Disclaimer: Not mine, not mine, no permission, no money, lalalala, you know the drill. Quit frittering around and get to the good shtuff.

Reportus Secundus, by Everett.

I just want to say that this is not fair.

I wrote my report, didn't I? I handed it in in plenty of time and you know it, Miss Frost. It's not MY fault it got lost before you marked it. I shouldn't be victimised by having to write another one.

So what if I was the one who led the kittens on a mad chase through your office and that's when it was lost? You TOLD me to keep them busy.

Okay, okay. I love being a cat. I think it is a good thing that we are all cats. I feel happy and secure in myself now that I am a cat.

There.

Done.

Sighhhhhhhh. Detail? Fine.

I have to admit, it came as kind of a shock at first. A BIG shock. Once I got used to it, though, it was a lot of fun. I like looking after the kittens, and playing with them, and washing them, and letting them pounce on my tail - well, that isn't so much fun, but never mind. I like kids. But you already knew that.

What is my absolute favourite thing about being a cat? Let's see... I could say it's the way we've all gotten closer...or how everyone's calmed down and quit angsting all over the place...or the freedom inherent in the catform...I doubt anyone'd believe it's the hairballs... But I'd be lying. Those things are all great (except for the hairballs), but they aren't my favourite thing. Actually, they're a lot more dignified, but I'm supposed to be honest here.

My favourite thing about being a cat is my tail.

I know it's silly, but I really love that furry little thing hanging off the end of my spine. It's a toy, a nose-warmer, a mood-indicator, a pillow, and a friend. Seriously, it has a personality of its own. You can tell by the way it will never let me catch it, no matter how much I want to. I can wrap it around me when I snooze, or around my feet when I want to look dignified. With it, I can be happy, sad, or grumpy without saying a word, and everyone knows about it.

It's a very good tail, too. It's long, and straight, with thick fur. It's the second longest of all of us, and Mr Cassidy's an awful lot bigger than I am, so I don't think it counts. I admit, it doesn't have stripes on it like Ange's does, or an orange tip like Jubilee's, but those would look silly on a black-and-white anyway.

I do wish the kittens didn't like it quite so much, though.

I know I'm talking about it a lot, but it's really the most important change in my life. Well...except for that other thing.

* * *

Jubilee whimpered and opened her eyes. The last thing she remembered was trying to get Ev to wake up, and a huge dog coming after her - then everything had gone black. She blinked a couple of times, focusing a little blearily on a white ceiling. White? Then she remembered where they were supposed to be. Turning her head, she saw Moira and Shadowcat standing next to her.

"Hi." She whispered in an alarmingly weak voice. "Where're the others?"

"Dinnae worry, lass. Everyone's fine, or will be soon." Moira said reassuringly. Shadowcat nodded and took her NLS's hand (NLS - Nearly Little Sister), squeezing gently. "You and Miss Frost were the only ones who were really hurt. Her wrist got torn up pretty bad, and you've got a concussion, but you should both be okay soon."

"Wha' 'bout Ev?"

"Just momentarily stunned. He's up already, and fair worried about the two o' ye." Moira smiled. "Would ye like tae see him?" Jubilee nodded, and winced. Moving the head obviously wasn't a good idea.

Moira went to the door, and leaned out, talking to someone outside. Kitty kissed Jubilee's forehead, and got up. "Now that you're awake, I have to go talk to Pete. I sort of owe him an apology." She squeezed past Moira, who was now barring the door, refusing access to the crowd outside.

"Get back, ye heathens! A said two o' ye, an' A meant it. Everett and...Penny? In ye go then." She stepped back to let them in, then left, closing the door behind her.

Penny, in cat form, was the first to reach the bed. ~Hurt?~ she mewed worriedly, sniffing at Jubilee for pain/fear scent.

"Not really, s'fine, Pen. My head hurts a little bit, but nothing major. Are you okay?" Jubilee stroked the tiny red-brown scrap of fluff.

~Yes. Hid kittens in dustbin, away from dogs.~ Penny said proudly. ~By self.~

"Good f'r you. Knew I could count on ya." Penny purred, and Jubilee looked up at Everett shyly as he approached the bed. "A-are ya okay, Ev? Ya got hit pretty hard... Not that I was worried or nothin'."

"Yeah, J, I'm fine. How's your head?" There was a funny look on Ev's face.

"Not too bad. You know me, hardest noggin in the school."

"Yeah...Penny, can I talk to Jubilee alone for a minute?" Penny looked puzzled, but nodded, and Ev opened the door to let her out. Then he turned back to Jubilee. "Are you insane?!?!" He was speaking softly, but so intensely that she could almost feel the bed shaking. He crossed the room in two strides, and grabbed her shoulders. "That dog could have killed you! What were you thinking going up against it by yourself like that?!?"

Jubilee's eyes filled with tears. Why was he mad at her? "I was tryin' ta look out for you, dumbo! It had ya down, and I was scared -"

"You were scared? I opened my eyes and saw you going up against something that could have eaten you in one bite! I've never been so terrified in my life!" He let go of her shoulders and sat down on the bed, taking one of her hands in both of his. "And then you got knocked into that wall, and you didn't move... The world was still going round and round, but I managed to get a swipe in, just trying to get it away from you. I just kept hinking, what if you were hurt, what if it was bad?" She was stunned to realise that there were tears in his eyes. "I was just so scared..." he trailed off.

Jubilee didn't hesitate. She knew that if she did, she would lose her nerve, and she'd never get another chance like this. She sat up, her head reeling, and hugged him fiercely. "I know. But I couldn't let it hurt ya, Ev. If it'd been someone else, maybe I'd have waited and coordinated the attack properly, but you're too important to me." She looked up at him, waiting. It was his move. The moment lengthened and she started to pull away.

Then Ev leaned forwards, and kissed her very gently. "I'm still scared, J. I've never felt this way about anyone before." he whispered.

"Me neither. I...I love ya, Ev."

"I love you too, J." He kissed her a bit more thoroughly this time. "Do you think this is why Miss Frost's been grinning at us when she thinks we aren't looking?"

"Probably." Jubilee snuggled into his arms. It felt very nice. "Let's put dye in her shampoo for not telling us."

* * *

I'll admit, there are bad things bout being a cat. Dogs, burrs, cars, dogs, other toms, dogs, and the Pound. Oh yeah, and dogs. Do you remember the time Jono wandered off outside the grounds and disappeared and eventually turned up at the pound? He was SO embarrassed. But he had a point. I'm not too keen on having a collar on either. I'm not really into that sort of thing.

I had an idea, though. I was reading this old book, and this girl had a dog that had a little silver chain around its neck with a tag on it, instead of a collar. Maybe we should do that. It wouldn't be too annoying, and it's a bit more dignified than a red collar with a bell on it.

I hope you appreciate how hard it's been to write this. Artie keeps chasing my pen. Serves me right for using the one with Tweety on the end, I guess. Leech is asleep on my foot, but he keeps dreaming and scratching me in his sleep. His claws aren't too serious yet, though, so it doesn't really hurt. Much.

He just woke up, and they both think they're dying of hunger. I'm going to get them a snack.

Everett Thomas.