Subject: [BA_Gutter] Dream Once More 35 Date: Thu, 29 Apr 2004 21:29:58 -0000 From: "Tracy" Author: T. Claybourne Rated: Up to NC-17 Disclaimer: Fox, Mutant Enemy and all involved parties own the characters of Angel and BTVS I just use them purely for entertainment purposes. Emma is mine but the others are just over to play nice . Teaser: Buffy comes to LA, Angel is different and Spike is with some one else. Feed Back: In the fan fic game it is the vote of confidence and the reason to keep writing, so yes please. ++++++++++++++++++++++ Dream Once More 35 Angel looked down at Cordy's still form. She was so beautiful and peaceful looking; if only he could feel that much peace. He pulled up a chair and took her hand. "Cordelia, I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by. How's it going?" Her answer was silence. "Yeah, you're right, I'm lying. I needed to see you. I miss you and, well, it's been a little crazy. Remember how you used to inject all that reality into the crazy for me?" Angel touched her hair and pushed it back a bit. "Cordy, it doesn't seem fair: people around me always getting hurt; now this Drusilla and this Emma thing. I can't think. I don't know what to do." He laid his head on the bed next to her hip, took an unnecessary deep breath, and sighed. He missed Cordy more than anyone would guess. He smiled at the thought of Buffy realizing just how deep his feelings for Cordy were. The thing he had with Cordy was different from what he had had with Buffy; they had grown together as friends, grown to love each other, and then…Well, then Connor and all that stuff had started. If Cordy awoke today, he would tell her how he felt. Angel had gone over in his mind how he would or should have told her. Their love was not about his redemption, his finding purpose in life, or unrequiteable passion like it had been with Buffy; it was much more, and also, because of his fear of telling Cordy how he felt, much less then it could have been. Angel felt a hand on his head and jumped, wondering how a nurse had snuck up on him. He saw it was Cordelia. She rasped, "Angel?" He was too afraid to break the spell, so he said nothing. "Excuse me, but I think I was the one in the coma, not you…. Could you say something, or is this all one big coma dream?" "Cordelia," Angel whispered. "Oh. It speaks. Vampire and afraid to speak to a post-coma patient, and you are in big trouble, mister… I mean, how could you let them put me in this awful polyester nightgown? A hospital gown would look and feel better. You couldn't splurge on silk? I mean, really, it's not as if I would be… ah, never mind that." Her smile seemed to light up the dark room. Angel felt himself really smile for the first time in almost a year. "So, you're in a mess again, and eew, Drusilla? What was that all about?" Angel looked away but Cordy went on. "Ok, granted, the whole `Master in your blood and the First trying some of its tricks' had something to do with it but Drusilla, Angel!" "Cordy, we need to call the doctor. They should know you're awake." "No, that might mean tests and, frankly, all I want to do is get the hell out of here." She got up slowly. After testing her legs, she made her way across the room to a dresser and started opening drawers. Angel just watched, shocked and thrilled by the turn of events. "Oh my god, what in the hell is this here for?" Angel, startled at first, looked closely at the yoga suit in Cordy's hands. "Right, coma girl was going to be doing some Pilates. Why would someone leave this here? Oh well, it'll do. It gets me out of this Kmart special." She started to unbutton the front of her gown; before it dropped, Angel turned away. "Angel, what am I going to do with you?" "Ah… well." "I mean, a girl sleeps about a year and you are in all kinds of trouble. The Master, the First Evil, Druzzilla, and now this mess with a slayer. What is it with you and slayers? They're not any luck for you. What you need is a nice part demon … ah well, anyway, you can turn around. I am dressed if that's what you want to call it." He turned to see her in the chocolate brown suit. The brown made her eyes even bigger. She was definitely a beauty, but she knew that. "So come on, let's go fix this." "Cordy, how- how do you know about all this?" "Vision girl, remember? I just couldn't say anything with the coma and all. Angel, about my whole trying to…" Angel held up his hand. "Cordelia, you never have to apologize for that; none of it was your fault. We were just chess pieces and I …" Cordelia cocked her head. "Yeah, chess, but not so boring, and no clubs." That made him smile. "I love that." She smiled back "What?" "Your smile. It's nice to see it twice in one night. Maybe we should play the lottery, but no, I know we won't win." She tapped her temple. "Vision girl thing." * * * * * Spike had heard Wesley and Gunn talk about the Lurker, and he couldn't even envision the possibility. Maybe they could get it to give Emma her life back, maybe not. He felt lost and angry and he knew Emma's death was entirely his fault. If only he had killed Dru when he had the chance. He was determined to find her and kill her now. Then he'd have to... Just the thought of it made him want to cry but he wouldn't; he had to turn his pain to anger, make that anger work for him. It was the only way he would be able to kill Emma. Oh god, he had to kill his Emma. He knew it wasn't her, it was a demon, but still it would look like her. Maybe he could wait, see if the demon was as bad as the others. Dru had turned her; maybe Emma would hold on to some of her more human tendencies like he had. But first he had to find her, or rather them. Walking out into the night, he took a deep breath to clear his mind and lungs, then took a breath through his nose and concentrated, trying to pinpoint even a hint of Drusilla and Emma. * * * * * Gunn was trying to arrange the Lurker's transportation and Wes and Fred were looking for other alternatives. No one had heard from Angel; he had the final say, but they would call him the moment they had anything concrete. Giles sat in a chair in Wes's office, periodically cleaning his glasses. If the others accomplished their goal, Emma would be a powerful asset for his efforts to rebuild the council. But was it the right thing, would she want it? Willow had brought Buffy back and that had been difficult for Buffy. These were questions they should put to Spike, but the others seemed to have forgotten him in their current activities. Giles kept picturing the love he saw between Spike and Emma. It had changed the vampire; Giles had seen the small changes. The fact that Spike, Emma, Buffy, and Wesley had been able to work together said something. Giles had known that Spike was not right for Buffy but he seemed to work with Emma; they had no past to haunt them. * * * * * Buffy and Willow sat on the table in the conference room adjacent to Angel's office. "I feel guilty, Will. I mean, I am so happy to see you but it's all major crisisy and all with Emma." "I know, me too, but really, maybe we could do something. I know the others are working on saving her, but, well, you and I know she will be a demon and with her smarts and slayer powers she…" "Is one monster no one would want to run into? Remember that other slayer that was turned? Crazy, killing everyone. God, I can't even think of Emma being like that." Willow looked sad. "I only just met her and, wow, what a difference she made in Spike." Buffy looked out the window at that comment. Spike. How come no one had worried about him? "I mean, he shouldn't have to… maybe he should kill Dru, but not Emma. Could you imagine? What if it was, say, Dawn or Xander that was turned? Think about it." "Well, I have the stuff for a locator spell. Let's do it; we could find her. With my magic and your slayerness, we should be able to handle it on our own; no worries of the others acting too soon." * * * * * Angel couldn't stop looking at Cordy as they drove to Wolfram and Hart. The wind blew her hair and the moon shone on her face and she smelled so Cordy-like. "Angel, please watch the road; I don't want to end up in another hospital ever again. And now is as good a time as any other to talk to you about this. What in the hell are you doing in the belly of the beast? I mean, I had one in me and, well, it's no fun; it's scary and makes you do bad, bad, very bad things." "You mean the Wolfram and Hart thing?" "Ah, duh, yes. They were our enemies through the years, and now you run the place. Sounds crazy to me. Did some brain cells die when you were at the bottom of the ocean?" Angel flinched. "I'm sorry, honey, it's just, well, geez Angel! Wolfram and Hart?" "Well, we thought we could change things from the inside out and …" "Blah blah blah, that's just talk. You made a deal with the devil, even though it wasn't a completely selfish thing, but…" "Connor was going to kill you, kill a lot of people." "I know, but honey…" She placed her hand on his. It felt warm to Angel, nice warmth. "Ok, I can see why, but after this you should know…" "We can't go back, Cordelia. We have to make it work." "And so then we will. I know you, and you are pretty amazing. If any vampire could resist temptation and work from the inside of evil and succeed it will be you, but first you have to think about how to save Emma. Poor thing, such an old fashioned name and now she'll have those ugly fangs too." Cordelia walked into Wes's office like she had been there all along. The silence that greeted her was almost laughable. "What is it with you people? I mean, here I was in a coma, not able to talk. Now that I can, everyone else looks comatose." Wes and Fred rushed her, hugging her. Giles stood and smiled in her direction. "Oh my god, Giles, you look so much older than the last time I saw you, but still all English." "Cordelia, it is a pleasure to see you up and well." "Yeah, you're just wishing I wasn't talking so much, huh?" He just smiled. Questions flew until Gunn came in and everyone stopped to watch his reaction. No one was disappointed. Gunn grabbed her and lifted her up in a huge bear hug. "Girl, about time you woke your ass up!" "Ah, Gunn, Charles, could you put me down? I need to breathe." "Oh, right. You look good!" "Of course I do. I had a whole lot of beauty sleep, enough so that I won't have to worry for years." There were a few chuckles and then Cordy looked around the room. "So, where's, Lorne? Get him here now. Also, it's time we got to work to solve this situation Angel got us into." Fred called the hotel and filled Lorne in on Cordy's arrival. Hanging up, she told them all that he was on the way. Gunn and then Wes filled Angel and Cordy in on what they had found. "Do you trust the Lurker to bring Emma back?" asked Angel "Not really; he is a demon. But with the firm, he doesn't have any leeway. He has to grant our request," replied Gunn. "Angel, you do realize, and especially now with Cordy back, that this Lurker is your chance to regain your soul without the happiness clause?" "We don't have much time. Emma is expected to rise in demon form come sunset tomorrow," supplied Fred. "Angel, you said Spike was here. Shouldn't he have some say in this? The last time I saw him he tortured you, but I think that soul of his may have changed the torture tendency in him," Cordy said. They all looked around, realizing the grieving vampire had disappeared. "Gunn, Wes, you two find him. Chances are he went after Dru and is maybe planning to eliminate Emma before…" Angel started. "Well, he needs to wait and let us help. Bring him back here if you have to hogtie him. Maybe you should go get your girlfriend, Wes; she may be able to help." Wes saw the smile on Angel's face when he spoke about Buffy and breathed a silent sigh of relief. He headed to Angel's office and the conference room. A Lurker demon was on its way to L.A. through the dimensions to speak with them. Spike hadn't said anything about whether or not he approved of the plan, and Angel didn't really care. Emma had died again because of him. Gunn had told him all the facts and Angel was torn. With Cordelia in the picture, a true and permanent soul would be a good thing. He sat in his desk chair in the dark, trying to make what was probably his most difficult choice. Cordy came in and groaned. "In the dark again? I thought you were getting over that, big boy." He saw her smile as she switched on the light and the decision grew harder. "Lorne could have you sing." " No, I've got to do this without the help." "Always wanting to do it on your own. Angel, sweetie, talk to me. Let me help that way." "It's hard, Cordy. I mean, with you here, I want to lose that whole perfect happiness thing and then we could, well, you know." "Yeah, sounds nice, but would you really ever be happy? What do you think someone else would do in your place? Say Spike?" "You would have to bring him up." "Seems like the thing, since she was his lover, don't you think?" "I don't know if he'd give up a chance for complete happiness for me." "Yes you do." Angel sat back and sighed. She was right. Spike had already done it for him and Fred. Angel also thought about how he had made Spike what he had been and how Spike himself had changed that. He knew then that he had to give him something, and this would be it. "Yeah, you're right. It should have been easier to see it though." "Vampire or not, Angel, that soul still makes you human and on the whole we humans or part humans can be self-serving." "Ok, let's get the others and make this happen." * * * * * Wes got to the conference room and saw the remainder of the map Willow had used for the locator spell. Both she and Buffy were gone. Now he and Gunn would have to hunt them down too. Studying the map, he saw the burn marks and knew which direction to start looking. He headed to his office and filled the others in. Fred stayed behind to talk with the Lurker and Wes, Giles, and Gunn gathered weapons and headed out. TBC