Under the Sun

Author: enigmaticblue

Rating: PG-13

Archive: Sure, if you already have my stuff. If not, just ask.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters herein; Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and other lucky folks do. Of course, I'm not the one making money off of them.

Summary: Set after Avocation in an alternate S4 where many events of canon get thrown out the window. This one won't make any sense if you haven't read the previous story.

A/N: The title comes from Ecclesiastes, which most people know from the phrase, "A time for everything, and a season for everything under heaven." Really, this story is based on the entire book, which is probably my favorite in the Bible. It talks about making the most of what one has now, and while some find it depressing, I love it. If you've got the time, I'd really recommend you read the whole thing.

Chapter 48

"I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,/or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off./I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,/in secret, between the shadow and the soul./I love you as the plant that never blooms/but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;/thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,/risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body./I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where./I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;/so I love you because I know no other way/than this: where I does not exist, nor you,/so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,/so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep." ~Pablo Neruda, "Sonnet XVII"

Spike ran down the hallway towards the cyborg, watching as Buffy hooked one of her legs over Adam's arm, and caught his chin with her boot. Adam didn't loosen his grip, but the blow served as enough of a distraction that Spike was able to plunge a hand into Adam's side with a straight fingered blow.

Adam dropped Buffy immediately to turn on Spike, who caught the punch that the cyborg threw. "Think you can mess with my girl?" Spike asked with a sneer. "Think again."

"You will not stop me," Adam said. "There must be more."

"More what?" Buffy asked hoarsely, still trying to catch her breath.

"More like me," Adam replied, his eyes glittering. "I will make an army, just like mother wanted."

"Knowing your mother, I don't blame you for killing her," Spike said. "'Course, that just means we're going to have to kill you, since she didn't give you the proper discipline."

Adam offered a grimace that was probably supposed to pass for a smile. "I feel no pain. There is nothing you can do to me."

"Is that right?" Spike asked. Moving as quickly as only a supernaturally enhanced vampire could, he pulled Buffy to his chest and flew the few steps to the first door he came to, hitting it with his shoulder and back in order to prevent her from being harmed.

The concussion from the explosion hit almost immediately, and Spike could feel the heat on his boots and his back. He met Buffy's eyes and knew that she understood his plan; the unspoken communication passed between them easily, and Spike scrambled to his feet with a little help from the Slayer.

Adam was lying in the hallway, the walls bearing the scorch marks from the blast, and the ceiling tiles beginning to fall. The creature was starting to stir, and Spike knew that they only had moments to complete their mission.

Spike seized Adam's shoulders, holding him against the ground, and Spike felt the cyborg begin to struggle against his grip, although Adam wasn't moving all that well. "Buffy! Now!"

She didn't have to be told twice; the Slayer plunged her hand into Adam's chest, staring down into the creature's eyes. "This is for Faith," she said as she pulled out his power core.

Spike could have sworn he saw relief flit over Adam's features before he became still for good.

"Spike? Buffy?" Wesley's voice called down the darkened hallway, and the beam of his flashlight waved wildly and then steadied, hitting Adam's body.

"We're fine, Wes," Buffy called. "It's done. We just have to get out of here."

The lights began to flicker, and the intact fluorescent lights down at the end of the hall came back on. "Looks like the electric company worked around Willow's hack job," Spike commented, standing up and offering a hand to Buffy. "How's your throat, luv?"

"Sore, but I'll live." Buffy gave him a sheepish look. "I know you told me to wait, but..."

Spike sighed. "Yeah, but I didn't actually think you would. What happened?"

"I was looking for a hiding spot for us, and Adam saw me," Buffy admitted. "He had Walsh in there, and I think he was trying to—you know."

"Think I do," Spike replied. He met Riley's eyes and said grudgingly, "Nice shooting."

"It was my pleasure," Riley replied. "You ready to get out of here?" he asked, directing the question to Buffy.

"It can't happen too soon," she said fervently.

~~~~~

Getting out of the Initiative wasn't nearly as difficult as they'd thought it would be; their small team grew slightly as it picked up the knots of remaining soldiers on their way out, providing them with a little more in the way of cover. Buffy felt bad for those left behind—except maybe for Forrest. She could tell that the number making it out was significantly fewer than those she'd seen fighting on the way in. She knew that most of the dead had been like Riley—well-meaning, idealistic, and fighting for something that didn't exist.

The Initiative had never been what it claimed to be; its true face was found in Adam.

Still, that wasn't their fault, and even if Buffy couldn't feel much sympathy for the dead soldiers, she knew that many of them probably had families that would miss them. There were always more victims than just the dead.

By the time they all spilled out into the hallways of Lowell House, Buffy was exhausted, her only desire to sleep for a week—preferably alongside Spike.

"You guys should get out of here," Riley said once they were clear of the elevator; it was apparently a lot easier to go up with unauthorized personnel than it was to go down.

"Are you sure?" Buffy asked.

Riley nodded. "It'll be easier if I can keep your name out of it. With everything those in charge are going to see down there, it probably won't be too difficult to convince them that the Slayer was just a figment of the Professor's imagination. I don't think the guys will argue with me."

"Gonna take all the credit?" Spike asked, though his tone was more interested than angry.

Riley smiled. "You bet. At least, we will." He motioned to Graham and, by extension, the rest of the soldiers. "I'll let you know what's going to happen to this place; I owe you that much."

Buffy gave him a weary smile. "We'll see you later, then." As they made their way out of the house, she gave a limping Wesley a concerned look. "You okay?"

"I twisted my knee at some point," Wesley replied. "I'm sure it's fine, though."

"We'll get you off your feet as quick as we can, mate," Spike said. "You did good in there today."

Wesley shrugged. "I did what had to be done."

Spike nodded. "Yeah. Suppose we all did."

"Wesley!" Willow came dashing up as soon as they were in the doorway. "Are you okay?" She looked at Spike and Buffy, obviously not knowing who to go to first.

"We're all fine, Will," Buffy assured her. She met Giles' eyes, and she could see that he'd been just as worried. "Really, we're all okay, and Adam's gone."

He gave her a relieved smile. "Well done."

Buffy suddenly noticed the bodies of half a dozen demons littering the lawn. "I guess you guys had some trouble?"

Xander shrugged. "Nothing we couldn't handle."

She laughed, leaning back against Spike, and for the first time in a long time, felt as though worry wasn't her constant companion.

~~~~~

Joyce met them as they came through the door, her eyes searching each for signs of injuries. It appeared as though everyone was fine, although Wesley was limping a bit and Xander had a scrape across one cheek. Giles gave her a smile and a slight nod, and Buffy met her with a hug. "It's okay, Mom."

She gave a sigh of relief. "Is anyone hungry?" Joyce asked.

"Starving," several people said at once.

"I'll call for pizza." Joyce turned to go into the kitchen where she'd left the phone, unsurprised when Giles followed her. "How did it go?"

"About as well as could be expected," Giles responded, pulling her into his arms for a much-needed embrace. "At least we didn't take any losses."

Joyce leaned her head on his shoulder. "But there were losses."

"There always are," he replied softly. "Riley and Graham are going to talk to those in charge; with luck, they'll say the right thing to convince them that the Initiative ought to be shut down."

"Do you really think they will?" she asked hopefully.

"I think that there's a good possibility that the dead bodies will do it for them." Giles pressed a kiss to her forehead. "It's going to be fine."

Joyce believed him, although she couldn't help but wonder if he would say the same when he heard her news.

~~~~~

Buffy straightened her black dress, hating that she had to do this. She hated funerals; they only served as a reminder of her own ending, particularly when it was a Slayer's funeral she was attending.

One of Giles' friends in the Council had told him that the new Slayer had been located in Germany, and that she would be staying there; apparently, she had been training for years, and was well-versed in the standard Council rhetoric.

Buffy had to wonder how long she'd last.

"You ready to go?"

She turned to see Spike standing in the doorway of what was effectively 'their' bedroom these days. The school year was almost over, and Buffy wasn't planning on moving back into the dorms the next year; there was no point, when Spike had a nice place that wasn't too far away.

Spike was wearing a suit and dark tie, which Buffy hadn't known he owned. He looked good, but Buffy wished that he were wearing his standard jeans and t-shirt, because this was just one more reminder that this day was out of the ordinary.

"Yeah." Buffy tried for a smile, but couldn't quite make it.

Spike put his hands on her shoulders, his thumbs rubbing her tense muscles in soothing circles. "I know, luv."

"I don't want to do this," she confessed.

"Me neither," he agreed.

She leaned her head against his chest. "We have to go, though."

"We do." Spike pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Come on; we don't want to be late."

Buffy thought that the gathering by Faith's grave was pitifully small; only her mother and Giles, Xander and Anya—who didn't quite understand what it was all about—Tara, Willow, Oz, and Wesley. Buffy was a little surprised that Wesley had agreed to attend, given the fact that Faith had tortured him for a few hours; she wondered briefly if it had something to do with knowing for certain that the other Slayer was dead and buried, but that seemed a little harsh for Wes.

The preacher was the only outsider there, and he spoke the ritual words of the funeral service in a measured, solemn voice, talking about youth cut short. He didn't know about Faith's past, only that she had been murdered. Maybe it was better that way, because there was no hypocrisy in his voice when he talked about the tragedy that her death had been.

Of course, Faith's death was a tragedy, because she would never have a chance to do better for herself; Buffy wondered if she ever really would have had a chance.

When the minister stepped back from the grave to give them a chance to say a few words, Buffy watched as Giles stepped forward first to throw a rose on top of the coffin, though he didn't say anything.

The others came forward one by one to throw in a flower or a handful of dirt, although no one spoke. Spike went just before her. "Wish we could have saved you, Faith," he said, tossing in a rose.

Buffy followed him. "Goodbye, Faith," she whispered. "I'm sorry."

And then it was time to go home.

~~~~~

"I have to go."

Willow had known this was coming since the day she'd seen Oz again, if she was to be honest with herself. She stood in her dorm, in nearly the same spot she'd been when he'd first shown up again. "I know. Where will you go?"

He gave a quick shake of his head. "I don't know. There are a lot of places I haven't seen yet."

Willow took a deep breath. "Yeah. There are a lot of places in the world to see."

"I shouldn't have come back," Oz said. "It was stupid to think that you'd be—"

"Waiting?" Willow asked. "I tried. I waited, and then..."

"There was Wesley." Oz studied the tops of his shoes.

"Pretty much." Willow choked back the tears. "I wrote you letters—so many letters—but I didn't have anywhere to send them."

He nodded, looking away. "I know. I—I'm sorry."

"I know." Willow tried for a smile. "If you ever feel like passing through this part of the world again, I'll probably be here."

He nodded. "Maybe so."

She hugged him, the scent that was uniquely Oz filling her nostrils. Willow remembered how safe Oz's arms had made her feel, and it hurt that they no longer let her feel safe, only sad, like she'd lost some vital piece of herself.

Willow waited until the door had closed behind him, the spot on her forehead burning where his lips had brushed her skin, before bursting into tears. Oz had been her best friend, her first lover, her first love, and his loss—permanent and irreplaceable—hurt like nothing else ever had. As much as she loved Wesley, it still hurt.

She was still fighting the tears a couple of hours later when Buffy came back after her first final. "Will?"

"Oz is gone."

"Oh." Buffy immediately sat down on the bed next to her, pulling her into a hug. "I'm so sorry."

"I knew he wasn't going to stay, you know?" Willow said. "And I love Wesley; I didn't think I was going to get back together with Oz or anything. It's just—"

Buffy sighed. "I know. He was your first."

Willow nodded, putting her head on Buffy's shoulder, mourning both the ending and the new beginning. No one had ever told her how much new beginnings hurt, even when they represented something good.

~~~~~

"H'lo, pet."

Tara glanced up, surprised to see Spike standing next to the bench she was seated on. "Hi."

"Can I sit down?" he asked.

"Sure." Tara watched as he sat next to her, the sunlight nearly causing his blond hair to glow. "W-what are you doing on campus?"

"Meeting Buffy," Spike replied. "But she was busy with Willow when I showed up, so I thought I'd wander for a bit." He gave her a smile. "No danger in being here now."

Tara knew what he was referring to; Riley had come to talk to Buffy the previous day, letting her know that the army was closing the base, and that he was being transferred out. Apparently, the combination of the massacre of both soldiers and demons, the discovery that Walsh had violated the soldiers by feeding them highly experimental drugs, and the fact that one of the soldiers in question had been a general's grandson had led them to call the experiment a failure.

Later, after Riley had left, Spike had opined that one of his demon friends might also have had something to do with it, since Robert had been pressuring some highly placed friends to make sure the Initiative went away.

It was still odd for Tara to hear Spike talk about demons as though they were people, rather than the evil creatures her father had always said that they were. Had always told her that she would someday be.

Tara had always thought that her escape from her family would be temporary, only until the demon came out. Once that happened, she would be forced to go where she wouldn't hurt anyone. At least, that's what she'd thought until she'd met Willow and Wesley and the others. The fact that Spike was a demon didn't hurt, either.

"It's good that we don't have to worry about them anymore," Tara said.

"S'pose it is," Spike agreed. "What about you? You doing okay now?"

"S-sure," Tara said, not knowing what he was getting at.

Spike shrugged. "Sometimes that first apocalypse will show a person that maybe this isn't what they want." He gave her a reassuring smile. "Not that we don't want you; just want to know that you're okay with it all."

"More than okay," she said. "It's been..." Tara couldn't explain what it had been.

"You do know that you're one of us now, right?" Spike asked. "Stop an apocalypse, and you're one of the family."

Tara could feel herself blushing. "I—"

"It's the way it works," Spike said firmly. "Remind me to let you know when we go down to L.A.; I'll introduce you to my friend Robert. Good man."

Tara swallowed. "I-is that the one that's half demon?"

"Not sure of the exact fraction," Spike replied, "but yeah. Doesn't matter what you are, pet. Just what you do." He touched her shoulder. "Remember that."

As he ambled away, Tara wondered if he knew.

~~~~~

Xander kept watch on the doors of the Bronze, anxiously awaiting Anya's arrival; she was supposed to be off work soon. She'd heard about Giles wanting someone to watch the bookstore for him on occasion and had jumped at the chance, and Xander was grateful that she had something to do now that he was working full time at the construction site; it made it less likely that she'd make a fuss when he wanted to spend time with his friends.

He thought that they might have finally reached an agreement about his desire to help Buffy and the others. As long as he didn't get hurt or killed, and saved plenty of time to give her orgasms, Anya was willing to share him. Xander, for his part, had every intention of keeping her happy.

It was more than the fact that Anya seemed to be the only one who would have him, more than the fact that she was pretty and good in bed. More than the fact that she was the one really good thing in his life.

Xander had finally realized that he loved her. The others might think he was crazy for it, but he did.

He felt a smile start to form as she entered the Bronze, and Xander waved at her. "Hey."

"Hi!" Anya said brightly. "Giles said that today was our highest grossing day of the week, and I got to count the drawer."

Xander smiled indulgently. "That's great, An. I take it today was a good day."

"A very good day," she confirmed. "Or it will be if you come home with me and give me celebratory orgasms."

Xander hesitated, looking around the Bronze for the others. Spike and Buffy hadn't arrived yet, but Wesley, Willow, and Tara were already there somewhere.

"Go," Tara said, suddenly appearing at his elbow. "I'll tell the others where you went."

"Thanks, Tara," Xander said gratefully, knowing that this was one of those compromises a guy had to make for his girl. "Tell Buffy that I'll see her before she takes off."

Xander turned to Anya. "Let's go."

He had a girlfriend to make happy.

~~~~~

Giles swallowed hard. "Are you sure?"

"As certain as I can be before going to the doctor," Joyce replied. "I might have thought that it was just menopause, but..." She trailed off as she realized that Giles was looking very uncomfortable at the discussion of female organs.

Which was just silly, since he had no trouble enjoying female organs.

He leaned back in his chair. "What—what are we going to do?"

"That depends on what you want to do," Joyce said evenly, hiding her disappointment. She'd hoped that he'd be excited, although she'd expected disbelief and shock. "Did you not want children?"

"It wasn't something I'd thought about," Giles replied honestly. "I hadn't thought it possible, and now..." Shock was giving way to something akin to acceptance, and maybe even excitement. "Did you want more children?"

"I think I felt the same way you did," Joyce said. "I didn't think it was possible, so..." She sighed. "Hank and I had talked about having another child, but it was never the right time, and then there was no time."

Giles nodded slowly. "I had probably best give up the apartment, then. I think it's time to get rid of the security blanket, don't you think?" He gave her a cautious smile. "Unless you want to kick me out."

"Hardly," Joyce said. "But are you really okay with this?"

"It's going to take some time to get used to the idea," Giles said. "And I'll probably panic at least once when it finally does sink in, but yes." His smile broadened to a grin, and he suddenly laughed. "I'm going to be a father."

Joyce laughed with him. "Yes, you are."

~~~~~

Willow shifted, trying to find a spot on Wesley's couch where the springs wouldn't poke her; she really did need to convince him to get some new furniture.

"You were quiet tonight," Wesley commented.

Willow looked at him, distracted. "Huh?" They had gone out for dinner, and were at his place, trying to have a date. Willow knew she had been lost in her own thoughts for most of the evening, however.

"Are you alright?" Wesley asked. "Did I do something?"

"No," Willow said quickly. "No, it's not you. I'm just not very good company tonight."

Wesley hesitated and then asked, "Do you want to go back to your house tonight? I could drive you."

"No," Willow said firmly. "I don't want to go home, but..." She gave him a pleading look. "Could we go for a drive?"

He frowned. "On the motorcycle?"

She nodded. "I just—I need to get out of here tonight."

"Okay." Wesley didn't ask any more questions; he simply handed Willow her helmet and led the way to his bike.

Willow wondered how he'd known to take the coast road, that she'd wanted to feel the wind rushing over them. She felt the heat of the bike and the road and his body, the strong muscles of his back and thighs. Tonight, Willow needed to feel safe; she needed to be reminded that she had everything she wanted right here—with him.

Wesley stopped the bike at a scenic overlook, and they took off their helmets and sat at the cliff's edge, their feet dangling. The silence hung between them, thick as the darkness and the stars overhead.

"I love you."

He turned to look at her, and a gentle smile lit his face. "I love you, too."

"I just thought you needed to know that," Willow added.

Wesley chuckled. She loved that sound. "It's always nice to hear."

"Maybe we could go somewhere this summer, too," Willow suggested. "After Spike and Buffy get back."

Wesley nodded. "We can do that."

"You don't mind that I'm going to share a room with Tara next year, do you?" she asked suddenly, anxiously. "I mean, I know that Buffy's moving in with Spike, and I didn't know if you were wondering why I wasn't moving in with you, and—"

Wesley stopped her with a finger to her lips. "Spike and Buffy have been dating for much longer that we've been dating, and Tara needs someone to share expenses with her." He smiled, obviously amused. "It's fine, Willow."

"Oh."

"Is that what had you so worried?"

"Some of it," she admitted.

"Next time, just talk to me," Wesley said.

Of course, there really wasn't much talking after that.

~~~~~

Buffy finished packing and zipped her suitcase shut. "Okay, I think that's all of it."

"Are you sure you're only packing for two weeks and not two months?" Spike asked.

"Shut up," she ordered him. "You don't know what kind of clothes I'm going to need."

Spike just smirked, laying back on the bed, watching as Buffy rushed around getting the last few things together for their trip to Europe. They were flying into London first, then heading to Paris, and he'd promised that they would see more the next time they went.

There would be a next time, and he was unspeakably grateful for that fact.

Buffy suddenly stopped in her preparations. "I still can't believe that Mom's going to have a baby."

Spike snickered; he couldn't help it. Buffy had been making comments like that for the last two days, ever since Joyce had given them the news. "I guess it makes it real."

"It makes what real?" Buffy asked.

"The fact that your mum and Rupert are shagging."

Spike wasn't terribly surprised when she hit him with a pillow. "Stop it!" He just laughed as Buffy continued to smack him with her makeshift weapon, finally grabbing her wrists and wrestling her to the bed. She lay panting and breathless under him, her face flushed with laughter, and Spike thought that she'd never looked more beautiful.

"I love you."

"I love you, too." Buffy sighed as Spike rolled over, stretching out next to her. "It's just that I've always been an only child, you know? It's weird. Besides, Mom is old."

"I'm older," Spike pointed out.

She pouted. "That's so not the point. Besides, you're a different kind of old."

Spike smiled indulgently. "If you say so."

Buffy snuggled up next to him. "I guess it means I'm kind of related to Giles now. That's not so bad."

Spike had to think a moment before he could follow her thought process, realizing that she meant they'd share a blood-relation, which did connect them in an attenuated sense. Not that he was going to point that out. "Figure you'll be related in more than just blood before the year is out."

Buffy frowned, and then her eyes widened. "You think they'll get married?"

"No reason why they wouldn't, and a couple why they would," Spike pointed out. "I don't think they'll be in a hurry, but I imagine it'll happen sooner or later."

"I'd like that," Buffy decided. "It'll be nice to know that someone will be looking after Mom."

Spike tugged her closer at the reminder that she wasn't going to be around forever. "You'll be there to do it for a long time to come, luv."

Buffy didn't respond verbally, instead slinging an arm over his middle, snuggling down on the bed next to him. "How long before we have to leave?"

"Few hours yet, luv," Spike said. "There's time for you to take a nap."

"Thank you," Buffy murmured, fighting sleep.

Spike frowned. "For what?"

"For this. For sticking around, for loving me." Buffy listed off the reasons one after another and followed it up with a long kiss. "It makes it all worth it, you know?"

"Yeah," Spike said quietly. "Wouldn't give this up for anything, Buffy."

He was beyond grateful that this last year had only strengthened what they felt for each other, rather than tearing them apart. Whatever the future might bring, there was nothing that could destroy their love.

Spike thought that he just might be the luckiest man in the world; he had everything under the sun.