The Fallen
 
Author: lilithangel
 
Email: abchainey@xtra.co.nz
 
Website: www.livejournal.com/users/lilithbint
 
Fandom: AtS set after NFA
 
Genre: Angst
 
Warnings: Slight slash
 
Summary: Was talking with Sassy about obsessive compulsive, decided Angel was a prime candidate and this came to mind for some reason.  Read a novel once with a similar theme.

 
The Fallen
 
"Angel time to eat," Spike's voice barely broke through his concentration.  He couldn't stop now he had to follow the line to the end. 
 
Angel could not turn to look at the blond vampire, he would lose his place and it had taken too long to get here, he had to finish this time something good was at the end he knew, something that would bring them all back.  He just had to follow the line to the end.
 
Angel had been like it since the battle in the alley since the last of their friends and allies had fallen. 
 
Illyria had fractured into little pieces with a blaze of light that had allowed Spike to pull Angel away from the body of his son. 
 
Angel had torn demons apart with his bare hands to reach the boy who had refused to stay out of the battle.  He had broken then rocking the body in his arms paying no attention to the battle that raged around him.
 
It had been left to Spike to pull Angel away and gather up the bodies of the fallen.  Find a place to hide the catatonic Angel and then give the others a decent burial.
 
He had returned with blood to find Angel in the same position he was in now.  On his hands and knees following the pattern on the tattered wallpaper muttering about finding the end.
 
Spike had tried to pull the elder vampire away from the wall but stopped at the frantic wail of distress.
 
Now he would sit and watch until he couldn't take anymore then he would go out to kill things or get drunk and bring back blood to see how far Angel had gone around the room in his absence.
 
Sometimes he would return to find Angel pounding his head against the wall after losing the line or sitting blankly at a corner unsure of where to go next.
 
Then Spike would manage to get some blood into the weakened vampire and even coax him into sleeping for a while.  They would share a bed and for a few brief moments Spike could pretend that everything was alright.
 
Once or twice Angel would turn to face Spike and some level of understanding would shine in his eyes.  They would come together then in a flurry of need and despair tears marking their cheeks even as they spilled their seed.
 
But every time Spike would wake up alone and Angel would be back on his hands and knees following the line around the room.
 
A hundred times he walked to the door ready to leave for good and a hundred times he would stop.
 
They were all that was left, without them nobody would remember the fallen.
 
So Spike continued to watch over Angel and just hoped that there would be something left when he did reach the end.
 
END