Author: Mera

Feedback: Do I even need to say anything? Do I look like a nut? I'm not one to pass on FB... though I might be one to take it at gun point... lusciousspike@yahoo.com

Rating: 17+ soon

Pairing: Spike/ Angel (eventually), Spike/Raven(OC)

Summary: Spike decided to stay in L.A. and work with Angel and Co. in Wolfram and Hart now known as A.I and Co. However, Angel still has a bit of a grudge towards Spike, for obvious reasons. Spike gets hurt... Angel is responsible in away. How will that work out I wonder?

Notes: this is all happening in S5 AtS, Cordy woke up from her coma and Fred is Fred. W&H is now the Fang Gang's playground so... no Eve yay! You'll figure out the details when you read.

Disclaimer: the chars belong to Joss though I borrowed some... am going to keep them for sometime... give them tea and crumpets... maybe make them show me their sexy dance and if I ever get bored *snort* I'll return them.

Distribution: You want? Just ask, I swear I won't say no!

Thanks and snuggles to mygothangel and lusciousxander for the great fast beta!

Italics & *& capitals = emphasize

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"I'll get it! It must be the room service I ordered."

The door swung open and Xander's eager face appeared. He frowned and called behind his back, "Anyone call an order of non-dusty bottle blond vampire with a soul on the side?"

Spike shook his head. "Cute," he said in a mock tone.

Xander shrugged, telling him to enter the hotel room. He closed the door behind the vampire. "If a handful of rookie slayers and a vampire saviour say so, then it must be true!" He patted his unkempt hair gracefully.

Spike rolled his eyes. Xander Harris might have matured through the years in looks but there were some things that never change. He surveyed the room appraisingly. The new Watchers Council seemed to go all out these days if the luxurious three-bedroom dwelling meant anything. His eyes finally landed on the couch where two young women were waiting for him patiently. Xander cut into his vision as the boy flopped clumsily down onto the couch.

Now three pairs of eyes watched him silently. He shrugged.

"We need to talk."

Willow nodded at his words and indicated to a nearby chair. "So you said the first time. 'A long chat', was it?"

Spike pursed his lips as he was taking a seat but didn't elaborate. He had come here for a reason other than the initial catching up, and he intended to follow through.

"Yeah, Blondie, Cordy choked whenever we asked about you. Care to fill us in?"

Spike looked at Faith not a little surprised. "She kept her yap shut for once?" He shook his head amazed when Xander nodded while stuffing his face with what seemed like sour chips. "Who knew she had it in her."

Faith leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees. "Yeah, Red was checking for demonic possession when Cordelia wouldn't budge. Though she did give us some fab anecdotes of Angel."

Xander snickered evilly around a mouthful of chips. He soon had Willow's hand smacking his back to ease his choking.

Faith continued as if nothing happened, "So, fess up. Coz, man, if it's another one of those 'end of world apocalypses' then I seriously need to buy new jeans before shops close."

*~*~*~*~*~*

"So... what did you have on Gunn?"

Cordelia raised her head, not even bothering to stop polishing her nails, and smiled knowingly. "Him kissing a transvestite well during happy hour."

"Photos?" Angel asked, leaning casually against her closed door as if he hadn't snuck in and was watching her for a while.

She blew on her fingers and held them up to the light. "Video. Clubs have high security these days, you know."

Angel shook his head in amazement. "You really went to the big guns on this one." Cordelia raised an eyebrow. "Take the pun as you like it. Now... tell me why maneuvering me into accepting that invitation is so important to you. Not that you had succeeded, mind you."

"He was killing himself."

Angel opened his mouth. He closed it. He tried once more. "What?"

Cordelia might have seemed busy rearranging her desk, but she answered him, "You think you're so cool for catching onto Gunn's diversion, the all knowing vampire. As if."

Angel was taken back at the cold glare that was shot at him.

"We didn't say anything, because..." She spread her hands. "I dunno. Worried that it'd be like betraying him? We all found out in our own way by accident, so I guess it didn't seem right somehow."

"Cordelia..." he started, only to be cut off. She mumbled what it seemed like to herself, "Like it matters much now." She refocused. "It was barely noticeable at first, at least for me. According to the others, it had been going on way before I came to. I finally took Lorne's Sinatra records hostage until he spit it out."

"What did he see?" Interest might have peeked, but Angel kept to his own pace.

Cordelia shook her head. "Rules of personal reading crap. He just said that Spike was 'forlorn' –his word- needed someone who 'got it'... him-- needed to do good, do something other than baiting you."

Angel blinked as if that wasn't something new, riled or even of concern to him. It wasn't like he needed someone to pass that information along. He knew that Spike hadn't gotten over the guilt that accompanied the soul, regardless of the opinions he had expressed on the subject, mostly right to Spike's face. Others might not see it, but Angel knew of Spike's act. Pulling on a cloak of abrupt unscrupulousness was a quality Spike had devised upon his turning so well that the young vampire fooled even himself. But never Angel.

Angel's cool facade continued as he replied, "So he did good, played my role pretty well a while there."

Cordelia twisted her lips. "Him pulling on the solo hero cape didn't go with his eyes. Or was that his arms? Loony Slayer, anyone?"

"That's part of him being an idiot," Angel answered simply. This was going nowhere. Cordelia and Gunn mentioned things that he already knew, and talking about Spike was something he never liked. Especially if it meant he would have to endure someone's prattling about a matter that was a done deal for all he cared about. It was better off as he had left it. He should tell his 'friends' that. It would hopefully put an end to all of the meddling and get them back to the important businesses of saving people. Then why wasn't he?

Because... there was something his crew had been hiding from him all this time and this probably was his best chance to find out about it all. Cordelia's eyebrow twitched in agreement with the idiot part. "Yeah. But that was Lindsey's work. If we didn't keep him grounded he might have gone out one night without someone to cover his back and get himself killed, for good this time. Me, Fred, Lorne, Wes, even Gunn would drop unexpectedly at his place to make sure he's in one non-dusty piece. Did you know that?"

Angel didn't answer. He was too busy wondering how he had missed that. How he had been slowly cut out of his friends, his crew, his adopted family, who shared something like this between them without including him. He was left out of something that he, of all people, should have known. And maybe that was it. He should have known.

More importantly, Spike shared a weakness with them, if not with deliberation then by allowing it to continue... something he had never let anyone with whom he was less than both physically and emotionally intimate with to see.

Cordelia poignant tone continued flowing as she got up and walked around her desk, "Sometimes we'd find him really roughed up from a fight that he hadn't called in --- it mostly happened after one of your nasty fights. Fred did the statistics." She gestured at Angel meaningfully, jogging his memory of a couple of recent arguments he had with Spike. None of them ended near what could be called a good note.

Angel wondered what had happened to that elevator; it seemed he never used it recently.

"This one time, Fred and me walked in on him trying to patch up BOTH hands... pretty burned up." Her face twisted as if the memory in itself was painful. "Face singed. That was a little after Lindsey got what he deserved and the law firm became putty in well-manicured hands." She wiggled her fingers right at his face. "Fred wasn't all that shocked, so that clued me in on her knowing. She mentioned later that this incident coincided with you lashing out the night before at Spike, saying that 'it was lucky that we survived' seeing that he was 'stupid enough to aid the enemy all this time'. That he 'should've known that 'Doyle' was a fake'."

Cordelia was so close to his face right now, her eyes boring into his as if trying to find reason for it all. "Why did you blow up at him, Angel? You knew he was tricked. If it weren't for the PTB giving me a wake up call, you all would've been." She looked wise beyond her years all of a sudden. "Did you need an out-let with the Senior Partners and Lindsey leaving the building and Spike happened to be the toughest one around ready to take it all, maybe slam you around, too." She looked sad. "That doesn't seem like you. Tell me, Angel. I know about it all, remember..."

Angel remembered. He remembered the deal that was made with the Senior Partners over Connor. He also recalled the second and last transaction where he gave them Lindsey and the Evil Corporation handed over the L.A. branch fully, with no strings attached, to A.I. and Co. and sealed all previous contracts and accounts as well. That insured that Connor's secret was protected – the name of the demon in charge of the spell was given to Angel and he had taken care of that – as well as the different facilities. Also, it included letting Gunn keep what demon and human laws he had not lost upon declining a foggy arrangement – meaning that he was still Super Lawyer but with a few missing holes that old fashioned study and research would take care of. Not to mention, the added bonus of removing what Gunn had referred to as 'Girly-Songs' from his memory.

"Files and Records is a freaky place, you know that?" Cordelia pulled him back from memory lane with them both reclining on the couch in her office taking in the silence.

Why did she have an office if she really wasn't working in the building? Angel had often wondered about that but never dared question Cordelia to her face. "Um, I think I've been there once. The woman with the odd eyes?"

Cordelia nodded. "The one and only. You know she keeps wearing the same outfit? Poor woman," she said pityingly.

Angel didn't know how to reply to that other than to focus on his confusion at her going down there in the first place.

Cordelia seemed to catch on to his befuddlement. "I had to see this Claim deal without the boys looking over my shoulder."

Angel barely hid a groan.

"So, it seems that Spike would be changing his family name..." She looked disappointed. "You had strung Spike along all these years with false hope only to disown him." She poked Angel on his arm. "Why don't I believe that?"

Angel had had enough of all the prying. "Maybe because there isn't anything else to this, anyone ever think that?"

"The look in your eyes wasn't guilt, Angel. It was worry." That seemed to be her closing argument.

She looked really pleased with it.

However, Angel had to ask. For his own sanity at least. "Wha?"

Cordelia's face took on an exasperated quality. "C'mon, Angel. How about you be the bigger man in whatever tiff you and the Peroxide Master have going on, take back your rightful claim." She was actually placating him. Angel could hardly believe it. "It isn't like you hate him that much, splinter fit anyone?"

"I didn't have a fit," Angel snapped. He dug his fingers in his knees. He was again reminded why Cordelia wasn't his favorite person back in Sunnydale, and it had nothing to do with a petite blonde slayer. "He is part of my line and has a soul as you all like to keep reminding me. My blood... I had to . . ."

Cordelia impatiently cut in, "I'll give you the soul bit, but the part of the line is bullish and you know it." Angel was almost shocked at her vulgarity if it weren't for the look on his friend's face, pointedly reminding him of the recent circumstances and his indifferent part in them.

"So mister, I'm giving myself a green light to give you my current opinion of you."

A pointed finger right at his face caused his eyes to momentarily cross.

He blinked.

Angel mouth, currently set in a straight line, opened, clearly intending to tell Cordelia off once and for all. "Now, just a minute..."

Apparently, for Cordelia, a minute was too long, for she went head-on with what she had wanted to say even before Angel finished uttering the last word.

"You disowned him for God's sake! That was harsh. You may not have said the words but your inaction spoke louder than words ever could. That stung me! A partial observer!"

Angel had given up on cutting into her fast spoken words, but he did allow himself a snort at what she described herself as.

"You could've given your permission to the mating---" Angel was sure that Cordelia didn't pause there dreamily, he was confident of that. His shoes were intensely captivating all of a sudden. "--- kept Claim and let Spike stay in the twisted thing you call family. You didn't. You just took a pair of blunt scissors and cut every tie you ever shared with him. Do you know what happens when you cut something with blunt anything?" She waited until Angel raised his head. He then had all but a second to wonder if that was permission for him to speak before she smirked. "Well, I'm sure you do."

Angel blatantly shot her a bored look. He wondered how long she was planning that one. However, it didn't seem like an invitation for him to voice his all but useless opinion at this time, for she continued speaking, "I would be the first to admit that Spike can be infuriating." Cordelia snorted and rolled her eyes at the euphemism. "And I think sometimes even more than when he didn't have a soul!"

Angel couldn't help but raise his eyebrows in concurrence at that fact.

A moment later, Angel was taken aback at a look that befell Cordelia's face. He didn't like that sad and lost expression. He hated how it reminded him of his friend their first year living in Los Angeles. How when she lost her cool façade she ...

It never hit him before how Cordelia reminded him of Spike. He put a halt to those thoughts before they opened a can of worms that aimed to give answers to a lot of questions better left in the past.

"I'll think about it."

Cordelia actually looked startled. So it wasn't an act. Or if it was, she had truly improved in five years.

He repeated, "I'll think about going, Cordy. I think I understand. You're like the mother hen to Spike's yearlong infantile chick; I can't blame you for being pulled into that role. He does personify it better than anyone I know." Angel liked the hard upset look on Cordelia Chase's face more than what was under the mask. It just struck too close to home.

He stood up and rubbed the back of his neck casually. "I really don't know what you think would happen if I went, but I'll do it for your peace of mind at least."

The tall brunet took a few steps towards the door, feeling every imaginable stake thrown at his back.

"Besides, maybe after I sleep on it, those diversionary points Gunn mentioned would make sense." He let out a sound as if he remembered something. "And please don't use my secretary as a spy."

Angel opened the door, and let it close softly behind him. He started walking to his office, ignoring the dumbfounded look on Harmony's face. He meant what he said to Cordelia. He would think about it. But he really didn't want to go. Raven must have sent the card knowing that Angel would not accept it, or that if he had, he would flaunt his claim on Spike to the Underworld... and Angel- even if Lore had yet to be fulfilled. Angel wouldn't be fooled into that position.

Unless...

~ I went in with a plan? ~ He thought as he closed his office door behind him. His personal elevator caught his eye and started up the thoughts once more.

Cordelia's revelation concerning Spike's slow killing of himself shocked him more than he chanced to reveal. He didn't know it was that bad, he honestly thought that Spike was coping better than him. Although with the events prior to reinstating Claim, he couldn't blame him. It figured that the vampire was too proud to ask for help from a veteran. That must have been the only reason, right?

Angel found his feet moving towards the twin metal doors, feeling tired all of a sudden. What did he tell Cordelia? Sleep on it? Yes. He will proceed to sleep on the matter right now.

The answers will come to him in the morning.

*~*~*~*~*~*

TBC