Title:  Acting The Part
Author: Pattyanne
           snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS
characters belong to me.
Feedback: Love some, thanks.
Rating: Up to NC-17
Summary:  AU. William St. James is
an actor in a hit television show. While
appearing at a fan convention, he meets
Buffy and her six year old daughter, Melanie.



Part Sixteen....


The knowledge that, sooner or later, she would have
to get around to discussing Angel had never been far
from Buffy's mind.

Ever since William had made it clear that he had more
than a passing interest in her and Melanie, she'd figured
it was only a matter of finding the right time and place.

She just wasn't sure that this was it.

After sharing such a life altering experience, one that
had left her more than a little dazed, the last person
on earth she wanted to even think about was her
cheating ex-husband.  It felt like a weird sacrilege
to follow the best lovemaking she'd ever been treated to
with such an unpleasant subject.

But William seemed determined to get it out in the
open, so she took a moment to try and collect her
thoughts.

He must have sensed her reluctance to talk about it,
since she was being careful not to let her facial ex-
pression give her away.

"I'm sorry. Am I being too pushy?"

Buffy shook her head. "No, it's not that. I knew we'd
be talking about it...."

"Eventually?"

"I guess."

He was silent for a long moment, then gave her a rather
lopsided smile. "I'd kind of like to get him out of the way
now."

Obviously, he wasn't going to drop the subject.

"Well...Angel and I met in college," she said, reaching for
her robe where it was draped carelessly over an armchair.
"He was..."

"Angel?  Your ex's name is Angel?"

Working her arms into the robe, Buffy smiled at the note of
derision he couldn't disguise. "His mother had this sort of
mixture of flower power and born again christian thing going
on.  He has a younger sister named Heaven."

"Angel and Heaven?  They must have had fun in school."

"Anyway...he was studying law and I was a history major. My
best friend took me to a party at his fraternity, and that's
where I met him.  We started dating, and we got way too
serious, way too fast. I mean, we'd only been going out for
a few weeks before we were talking about getting married."

William watched as she climbed out of bed and crossed the
room. "You must have really loved him, then."

Buffy picked up her brush from the dresser and began to
pull it through her hair, just to give herself something to do
with her hands. "I didn't really know him," she replied, turning
to look at William. "Unfortunately, I didn't realize that until it
was too late.  I was so starry eyed over him that I totally
missed all the little clues that should have warned me about
him."

"And what would those clues have told you?"

Still tugging the brush rhythmically through her hair, she
sat on the end of the bed next to him.

"That he was controlling, and not completely grown up," she
admitted. "That he had a problem committing himself to anything
but his job...and that he probably wouldn't be faithful."

It still hurt to confess that, even to herself.

"He cheated on you?"  William frowned. "He had YOU
to come home to....and that wasn't good enough for him?"

"Oh, not at first he didn't."  She didn't want him to think
that she'd be stupid enough to go through with marrying
a man who was already fooling around before they made it
to the church.  "That came later."

The brush caught on a nasty snarl. She yanked at it
harshly, but before she could tear through it, he took
it out of her hand and worked the tangle gently out of her
hair.

The feel of him brushing her hair, the intimacy of the act,
made her sigh blissfully. This was a man that knew what
he was doing. He never took a wrong step with her.

"Things were good at first. We had a lot in common,
liked doing the same things. Most of our friends were
couples, too, so we went out a lot. Restaurants and
clubs...stuff like that. His parents have a condo in Palm
Desert that they let us use whenever we wanted, so we'd
all go down in a big group for weekends."

Listening intently, William put the brush down and
gathered her hair into three equal portions, then started
braiding them.

"Right after he passed the bar, he was hired by Wolfram
and Hart, this mega-power law firm. That's when it all began
to change. He really wanted to go somewhere with them, as
far as he could, so we had to start socializing with a different
crowd. People at the firm, the senior partners and their
wives. You know...people who could "DO" things for him,
who could open doors. Our old friends just kind of...drifted
away, but he didn't care. Actually, he was kind of happy
about it. He said we really didn't have time for them, any-
way, and they'd just be holding us back."

Almost absentmindedly, he unraveled the braid he'd
formed.

"Just about everyone in our new crowd was older than
us, higher on the social scale...and he wanted to be up
there with them. We started attending art gallery openings
and saw plays that I didn't understand, not because he
really enjoyed it, but because it was a good place for us
to "be seen" by all the right people."

"And you hated it?"

"I went along with it," she sighed. "I wanted to see movies
and  go to football games. Just have fun with people our own
age. But he didn't want that.  I felt so cut off. He didn't want
me to work because people might think that he couldn't
support us.  So, there I was...with nothing much going on for
me outside of making a home. It wasn't too long after that I found
out I was pregnant, and it was a BIG surprise!"

"But a good surprise, yes?"

Buffy nodded. "For me? Yeah. For Angel?  Not so much. I
was on the pill, but it was making me nauseous, so my
doctor had to adjust the dosage. Somehow, during that
time, Melanie was conceived."

Not if she lived to see the dawning of a new ice age
would Buffy ever forget the look on Angel's face when she'd
announced her pregnancy.  His shock and anger had taken
all the magic out of what should have been a beautiful
moment. During the argument that followed, he had even
alluded to the idea that she'd 'allowed' it to happen.

"Let me guess," William said. "He didn't want the baby."

It wasn't a question.

"We had this huge fight. He just kept telling me that it
wasn't the right time for that sort of thing. Not even close. He
wanted to be more established in his career, more successful
at it, and making a lot more money. One thing led to another,
and he finally stormed out with this sort of...backhanded
warning that he wasn't going to let ME be the one to hold
him back just because I'd gone and gotten myself pregnant."

"Got YOURSELF pregnant?" he echoed. "Well, THAT'S quite
an accomplishment."

Buffy picked at a loose thread of her robe. "He never came
out and asked me to do it...but I could tell he wanted me
to..."

"Okay, stop right there!" he said angrily. "I don't even want
to HEAR the rest of that sentence!"

And she didn't want to say it.  It was probably the single most
painful truth of her life; the man her foolish young heart had
chosen as a soul mate hadn't wanted the baby they had created
together, and would have been willing to see it destroyed.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, she pressed on, wanting
this to be over with soon. "After she was born, it just got
worse and worse. I'll admit I was pulling away from him. I just
loved her so much...she was my whole world. Angel couldn't
deal with that. He'd always been the center of my universe,
same as he had been with his parents. He had no interest in
Melanie at all. Sometimes, I think he forgot she was even
there. It got so bad that I was afraid to go to the store unless
I took her with me. I didn't want her to need something and
have him ignore her while she cried."

"Christ," William muttered under his breath. He pulled her
closer and wrapped his arms tightly around her. "That's
enough. I get the picture. I don't want to hear another word
about him."

Buffy pressed herself against his warm, hard body. "Well, now
you know why she said that at school," she said, turning her
head to look at him. "She really loves you, you know?"

He tightened his embrace. "I love her, too."

The tension in her body began to drain away, leaving her
soft and pliable in his arms. "She turned down a trip to Disney-
land in favor of that convention," she told him, lightening the
mood a little. "If that's not love, I don't know what is."

"She did? Wow...I feel so honored," he replied. "I won out over
Mickey Mouse."

Buffy laughed. "It was a birthday she'll never forget, because of
you."

He pulled back in surprise. "It was her birthday?"

"Mm-hmm. Her sixth. I offered to take her to Disneyland or
give her a party, but she chose the convention instead."

"I missed her birthday? Damn it!"

"Well...technically you didn't. You were there."

"Yeah, but I didn't know."

He was really disappointed, and Buffy couldn't help
thinking that, had he been Melanie's father, every one of
her birthdays would have been celebrated in high style. He
certainly wouldn't have skipped her party for a romp in bed
with his latest extra curricular activity.

"Hey, I've got an idea," he said, pulling her out of her
musings. "Let's take her to Disneyland. We'll have an extra
birthday for her, since I missed it. We can spend the weekend
at the hotel and really do it up."

He sounded almost as excited as a child would at the
idea, and his enthusiasm was catching her up in it.

"Oh, she would love that!  Are you sure, though? I mean,
it'll be awfully expensive?"

William just laughed. "Don't worry. I can afford it."

"I KNOW you can afford it. I just meant...."

He cut her off by pushing her flat on the bed and kissing
her until her toes curled.  When he pulled back to smile down
at her, she placed one hand on his cheek. "I wish...."  The
words were out of her mouth before she could stop them, making
her blush at her own boldness.

"What?" he asked. "What do you wish? Tell me, and I'll
make it happen."

"No, it's not that. I was just thinking..."

"Tell me," he insisted.

She took a deep breath and jumped. "I was thinking that...that
YOU should have been her father."

He was silent for a moment, thinking, then he came back with
a comment that nearly made her heart burst out of her chest.

"Buffy....I want to be her father."



TBC.....

(Am I making Angel out to be "too" horrible? I don't
 want to overdo it.)