Subject: [OTL]: Famous Last Words 3/3 (GenX) by kaleko Date: Wed, 05 Sep 2001 03:06:48 -0400 From: kaleko kitty Famous Last Words 3/3 by kaleko Disclaimer in chapter 1. CHAPTER 3 +++ "But I'm gonna be fine. Right, mommy? I'll be fine..." Cail looked across the room at her mother, eyes full of tears. Emma nodded, lifelessly. "Mommy?" "You'll be fine, Cail," Emma said, assuringly."You'll be just fine." The past six months had been the best time of her life. She had never thought of herself as the motherly type, but she looked forward to her and Cail's reading sessions. She liked to hear Cail recite the new french phrase she'd learn everyday from the tv programs they'd watch together. She enjoyed watching as she attempted to play the piano, even though she sounded horrible. Emma thought of the first time she'd sat down at the piano, the terrible sound that had come out of it. Cail only smiled with happiness. She would wince everytime 2 o'clock came on Wednesday afternoon, when Cail would start her piano lessons. But she was determined to teach Cail how to play the piano, how to speak french, and how to read better than average. Cail had become a part of her daily life, and without her, what was she? Back to the same empty person she'd always been. She looked up into Cail's sad eyes, and over to Sean. Some decision had to be made, and none of the choices looked good. "She's not leaving this school," she said. "It would be for our best interest." "She is *not* leaving the school." "Listen to reason, Emma." "I am listening to reason. My reason. And I say she is not leaving this school and my reason is because I am her mother. And I say she is not-- not whatever you say she is, she is my daughter. Do you get that? Mine! Mine! And she will not leave this school, unless I give the permission." "Sean, please, talk some sense into--" "Must I repeat myself? *I* said she is not going to leave this school. No one else. Which means, in simple terms, you will have to go through me." Cail had been listening to Scott and Emma argue in the office for a few minutes, holding tightly to her mother's leg. She didn't really pay much attention to it. As long as her father and mother didn't shout, she was content. "Emma... Scott's right." "WHAT?" Cail winced at her mother's shout. Rogue approached, wrestling Cail from Emma's legs at Jean's telepathic command. The two had been sitting on the sidelines watching the argument for a bit, letting Scott handle things. It seemed as if Cail was just instigating things with her presence, so Jean had Rogue remove her. Emma didn't look pleased, but didn't stop the girl from being carried off. "Heyya, kiddo." Rogue sighed after they were well away from the office. "What're you up to?" "Nufin'," Cail answered quietly. "Well, you know what is the best thing to do when you're doing nothing?" The X-Men asked, sitting down onto the floor with a box she'd taken from Jubilee before carrying the girl off. "When I don't have anything to do, you know what I do? I do something!" She shook the box. "Let's see what I got for you in this box, okay?" "You got me somethin'?" Cail sniffed, eyeing the older woman with teary eyes. "But they say I've been bad." "Who did?" Rogue asked, appalled. "You don't look at all like someone who's bad..." She paused, watching the girl's reaction. "Maybe they mean you did bad things. Maybe because you wanted something. Lots of people do bad things when they want something they can't have. You know anything about that, Cail?" Her white streak of hair fell into her eyes, splitting the green orbs in half. Cail watched, focusing on the thing strands that made up the entire streak, and began to cry. "I wanted to belong." "I know," Rogue cooed soothingly, opening the box. It was empty and loving arms wrapped about the young girl's body. "I know how it feels. Come get your present." +++ Nothing had become accomplished in the past two hours, in which Scott and Emma argued without even a pause. Sean hardly got a word in edgewise, but he really didn't know what to say. They were like lawyers, Scott and Emma, each trying to give a convincing point to their argument. Sean didn't know what to believe, both of them had pretty good points on their sides. Scott finally gave up, and said he would talk to them in a day or two after speaking with the professor who was away on business in Chicago. They would decide what was going to be done. Emma now sat in her office, staring blankly into space. Sean stood outside her door, trying to think of what to say before he went in. ::If you have something to say, Sean, say it already. Don't just stand there, looking stupid.:: Sean sighed and opened the door, lingering in the threshold. "Rogue is staying. Jean had a hard time fighting off Cail's influence telepathically, and keeping her away from Scott, but Rogue is immune to it." He stared at her for a minute, until she looked up at him. "I understand that Cail means a lot t'ye, Em. She means a lot to me, too..." Emma laughed, the haughtiness leaking into her features. "Oh, yes, Sean! You're such the martyr now! Even though she means -so- much to you, you're going to let her-- let those -X-Freaks- just take her away to examine her as some-- some-- god damnit!" "Ye don't believe it, do ye? Ye don't believe us!" He sighed, turning his back to her in frustration and then turning back, doing a sort of twirl. "She's been manipulating us! We don't know what side up is really up, or down, or left, or right! We dinnae know if the past week has even been real, even a fraction of it! She's -kidnapped- us, Emma, kidnapped our minds and played with us like dolls on strings. How can ye not believe this? How can ye say ye want her to -stay- here?" "I don't have to believe what you say. Furthermore, I don't care what you say. She is -not- leaving this school. Now, if you persist, I can just take her with me, and leave. I could be packed in an hour and be gone. If that's what you want." Sean studied her for a minute. "Ye know that's not what I want. Ye know I--" Emma jumped out of her chair, leaning across the desk, a finger pointing accusingly at him. "If she is what you say she is, then she's not a child at all! Then the joy and the... the happiness that she brings into..." She paused, standing still as a tear rolled down her face. "Then it's all been a hoax. And I can't believe that, Sean. It means everything you said to me was bullshit, it means when I have finally felt like I found my place, all you want to do is move me somewhere else again." It's not the same for you, Sean. You don't spend much time with her, not like me. You don't know what it's like to look forward to every experience she's going to encounter. To listen to her read, to teach her things, to watch her, to make sure she's all right." She sat back down slowly, two fingers resting on her lips to hold in the sobs. "Perhaps it's all been unreal, perhaps it's all been... fabricated. But it's the most real I have ever felt, it is the most... alive, and useful, I have ever felt." "Emma--" She sighed, and looked up at him. "Do whatever the hell you want. Her blood is on your head. I'm not having anymore on mine. I wash my hands clean of this situation. You do what's best for 'us', but I'm not going to have anything to do with it. Not a thing." +++ "Can I take my ants with me?" "Sure can." "When will I be back, Paige?" Paige waited a few beats, before shaking her head. "Ah don't know." She watched the girl quietly, feeling the cloudiness still at the edge of her consciousness. She didn't feel comfortable around this girl. She felt so much better with the idea that she was leaving. "C'mon, kids, it's showtime!" Rogue called from downstairs. She didn't like the idea that Cail was coming with them to Westchester-- she seemed dangerous, from what Sean had said. But she'd been a perfectly normal little girl, from what she'd seen. Then again, Xavier was also doing something to her, something he didn't even speak of with Scott when he planned all this the night before. Cail came bopping down the steps, pig tail swinging. Rogue wondered why Emma would allow them to just have the final say, but she reminded herself again that it was not her place. Sean came up behind her, looking awkward and tired. He flinched as Cail walked by. "Rogue, could ye--?" "Certainly." Then again, maybe it was. "Emma?" Rogue knocked lightly on the door, pushing it open to peer in. "Rogue." "I just came t'tell ya that Cail's gettin' ready t'go." "Thank you, Rogue." She stood there a minute, and Emma looked up at her. "Can I help you with something?" "I assumed you were going to say goodbye t'her." "I said I was going to have no part in this.That is exactly what I mean." "But she's still a little girl in there, who wants her mother. Can't you just even say goodbye?" "I don't need you to tell me what I am. I am not going to come say goodbye. Please. Close the door, and let me be." Rogue left, slamming the door behind her. "She's not comin'," she mumbled under her breath to Sean. She picked Cail up and carried her to the blackbird, Scott not far behind with her bags. The little girl watched the house as she got closer and closer to the jet, and farther and farther away from what she had learned to call home. She seemed to remember something, and then turned to Rogue. "Where's mommy?" She didn't know how to answer. "She's..." Cail had a sinking feeling in her stomach, that perhaps this would be the last time she would ever see home again... and that if she didn't see her mother, even for a moment, something beyond terrible was going to happen. "I'll be good! I never meant to hurt anyone, please! I just... I wanted to belong, that's all, I promise, I promise!" Emma stood by the window in her office, and watched as they put Cail into the jet and the doors closed. Sean looked up at Emma, and shook his head. There was nothing left to say. +++ Upon returning inside, Sean was shocked at what he found when he got to Emma's room. Drawers were pulled from her dresser, emptied of their contents. Her closet was open and empty, and her vanity table also sat empty at the end of the room. He ran downstairs and into the recreational room, where the kids were trying to relax and get their minds back to normal. "Where's Emma?" he asked, hoping they were composed enough to even understand him. The kids looked around at each other, slightly startled by Sean's presence, and finally Monet said, "She's out in the garage loading her car. She said she was leaving, sir." Without anymore questions, Sean went towards the garage at a run. Emma was already done packing most of her bags into the car when he got there. He approached her slowly and asked quietly, "What are ye doing?" "I'm packing. What's does it look like?" "Emma, I want ye t'take yuir stuff back inside right now." "It was nice while it lasted, wasn't it, Sean? To pretend we could all be happy, we could all have what we wanted. It was nice, if only for a little while, to play house. Because that's what it was, Sean, wasn't it? It didn't matter that it's what we wanted, deep down... I am leaving. Tomorrow." She fell gently into his embrace and pulled her arms tightly around him. The tears came for both of them then, and they just held each other that way for a while until she broke away, clearing the salty tears from her cheeks. He wondered if she really meant what she said about still leaving tomorrow and hoped that the kids hadn't seen her like that, but most likely they had, and that was probably the reason for them being silent. He didn't say anything as he walked her to her room. They encountered Jonothon on the way there, but he just seemed to look away. He had been the only one who got the full gest of what was going down here, besides Jubilee, and he said nothing. In fact, for the past few days, he'd been moping out of sight more then usual. He watched Sean and Emma after they had passed him with stone cold eyes, knowing that when the morning came, a lot was going to go down. Jono didn't think Emma was handling this right, but he did see her point. +++ She pinned the letter to the door, and slipped out quietly. Emma wasn't amazed to find that Paige was already up, but to see all the other children sitting in the garage, waiting, threw her for a loop that she wasn't expecting. She didn't say a word to them, but began to load her trunk with her belongings. Paige followed behind her, slowly, and stood next to the open trunk. "Why yuh leavin', Ms. Frost?" Emma sighed. She hadn't been prepared for this, although she should've. She turned slowly and closed the top. Sean stood at the doorway, but didn't look her dead in the eye. "I..." the floor seemed to have caught her interest again, and Jubilee looked at it, too. "Well, I dunno, Frosty. Is it on the floor? Maybe the answer's on the ceiling. Or on my -fucking- shoe. Or maybe there isn't an answer. Maybe it's all just a bunch of bullsh--" Jonothon sent a glare in Jubilee's direction and she hushed. "Children, I want you to know that it's not you. It would never be you. But I am leaving." "Who's going to be our new teacher?" "Well... it's only going to be Mr. Cassidy, I suppose. I can't do anything about it. I'm sorry, children. It's just the way it's going to happen." She turned and looked into Sean's eyes. She left without any more then a goodbye to Sean, leaving behind what she had come to treasure most in her life. The Generation X kids had come to be like her own, but she wasn't going to let them take Cail from her. She was going to get Cail back, no matter what the cost. +++ The melody played again and again in the back of Emma's mind, as if it was implanted there. It was the first song she had taught Cail. It was the -only- song she had taught Cail. She stared out onto the city, knowing she needed sleep, but would not get any tonight. The only thing she could think about was Cail. She felt Sean had somehow betrayed her. He knew how much Cail meant to her. She took a long sigh, and looked at the clock across the room. 3:24. The crazy thing was, that Emma didn't want to leave the school. She loved her students. Even though it had taken her this long to admit it, she loved Sean, too. But it was as if Cail was to thank for it. Emma first kissed Sean because of Cail. And if it wasn't for that one insignificant kiss to break the tension a bit, they would probably both still be struggling to figure out how the other felt. Emma left her balcony, and closed the doors on the city. She sat down on the couch and turned on the tv. Nothing but the news, the depressing news of a depressing world. She turned the tv off, and sat there in the darkness and silence. She called back memories of only weeks ago, some only a few days old. +++ "So what are we going to go after tonight?" "Try to do things together, I suppose. What we've been trying to do all along, but it should be much easier now." "I agree." "...Ye know I love ye." +++ Emma still remembered those words, and thought of how useless they were now. Sean, the man that loved her, maybe the only man that ever truly had, had taken from her the second best thing that made her life worth living again. She took the glass from the table and took a sip. She knew the last thing she needed tonight was alcohol, but she was too tired and too dispirited to even care. +++ "What are all these funny shapes?" "They're called notes, Cail. And they are what you will have to learn to read if you're going to play the piano correctly." "How am I supposed to read those things? I don't even know what they are!" +++ "Mommy? I'm sorry I made you mad." "It's all right, Cail. Just go to sleep now." "Okay. Goodnight, mommy." "Goodnight, Cail." +++ "Just make poptarts, mom! The cinnamon ones!" +++ "I don't know that word." "Sound it out." "Can't you just tell me it?" "What would you learn then?" "You're going to have to tell me it anyway..." +++ Emma sighed and shook her head. No. She didn't want to remember that. She didn't want to remember the scared look on Cail's face as she was carried away, torn away from the happiest life she had ever known. The look in the little girl's eyes still haunted Emma, as if Cail knew some terrible fate that would occur if she did not get one last goodbye. Emma tried to put her mind on other things, but there was not much else to think about. It was late, she was lonely, and she felt empty. The vodka was not helping. It did not fill the void she felt, instead it was reminding her of it, burning the emotions deeper into her heart. She thought for a minute, about the actions she was about to take, and then decided it couldn't hurt. She walked slowly through the halls of the school, quiet and dark. She remembered on some nights when she couldn't sleep, she'd walk down the halls, bringing back old memories of what used to be. Now there were new children, with new lives, and new problems. ::Paige was talking to Sam. He says you're abandoning us. Like you did the Hellions.:: ::I never abandoned them, Jonothon.:: Emma stepped into the room, dimly lit by Jono's psionic flames. ::Do you think I'm abandoning you?:: ::Not abandoning, no. I don't think you're taking this right, but yer not abandoning us. It's not like we really need you. Or you need us. Right?:: Emma sighed. ::I'm not going to answer that. You're trying to play on guilt that isn't there, Jonothon.:: ::If it's not there, then why can't you answer me?:: Smiling a bit, Emma tilted her head to the side, gesturing a point to his end of the argument. ::TouchT. You're a smart young man, Jonothon Starsmore. You've got wit, and a good play on people's emotions. What about your own?:: ::This isn't about me. It's about you, and why you're doing this. Just think about it.:: She nodded and laughed slightly before leaving the room. ::I have.:: Her astral figure walked the campus, slowly examining each and every room she thought might be important. Jubilee was still awake, engulfed in a racing game on her Sega 64. Angelo was awake as well, chatting on the internet. Everyone else was safely in their beds, sleeping soundly. Things seemed to be in order. The kitchen was clean, which made Emma blink. The kitchen had never been clean when she was around. She always found herself nagging for it to be straightened up. She began to leave the premises when she found herself outside of Sean's door. Against her better judgment, she invited herself inside, and walked slowly towards Sean's bedroom. He was asleep, as she had expected. She approached the bed slowly,and kneeled beside his sleeping form. She remembered watching him that night, after he had fallen asleep, and it was almost like now. He looked so peaceful, so happy. As if he wasn't thinking about a thing in the world. He sighed softly in his sleep and before Emma had a chance to realize, he was looking at her. ::I'm not really here.:: *Ye're--* ::In Boston. I was just--:: *Watching me.* {Only for a moment.} *Stop being silly, Em. Come home.* {Why can't Cail come home?} *Ye know good and well why.* {Then you know good and well why I won't.} *This is hard on me, too. I needed ye here tonight, with the children.* {You seem to have done all right without me.} *That's not the point.* {And what is?} "Mainly that I needed ye today, needed ye here with me, and ye weren't here." He shook an accusing finger at her as he sat up in bed. "If ye would stop and think about this, before ye just up and abandon me, you would have been here today. Ye're not thinking about this. Ye're just doing it because ye don't know what else to do. And that's not always the way to solve things. Sometimes ye just have to wait things out." ::I am waiting it out, Sean. I'm just doing it alone.::She followed him into the kitchen, watching his green eyes flickered with anger in the darkness and he turned his back to her, turning on his coffee maker. Emma felt the tears swell in her eyes, and she was back at her room. She tried to hold back the tears, biting her bottom lip so hard that she thought she would draw blood. She didn't want to cry. She was too strong to cry. She was helpless as the first few tears streamed down her face, followed by more. Sean was right. She was going to be lonely, one more night. And she didn't know how to stop it. +++ "Ya look like you could use some company..." Emma looked up to see Jubilee standing there, with a grape soda in her hand, and a pretzel in the other. "Hello, Jubilation. What have you been up to?" Jubilee sat down at the booth, and took in the sights and sounds for a moment. She knew she could do this. She would be fine. "Well, Mr. C's still tryin' t'figure out what he's gonna do all by his lonesome now..." Jubilee took a pause, looking for a reaction but none came. "Sooo... out of the blue sky, he gives us the day off. Y'know, just to think of our futures and all, and for him t'get his head straight and all. Jono and me and Paige were all just taking a drive around and all, and who's car should I see but yours, Ms. Frost! So here I am!" "You drove around?" "Yep." "All the way to Boston?" "Well... yeah." "And you just -happened- to see my car, when I walked here from my hotel room?" "Hey, it looked like your car! I mean, how many white buicks do you see these days, y'know?" "Jubilation, I have a feeling you're lying. In fact, I know it. Does Mr. Cassidy know you're here? Or that Jonothon drove you here?" "Well, technically speaking, yes." "How about if I called him right now?" "That wouldn't be a good idea." "And why not?" "Because... he's... asleep! Yes, he's asleep! And he said he wanted to take the day off today. So we're all trying to give the big lug a break. I mean, why wake him up to come and get me when you could just take me home?" Emma regarded her with a suspicious look. "If this is some crazy plan of yours, Jubilation, I will--" "No plan! Honest! I just thought maybe that you'd be... lonely, I guess. I mean, since you're usually busy with us, and you don't have that responsibility anymore, I just figured you were kind of bored or something. Just thought you'd want to hang or something. But I guess not." Jubilee went to get up, but Emma called her back after a moment. "Changed your mind? Wanna chill, be cool, act like sisters? Hang like Christ, be down with our bad selves, maybe make a little love, get down tonight?" Emma smirked. "Hardly. Where is Jonothon?" "Well, he went home." "And how were you going to get back?" "A cab." "No way in hell am I going to let you wander the city all day, and then go home at God knows what hour of the night. Come along, Jubilation, I'm taking you home." "What?" "I have a meeting to get to in four hours. Let's make this quick, Lee!" +++ "I'M HOME!" Jubilee came bouncing up the steps, running towards Jono's room. "Jubilee! Where have ye been?" Sean came out of no where, stopping Jubilee in her tracks. For half a second, Jubilee looked surprised, but this was exactly what she wanted. "Uh... Hi, Sean! I just... well, that is... Ms.Frost is downstairs! Don't cha know her good heart gave me a ride home, so I didn't have to hitch hike! I'nnat great o' her? Well, why don't you go thank her?" Jubilee nearly pushed Sean down the steps and towards the foyer. She left after she was sure Emma was in Sean's sight, just to make sure she didn't ruin her own plan. She watched for a few moments, watched as they said nothing, only stared, and Emma finally turned and left. She sunk down to her knees in the hallway, sighing softly. +++ Emma opened her eyes slowly that morning, trying to decipher if she was in a dream or were her surroundings real. She stared around at her surroundings, noticing it was a field that she was in. She knew the feeling such surroundings gave-- she was in someone's mind. Looking down at the dry ground, she seen little colored lizards run across what she'd now realized was a desert. Ants were in an abundance along with desert hares. She smiled as she thought back to the time she and Cail had been watching a National Geographic on the desert. She blinked. Cail. She wasn't supposed to be able to get into Cail's mind. She walked slowly through the desert, feeling the heat pierce her skin as she continued for what seemed forever. She finally reached a spot in the desert that was cool and breezy. All of the desert's colorful features-- the lizards, the ants, the cacti, the hares, even the rarely spotted flowers she'd seen-- stopped, and as far as she could see was just dry, flat, motionless sand. She looked around. There had to be an opening out of here somewhere. She seen a glowing red door on a huge cactus and smiled. She opened the door and was sucked inside. She found herself in Cail's room, with Cail sitting on the bed. Her eyes were glowing. She held her breath, hoping this would work. As loud as she could ever remember being, she mentally screamed to Sean for his help. She opened up her mind, if only for a brief moment, to her pain, her joy, her deepest inner thoughts. She showed him her fear, her strengths, her love for him. And maybe in the end that's what got her back into her own body, in her hotel room, in her bed. Some changes had to be made. Someone was attacking Cail, and she was too young to defend herself. She had to get to Cail as soon as possible, or it might be too late. +++ Sean ran down the stairs,opening the door to stare at Emma Grace Frost. "What happened?" they both asked at the same time. "Ye called f'r me help." "I know. It's Cail." "The X-Men?" "I don't know. I woke up in Cail's mind this morning." Emma shook her head distantly, trying to place a thought just out of her reach. "When I was in Cail's mind this morning, someone was attacking her. I know it." There was a flash of light from the doorway, and Emma and Sean found themselves back in the desert. Two forms stood before them, a girl and what looked to be another girl, but her form was unsteady, wavering... as if she was blinking in and out of existence. "Cail?" Sean asked slowly, reaching his hand out to the girl. "It's... you?" ::Don't go, Cail. He doesn't want you to stay.:: Emma watched the terrified little girl, her hand shaking uncontrollably as she reached out her arms. "Give her back. Now, whatever you are." ::Do not go. I saved you.:: "Push her out, Cail. Push -it- out." "It hurts. It hurts so bad, mommy, it's so cold inside. It hurts." "I know. But you must. You must push it away." "I don't know how." "Take my hand." +++ "Do you like him, Cail?" "He's so small. What can I name him?" Emma sighed, fighting back the tears. Beside the two of them, Xavier stood silently. He was content to give them these last few moments. "How about... Red?" "But he's orange." "Well, name him Orange then," Emma smiled, scratching the kitten behind the ears. "No, I'll name him Red, because I like that better." She answered quietly, "Okay." She didn't want to leave now. She'd gotten so much here. She looked at Cail,who now had tears running down her face. "Mommy? Aren't you going to say anything?" "There's nothing left to say, Cail." "All right, I'll... you can go now." Emma nodded, and stood. "I... I love you, Cail. It won't hurt. I promise." +++ The phone rang. Emma let Sean get it as she rested quietly on the grass in front of his cabin where they'd gone to talk. Nearly thirty minutes later, he came out to her, sitting beside her in the grass. "It was Xavier." "Mmm," Emma replied, sniffing softly. "Is she--?" "Yes," he said softly, sitting next to her and hesitantly pulling her into his arms. "I'm sorry, Em. The strain..." Sean looked up into the sky, trying to break down the story for her. "A mutant girl. Not unlike Jono, separated from her body when her and her parents were killed in a car accident just weeks ago. It was right in front of your office in Boston, all over the newspapers... She possessed the body of a younger cousin who was in a coma in the hospital from head injuries inflicted by her own father. Walked right out with the body, no one even noticed." He paused, watching the tears well in her eyes. "She'd only been here two weeks, Emma. With the kids gone for spring break, emotions running high... I suppose we were susceptible. We're lucky the kids got here when they did. And that Cail-- the real Cail-- had the strength to push her out. To stop her from continuing to manipulate us... she was so powerful... To think all that time they were fighting for control... trying to tell us, and we couldn't see." "What was her name? The mutant girl?" Sean looked down. "Zoe." "Zoe," Emma whispered. "Wherever you are now, you're never alone." The wind blew. It said ::I know.:: -END-