Traveling Light

Author: enigmaticblue

Rating: PG

Archive: If you already have my stuff, feel free. If not, just ask.

Disclaimer: The characters all belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and others with a lot more money than I have. So don't sue. Please?

Summary: Dawn is a girl on a mission.

A/N: Written for curiouswombat's birthday. I hope you enjoy.

When Dawn heard the news, she knew what she had to do. Giles had been the one to call them. He had admitted—reluctantly—that he'd been wrong about Angel and his crew, and that Spike had been back for quite some time. It seemed that Angel had managed to take out more than half of the members of the Black Thorn, shutting down the L.A. branch of Wolfram & Hart and throwing the forces of evil into chaos.

Spike and Angel had somehow managed to decimate the demon army that the Senior Partners sent after them, although no one was quite sure how. Angel was still in L.A., but Spike's whereabouts were unknown.

Giles didn't have any more information than that, but Dawn had seen the look on her sister's face. Spike was alive, or at least in existence, and no one had informed her. Including the vampire himself.

Dawn was just grateful that Buffy had finally dumped the Immortal. He had been arrogant, vain, and altogether too perfect for Dawn's taste. He also tended not to talk to her unless he wanted something from Buffy and decided that going through Dawn would be the best way to get it.

Of course, that was only after Dawn had turned him down when he hit on her. The jerk.

The only way Dawn could explain Buffy's involvement with the Immortal was that she had been dazzled by his admittedly formidable charm. When Buffy found him sleeping with another woman, however, she'd tossed him out bodily and told him not to come back. Then, she had thrown herself back into slaying and traveling, asking Giles for as many jobs as he could give her.

Dawn was worried about her sister. She was planning on heading off to university in the fall, specifically Oxford. The Council had pulled some strings for her, and she was planning on studying languages, and on becoming a Watcher. Giles had been supportive of the plan, even if Buffy had been less than enthusiastic. Dawn got the sense that her sister wanted her out of the slaying business, but Dawn liked it. She didn't see how she could pursue a "normal" life after everything she'd seen and done.

Her major concern at this point was Buffy, whom she was certain was still mourning Spike, and yet was too mad to do anything about him not being dead. Buffy needed someone to look after her when Dawn was away, and Spike was the perfect guy for the job.

Assuming he wanted the job. Since he hadn't shown up, even after he and Angel had kicked all the demons out of L.A., Dawn wasn't sure that he did. Want to be with Buffy, that is. Of course, Dawn had first-hand experience of how stupid Buffy and Spike could be when it came to their relationship, so it could be that Spike had some idiotic notion that Buffy didn't want him. Just like Buffy now had the notion that Spike didn't want her.

It wasn't just for her sister's sake that Dawn wanted to find Spike. She hadn't had the chance to repair their relationship before he'd sacrificed himself. She wanted to see him, to say hello, to tell him that she was sorry for not talking to him for months.

Dawn wasn't sorry she'd threatened to set him on fire, because she'd meant that. But she regretted not letting him know that she'd seen him change, and that she was proud of what he'd accomplished.

Finding Spike wasn't easy, however. No one knew where he was. Angel had gotten in touch with Giles to let him know that Wesley had died in battle, but that was about it. Dawn had no idea whether or not Angel would know Spike's location, but she figured that was the best place to start.

All Angel knew was that Spike had decided to go to Europe, but he wasn't sure where. "Sorry, Dawn," he'd said, not sounding sorry at all. "Spike and I aren't close."

"Will you at least let me know if he does contact you?" Dawn asked.

She could almost hear Angel shrug over the line. "I'll let him know you're looking for him, but I don't know that Spike really wants to be found." He wouldn't say anymore than that.

"Damn," Dawn muttered after she got off the phone with him. A locator spell would be useless without something of Spike's to key it into his essence, and they'd made it out of Sunnydale with the clothes on their backs and nothing more. It was highly unlikely that Buffy would have anything of the vampire's that Dawn could use to do the spell.

She sighed, wondering if this was going to work after all. Surely Spike would have come to Rome if he wanted to see them. He certainly hadn't been shy about showing up in Sunnydale, even when he knew he wasn't welcome. Spike had to know that they would be happy to see him.

Or did he?

Dawn let her head flop back against the couch as she thought things over. She had convinced Buffy to let her do some traveling on her own through Europe over the summer. The Slayer had been hesitant, but then had acquiesced when Dawn pointed out that Buffy was traveling a lot more for the Council these days and was rarely home anyway. Dawn had the money that Giles had given her for graduation, and the Council was going to be paying her way through college—they really did need Watchers badly—so she had the summer to do what she wanted.

What Dawn wanted was to find Spike, drag him back to Rome, and then lock him in a room with Buffy. If things didn't work out after that, fine, but at least they would both know. And Dawn was really tired of watching her sister mope.

The trouble, of course, was in finding Spike, because she didn't have the first clue of where to look.

She thought about it for a moment longer, and then called Willow. "Can you do a locator spell for me?"

Dawn could see Willow frowning in her mind. "Who do you need to locate?" she asked.

"Spike."

Willow made a humming sound. "I don't know, Dawnie. Don't you think Spike would have contacted us if he wanted to be found?"

"No, I don't," Dawn replied. "Giles wouldn't help Angel with his grand plan to rid the world of evil that nearly worked. My best guess is that Spike thinks we don't care."

"Yeah," Willow said slowly, acknowledging Dawn's point. "I suppose that could be true. You aren't thinking about setting Spike and Buffy up, are you?"

"I want to see Spike again for myself," Dawn said stubbornly, not mentioning that she had every intention of making sure that Spike and Buffy got some alone time together to sort themselves out. "We didn't part on the best of terms."

Willow sighed. "Okay, I'll see what I can do. I'm assuming that you don't want Buffy to know."

"Buffy's in London with Giles, talking about the new headquarters," Dawn replied. "And she knows I'm going to do some traveling this summer. Spike's somewhere in Europe. So Buffy knows everything she needs to know."

Willow laughed. "Alright, I'll try and locate Spike for you." There was a pause. "For what it's worth, I do understand, Dawn. When you find him, will you let Spike know that we all appreciated what he did?"

"I think I can pass along that message," Dawn replied, and then hung up. She smiled. Part one of the plan was now complete. She had complete faith in Willow's ability to find anyone, whether they wanted to be found or not. Now, all she had to do was figure out how to convince Spike to come back to Rome.

~~~~~

Spike couldn't have said why he felt it necessary to stay away from Rome. There was a part of him that wanted to show up on Buffy's doorstep, just to see what she had to say. Andrew had said that she'd moved on though, and Spike was honestly trying to do the same. It might have been easier if he'd had someone to take his mind off the Slayer. Angel had his wolf girl, who was proving to be just what he needed to keep him in line.

Spike smirked. Once Angel had hunted her down again, he'd had to grovel pretty good to get her to take him back. Nina was a good girl, and Spike liked her quite a bit. She and the Great Poof would do okay together, if only because she wasn't afraid to chew on him a little.

There was no one like Nina in Spike's life, however, and he wasn't sure he wanted the distraction, in all honesty. The more Spike tried to move on, the more he realized that he was incapable of doing so. He loved Buffy, had gotten his soul for her, and he didn't know how you just stopped loving someone.

Or maybe he didn't want to get over her. Maybe he was turning into Angel, always brooding about what he didn't have. Spike snorted. If that was the case, it was probably better to dust himself now and save someone else the trouble.

Spike took a long draught of his beer and then pushed back from the table. It was getting late enough to start hunting, and that was what he was here for after all. He'd heard some rumors that there was a master vampire beginning to set up shop in Munich, and Spike hadn't been to Germany in quite a while. He spoke the language, and the beer was good. Spike had figured on coming, seeing if the rumors were true, cleaning out whatever vampires were there, and then moving on.

He always had liked a good fight. It was about all that kept him going these days.

She was standing in the doorway, looking right at him when he started towards the door. Spike was certain that he was seeing things at first. Maybe his mind was playing tricks on him, or he'd had more alcohol than he'd thought. Then Dawn smiled at him, and Spike knew she was real. No one could fake that smile.

"Hey."

She said it as if she was simply greeting a friend she'd seen yesterday, as though it hadn't been a year since he'd dusted in the Hellmouth, as though they'd been close right up to the end. Spike didn't know how to respond. All he could manage was to choke out her name, so great was his surprise. There was a beat. "What are you doin' here?"

"Looking for you, actually," she said cheerfully. "You're a hard man to find."

Spike stared at her. She'd grown up quite a bit in the last year. Tall, willowy, with her clothing and makeup marking her as a young sophisticate. He didn't know what to say. He had fantasized that Buffy might get it into her head to come after him, but not Dawn.

Spike didn't think they'd had anymore to say to one another.

"I, uh, do you want a drink or something?" he finally asked, not knowing what else to say. Spike would have known what to say to Buffy. They probably would have started arguing immediately over some damn thing. She'd be angry that he hadn't told her he was back. Spike would respond by telling her he'd wanted her to have what she always said she wanted, and then point out that the Immortal could warm her bed quite nicely. She would punch him for that, and then...

Well, that's about as far as Spike's imagination would take him. After that, he had no idea what would happen, since it depended on how Buffy felt about him, and whether Andrew had been right when he'd said that Buffy had moved on.

Dawn was a completely different story. Spike had no idea how to handle this meeting.

"Sure. I wouldn't mind a beer," she replied.

Spike was about to tell her that she wasn't old enough to drink, and then he remembered that they were in Germany, and she was old enough. How quickly time passed. "Any particular kind?"

"Surprise me," she suggested.

He went to get Dawn a drink and ordered another for himself while he was at it, looking over his shoulder. She was sitting at the same table he'd just vacated, and Spike wondered once again what she was doing here.

Spike set her stein down on the table, and then asked warily, "So how did you find me?"

"I asked Willow to do a locator spell," Dawn replied. "Well, actually, I called Angel first, but he said he didn't know where you were. He wasn't a lot of help. Then I called Willow. She figured out that you were in Munich, and so I came here. I've been asking around for you the past couple of days, and finally found the right hotel."

"Does your sister know where you are?" Spike asked, feeling hope flare in his chest. Maybe Buffy did care after all, even though he hated himself for hoping. He wanted to not care, because the disappointment wouldn't hurt quite so much that way.

Dawn shrugged. "She knows I'm in Munich, but she doesn't know you are. Oh, and Buffy doesn't know that I'm looking for you. I think she'd freak."

Spike winced. "Yeah. I'm sure."

"Why didn't you let us know you were back, Spike?" Dawn asked quietly.

He shrugged, finding it difficult to put his reasoning into words. "Couldn't at first," he replied. "I was a ghost when I first got brought back. Couldn't soddin' touch anything, so it wasn't like I could just pick up the phone and call." Spike looked away. "After that...dunno. Just never seemed like the right time, and when I found out Buffy was seein' that wanker, I reckoned there wasn't any point."

Dawn raised an eyebrow. "How did you know about the Immortal?" Since Buffy had only been seeing one guy since Sunnydale, Spike had to be referring to the Immortal.

Spike wouldn't quite meet her eyes. "Angel and I had to go to Rome for business. We dropped in. You an' Buffy were out, and Andrew told us that Buffy had moved on. Said we should do the same."

Dawn stared at him incredulously. "Wait a minute. Let me get this straight. You listened to Andrew for information on my sister's love life?"

When put that way, Spike could see why Dawn would look at him in disbelief. "Well, yeah, but..."

She rolled her eyes. "Spike, Buffy was insane to go out with the Immortal. That much is true. But it's called rebound, and no one is smart about the rebound guy."

Spike frowned. "Rebound from what?"

"From you, you dumb ass," Dawn said, exasperated. "Who do you think?"

Spike blinked. He was feeling a lot like someone had just hit him over the head—hard. Stunned. That was the word for it. "She meant it?" The question was meant to be rhetorical, but the girl knew immediately what he was referring to. Buffy had told her what she'd said in the Hellmouth, and what Spike's reply had been. Dawn had comforted her sister by telling her that Spike had probably just said what he did to get her out of there, not because he didn't believe that she loved him. It turned out she was wrong.

"Do you really think Buffy just says that kind of stuff without meaning it?" Dawn asked. "She doesn't even say the words to me all that often."

Spike shifted in his seat uncomfortably, realizing that he might have made a slight miscalculation. "Why now?" he finally asked. "Buffy could have looked for me herself."

Dawn snorted. "After you were back for a year and didn't tell her? Are we talking about the same person? She doesn't think you love her anymore."

Spike wasn't quite sure how to take that. In all honesty, he hadn't thought about how Buffy might react to finding out he hadn't told her he was back among the undead. He'd figured she would move on, and he'd thought she had, what with the no communication or attempt to find him. "Then why did you come looking for me?"

Dawn shrugged. "Easy. I leave for Oxford in the fall, and Buffy really needs somebody to look after her. I mean, I'm okay on my own, but I won't be around to sabotage bad boyfriend choices and make sure she eats and all that. Buffy needs looking after. I figured you were the best man for the job." She gave him a winsome smile that faded when she caught his expression, which was a mixture of anger and disappointment. "Spike, she loves you, and so do I. I think you guys would be good for each other."

Spike was caught by her tone, as it had grown wistful and uncertain. "You want me to come back to Rome with you?"

"I was planning on kidnapping you if you didn't come willingly," Dawn admitted candidly. "I just hadn't figured out how I was going to do it yet."

Spike started to laugh. "That right? Kidnapping me, huh? Wouldn't be the first time."

Dawn grinned at him, pleased that the tension had been broken. "Plus, I wanted to see you. Even if you didn't come back with me. We—we never really talked before, you know?"

"Yeah, I know," Spike replied, relaxing a bit. It felt good, knowing that Dawn had come looking for him because she wanted to see him, and not just because she wanted him to play bodyguard or nursemaid to the Slayer. Of course, he couldn't help but agree with the girl. Buffy did need looking after, and he didn't mind doing it so much, not if Buffy really did want him there. "'m sorry I wasn't there for you. Fell down on the job there."

"It wasn't all your fault," Dawn said. "That wasn't a good year for anybody."

"No, I don't suppose it was," Spike agreed. "Still, I wish I'd done things a bit differently. I have plenty of regrets, but that's right at the top of the list."

Dawn nodded. She knew all about regrets. She'd had the chance to become intimately acquainted with them in the last year. When people you knew and loved died, you had a tendency to go back over everything that had been said, to imagine all the things you could have said, all the things you could have done.

Dawn had wondered if Spike knew he was loved at his death. She had loved him for a long time now, even though she'd never said the words. It wasn't something they said to each other.

At least, it hadn't been.

Spike watched the emotions play over her face, and he could see the sadness there. "Hey," he said. "It's done, yeah? We'll just have to do things a bit differently from here on out."

"So you are coming back with me?" Dawn asked, feeling hopeful. Dawn wanted her family back together, and making sure that Spike and Buffy found each other again seemed the best place to start.

Spike sighed. He wondered when the bloody hell he'd ever be done being Love's bitch, and knew he never would. If that hadn't changed in over a hundred years, it wasn't going to change now. "Yeah, I suppose," he finally said. "Although, 'm not makin' you any promises. Buffy might decide I'm not the bloke she wants to have around."

Dawn gave him a sly grin. "Then maybe I'll decide to keep you."

A smile played around the corners of Spike's lips. "Yeah? Well, Miss Summers, I am always at your disposal. Although, right now, I have a nest to clean out before I can leave."

Dawn shrugged. "There's no hurry. Buffy won't be back in Rome for a week, and I've never been to Munich."

Spike stood up. "Where are you staying?"

"At a hostel," Dawn replied, "but I can move my stuff. I travel light."

Spike raised an eyebrow, and then laughed. "Yeah, then, let's get your stuff. We'll get you settled, I'll kill the vampires, and then we can go see the sights."

Dawn smirked. "No, we'll kill the vampires. I've fought uber-vamps. I think I can handle a few of the regular sort."

He gave her a hard look, and then realized that he wasn't going to talk her out of it. "You're goin' to follow me if I say no, aren't you?" When she grinned, Spike sighed, the sound of a man who was whipped and knew it. It was funny how good it felt. "Fine. Let's get your stuff moved, then."

Dawn took his arm, and Spike felt a warm glow. The coming days that had looked so barren only an hour before now seemed filled with hope. It looked like he would have company for his journey after all.