Farewells
Author: Lilithangel
Email: abchainey@xtra.co.nz
Website: www.livejournal.com/users/lilithbint
Fandom: Ats/BtVS post NFA
Characters: Spike, Buffy, Willow, Dawn, Connor, Xander
Warnings/Ratings: G, character death.
Summary: set some time after the events of NFA. The Scooby gang come together to say goodbye.
A/N: this isn't very festive but this is all I could write today.
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The church was full of flowers and the scent of jasmine was strong. A small group stood awkwardly in the front pew as the priest spoke of a man with a good heart cut down before his time, and prayed for his soul's safe return to God.
When the priest was finished a woman got up to speak. Her red hair had lightened over the years and was liberally streaked with grey but she still held herself with hard won confidence.
"He was my friend and I loved him," she said simply, "he always tried to be a good man and even when he failed he kept on trying and I admired him for that. I am going to miss him so much." The tears fell unnoticed and a slim woman in her late forties came up to escort her back to her seat.
A dark-haired man stepped up and stared down at the simple oak coffin. He took a deep breath, "we didn't always get on dad but you taught important lessons. I will continue to look after our family dad, I promise. Thank you for giving me the chance to." Placing a sprig of jasmine on the coffin he walked out of the church.
A small blonde woman walked up to the coffin holding a pink rose. "You were my first love and in the end my dearest friend. Even after you received your reward and could have taken a well deserved rest you continued to fight the good fight helping the helpless because it was the right thing to do. Even without the love you were always there for me. You stood by me through everything, were a wonderful uncle and mentor. I will always love you my Angel."
A man with an eye patch came up and stood beside her placing a comforting arm around her shoulders.
"He saved my life," a voice said from behind them, "he didn't know me and he saved my life." A man walked up to the group, "he had no reason to but he did it. He didn't even want me to thank him and he never told me who he was but I found out. I wanted to tell him... but I'll just tell you instead. Thank you." He bowed his head briefly and left as quickly as he had arrived.
"We've picked you out a really nice plot with a view of the park," Willow said to the coffin, "you'll be able to see the sunset every day."
"Thanks for saving everyone," Xander said, "I know I never said it and I'm sorry for that."
Buffy had slipped away from the others, drawn by the faint smell of cigarettes in the vestry. "Spike, is that you?"
The shadowy figure paused and turned to face her. "Hello Buffy," Spike said.
"Why didn't you come inside? He would have liked you to have been there."
"Vampire, remember?" Spike's smile was twisted, "don't really do churches."
"How did you get here?"
"My usual way." He held up a still smoking blanket.
"He talked about you," Buffy began.
"Bet he did," Spike interrupted her.
"He missed you."
"Couldn't do it slayer," Spike said, "he had his reward, his happy ever after. He didn't need a vampire hanging around mucking it up. I saw his face when his heart started beating, saw his eyes looking for where the sun was going to rise. No place for me in that."
"There was always a place in his heart for you Spike," Buffy said, "I didn't believe it myself at first. But it was like when he got his humanity he could say all the things he wanted to say, admit the truth about a lot of things."
Spike shook his head. "Don't tell me that slayer. Don't tell me things would have been different. You know better than anyone that desire he had for a normal life." The vampire's hand was shaking too much to light up another cigarette. He cursed and shoved the lighter back into his coat pocket.
"Come and say hi to everyone," Buffy said, "I know they would like to see you."
"Not a good idea," Spike stepped back into the shadows.
"Dawn's missed you, we've all missed you."
"He gave you the light, you all belong in the light. I don't, not yet."
"Spike, wait." Buffy made as if to move. "He loved you, he always loved you."
"I know he did, it just wasn't enough."
Two weeks later...
"Hey pounce, nice digs they got you." Spike rested his back against the simple stone marker. "Sorry about the funeral thing. I just wasn't ready to say goodbye. I'm still fighting the good fight, okay, keeping the happy meals safe on the streets." He lit up a cigarette and puffed away for a few minutes. "Did you make it Angel did you earn your place in heaven? Will it ever be enough?"
With a soft release of breath Spike stood up and brushed the new grass back into shape over the grave. "I'll come back and visit, tell you what's been going on if that's okay with you. It was always you, you know that don't you?"
Spike raised his hand to his face at the feather light touch on his cheek but when he turned around he was alone, but some how he didn't feel quite so lonely anymore.
END
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