The Easter Surprise
Author: Lilithangel
Email:
abchainey@xtra.co.nz
Website:
www.livejournal.com/users/lilithbint
Fandom: BtVS AU
Characters: Spike/William and various fairytale creatures.
Warnings/Rating: NC17 for sex between men and blatant abuse of
fairytales.
Summary: Remember the movie the Santa Clause? This is my Spilliam
Easter
take on it... kind of...
Set in my Doppelganger universe
http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=lilithbint&keyword=Spilliam&filter=all
and written for the darker_spilliam Easter challenge.
* * * * *
Spike woke up with a groan his head even fuzzier than normal. He
couldn't remember exactly what had happened the night before except
that
it had involved a lot of whiskey and William. He put his hand up
to
his head as he carefully sat up only to find something soft in the
way.
"What the hell?" Spike tried to focus on his hand but everything was
white and fuzzy. Then he realised that it wasn't his vision that
was white and fuzzy but in fact it was his hand. He looked down
the
rest of his body and found that he was in fact encased in a furry white
suit, possibly a rabbit suit if the furry ball on his butt was any
clue.
"William, how the hell did you get me into a bunny suit?" Spike prodded
the figure in bed with him.
William grumbled and rolled over to open one blood shot eye to glare at
Spike. Both eyes flew open at the sight of a giant rabbit looming
over him. "Fuck," he scrabbled out of the bed and landed with a
muffled thumb.
Rabbit ears topping what appeared to be Spike's face peered over the
bed
at him. "I thought it was a dream," William said in shock.
"What dream?" Spike demanded hauling William back onto the bed.
"We got drunk at the Bronze, had to sneak out to avoid the slayer and
tripped over some prat in the alley wearing a rabbit suit. I bite
him and you finished him then decided it would be a lark to try on his
suit. There was a basket as well..."
Spike spotted a gaily decorated basket teetering on the old table by
the
fridge. It appeared to have Easter eggs in it. "What sort
of
tosser prances around town in a bunny suit?"
"That's what those demons asked as we were staggering home," William
answered, "I've never seen someone killed with a chocolate egg
before."
"Fuck." Spike tugged at the suit, "get me the hell out of this."
William fought back the giggles and tried to help with little
success. "There doesn't seem to be a zipper or anything," he said
as Spike started to roll around on the bed.
"There has to be a bloody zipper I got into it didn't I?" Spike
flopped onto the bed in disgust. "How am I supposed to show my
face
dressed like this?"
"I think it might not be a suit exactly, anyway I kind of like it,"
William replied with a smirk. He hopped off the bed and headed
for
the basket.
Spike snickered when he saw what was attached to William's rear.
"I
hope you do cause that's a pretty tail you're sporting Peter
Rabbit."
"What?" William twisted around to see the puff of fur apparently
growing
out of his tailbone. "What the hell is going on?" He
grabbed
the basket and returned to the bed where Spike stroked his tail with
interest. "Stop that," William wiggled at the touch.
The two of them investigated the basket which was in fact full of
chocolate eggs. Tied to the handle was a card which Spike pulled
off and read.
"He who wears the suit must deliver the eggs or children everywhere
will
have tears in their eyes. You have got to be bloody kidding,"
Spike
swore tossing the card aside.
"I suspect that getting rid of the suit is conditional on delivering
the
eggs," William said.
"Well sod that," Spike replied, "who's to say that I won't get stuck
with
the job? Besides, it feels kinda nice." Spike stroked down the
sides of his rabbit suit with his furry mittens. William watched
as
the fur at Spike's groin bulged and then Spike's cock pushed out of a
furry sheath.
"Well you know what they say about rabbits," William said bending down
to
lick the underside of Spike's cock.
"What's that?" Spike said with a groan.
"They fuck like, well rabbits," William said with a grin. William
grabbed an egg out of the basket and tore the foil off. He broke
half of the egg off and melted it in his mouth before returning to
Spike's eager cock.
"Fuck," Spike breathed as the warm chocolaty mouth slipped around his
shaft. "Screw the kids this is too good to share."
Two days later.
A deposition of fairytale creatures stood in front of Spike's
crypt. "You knock," the Tooth fairy nudged Mother Goose.
"Why me?" she asked, "The Wolf would be a better choice."
"For crying out loud," Little Red Riding Hood (who bore a striking
resemblance to a certain slayer) said. She stepped forward and
pounded on the door.
When nobody answered she sighed and pushed the door open and led the
way
inside.
Snow White clung onto the Wolf's arm nervously, "I still don't see why
I
had to come," she whispered.
"In case we need to use your feminine wiles on them," Mother Goose
replied moving her feathers away from the dirty floor.
"I still don't see why Santa didn't just come," The gingerbread man
said,
"He's got the real clout."
"I heard that the big guy had a run in with this vampire last Christmas
and didn't want to face him again," Snow White whispered.
"He has to find out who stole his reindeer remember?" Red said.
"Anyway how difficult can it be to convince a vampire to give up a
bunny
suit?" She found the hatch to the lower level and climbed
down.
"Possibly quite hard," the Wolf said shielding Snow White's eyes from
the
debauchery in front of them.
Spike and William sprawled on the bed their bodies covered in chocolate
and blood.
"We'll never get the stains out," Mother Goose said in horror.
"What the fuck are you lot?" Spike said gazing blearily at the group as
William hid his chocolate covered bits from the curious eyes.
"We have been sent to retrieve the suit and basket from you," Mother
Goose said as she was pushed forward by the others.
"But the note said the eggs had to be delivered first," William
said.
"It has been decided that an exception can be made in this case,"
Mother
Goose.
"What if we don't want to?" Spike said.
"You have to," Red said glaring at them threateningly hefting the
Woodsman's axe.
"What is it about blonde bints and weapons?" Spike said, "Fine, if you
know how to get me out of it go for it. Think I've had enough
chocolate for a while anyway."
Mother Goose lifted up a bunny rabbit and placed it on Spike's chest,
"don't eat it," she warned.
Slowly the suit started to fade on Spike's body and the rabbit on
Spike's
chest grew and stretched until it was a human sized bunny with very
dirty
fur and Spike was naked beneath him.
Spike pushed the bunny man off and tossed him the basket that was still
as full of eggs as when they started uncaring of his nakedness.
The female fairytale characters turned their heads away, except for Red
Riding Hood who was watching with far too much interest for William who
pulled a sheet up to cover both of them.
"Thank you for coming now please take your bunny and leave," Spike said
as the bunny started sniffing his leg.
"Thank you for being so cooperative," Mother Goose said as they all
climbed the ladder out of the lair.
"The next time I want to bite somebody in a stupid costume you will
stop
me won't you?" William said to Spike as they tried to remove the
remnants
of the chocolate from their bodies and their bed.
"Okay, except for the fat guy, he's fair game."
END
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