Well, that isn't fair. Spike wasn't even there when Xander said that. I wasn't either. It was after Dracula put him in a thrall." Willow put her hands on her hips.

"So then, Spike more than deserved it." Mia shrugged.

"You're darn tootin'."

"I have work to do that I didn't get done this morning."

"I have home work too. I have website updates and a private network announcement to prepare."

"I'll get my stuff, you get yours, and we can keep each other company down here." ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Xander found Willow and Mia both working on their computers at the kitchen table.

"He's all settled. Giles even gave him a bottle of Scotch. That brought big smiles from our boy."

"Hmmph," was Mia's only comment

"Not too happy with Spike right now," supplied Willow.

"You're still upset because of having to apologize."

"No, just the thorn-in-my-side-all-day aspect of him," she looked up, over her computer.

"Oh."

"I explained about The Spike Effect. You see, she's never really experienced it before today."

"We have though, haven't we, Will?"

"Yes Siree Bob."

Xander leaned over Willow's shoulder. "What's this? And is that who I think it is?"

"It's the announcement going out over our secure server to all known Watchers and Slayers."

"But is that........ I mean in that picture she looks different."

Willow looked over at Mia. Mia looked back. "What?"

Willow signaled for her to come and look. There, on the screen, was a picture of Emma. She seemed very alive, her chestnut hair glistening and her eyes smiling. She looked joyous, but that had gone now that she was Mia and there was instead a vulnerability around her eyes. Mia wasn't sure if the others could see it, but she could. The picture of Emma was of someone happy and in love. The picture beside it was Mia as she was now. Her hair was blonde, and with the two pictures side by side you could see the grey dead tint her skin had now. She didn't exactly look sad, but she didn't look happy as she had in the other picture. Mia quickly read the announcement.

Mia looked at Xander. "It's Emma, and me. Willow, that picture of Emma, where did you get it?"

"Wesley found it for me. Wolfram and Hart took head shots for your files or something."

"Right, I remember."

Mia stood up and walked out of the back door. She went straight to the shed and rooted around until she found an opened pack of cigarettes she had hidden there. She lit up and took a long drag. She leaned against the shed and stayed in the shadows. She was halfway through her cigarette when Xander came out the back. She watched as he looked around.

"Mia?"

She stomped out her cigarette and stepped out from the shadows. "What?"

"Are you alright?"

"No, I am a fucking vampire. I have to drink blood. I'll never see a sunrise unless I want to incinerate."

"Not so much the first part about the vampire, because you said we have to wait for the first date before we can even think in that direction, but otherwise you're feeling sorry for yourself?"

"Shit, you're brave."

"No, ask anyone... mostly stupid."

She smiled. "Quit trying to make me laugh. I was having a good pity party. After reading that announcement, Xander, I looked back at the last nine months and you know what I saw. I saw that if someone was writing a fan fiction, I would be a big Mary Sue."

"Mary Sue?"

"Please, you of all people cannot pretend not to know what a Mary Sue is."

"Nope, not following you."

"You are such a bad liar. You know vampires can tell things like that. Fan fiction posted on the internet, like maybe at a Stargate Fan Fiction website or what might you watch um, an Enterprise Fan Fic site."

"OK, let's say... I have read... some of this stuff and.... we are... just saying that... why would I know what a ....."

"Not from fan fiction but Wesley Crusher, big fat Mary Sue."

Xander chuckled. "You are nothing like Wesley Crusher."

"OK, let me add this up for you: girl from tragic past, over-intelligent, imbued with super powers, falls for vampire with a soul. While this happens she gets a high-paying job working with mystical books and with an expert on them, and with languages which she learns quickly. She makes friends with all the people she works with, OK all but Harmony, but otherwise everyone there pretty much loves her. In walks her boyfriend's ex, the one he got his soul for, who wants said boyfriend back but boyfriend chooses this girl over the ex; BUT this ex still likes her. Actually fights side by side with her as they save another vampire with a soul. So flash forward. This girl is in England, and what do you know, seems everyone loves her there too. Big announcements are going out about how important she is to the Council because, get this: now not only does she have super powers but she has twenty times the super powers. And the boyfriend she left broken-hearted in L.A. by ending the relationship with him through a note on the TV, actually can stand spending time with her. ... I'm too perfect."

"You kind of forgot to mention the part where you are a vampire, can't ever go in the sun and have to drink blood. Also you are kind of short-tempered with that ex-boyfriend, even though he is willing to accept you. You actually kind of pick on him. As for being perfect, you swear, and drink and I think you were just smoking. So, perfect, not so much. I will admit the way you sometimes figure out what people are going to do or think freaks me out, so I'm not really sure what column to put that in.

"Column?"

"Yeah, I'm thinking you should start two in your journal, the Mary Sue or Not column."

Mia smiled. "So what happens if the Mary Sue column wins?"

"Well, you'll have to do some sort of re-write."

Mia laughed. "Can you do that?"

"Oh no, not me: I'm the goofy side kick. You know what that means?"

"Haven't got a clue."

"I never get to have sex with the heroine."

Mia grinned as she leaned forward and pushed a piece of hair back from his forehead. "Well then, I choose not to be the heroine, OK?"

"Yeah, really?"

Mia stepped back. "You thought Emma was prettier, didn't you?"

"What?"

"The picture of Emma: you thought she was prettier."

"She was happier. The picture they have of you was taken the day after you got here, and you look different now."

"You thought Emma looked happier?"

"I think that she was in love, she kind of glowed. Was that when you? I mean Emma was with ..."

"Yes."

Xander took her face in his hands and ran his thumbs down her jaw. He leaned forward and kissed her. Mia opened up to him and their tongues met. Mia let her hands drift to his waist, then up under his shirt.

Xander stepped back and looked at her. He wanted to ask just what she was feeling, but he would wait until after Saturday night for that: her reaction was clue enough. Instead, his conversation with Spike came back to him as he thought of her reaction, to the picture of Emma.

"You know what, Mia? You kind of glow now; it's beautiful. I know you've had a rough day so don't think about it now, but maybe tomorrow or the next day get that digital camera of yours out and look."

He turned and walked in the house

Mia took a few steps and sank into a nearby lawn chair. She felt dizzy... she glowed? Emma had glowed but Emma had been.... then a fear ripped through her. What if he was right? Wait a minute, Spike. Spike had said something tonight. Oh. Mia sat frozen. She didn't know how long it was that she sat there, but one thought penetrated. .... Spike. ......

She walked inside and upstairs to the sideboard. The house was quiet and in darkness. She used the pencil to shade in the impressions on the note pad so that she could read what had been written there. Then she called a cab and went outside the front door to wait. It finally arrived and dropped her at the address on the paper. She went down the stairs to the basement level apartment, and knocked at the door. There was no movement so she knocked harder. That did it: she heard movement. Mia knocked once more just to be sure, and because she was getting impatient. None of this could be true. She knew that merely being with Spike would change everything for her. It didn't matter what that kiss had said, she just knew that if they were together tonight, that would put things right: it always had, and it would again.

"I'm bloody well coming, give a body a chance."

Spike pulled open the door.

"Spike, I need you."