Title: As You Should Be
Author: Pattyanne
            snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS
characters belong to me
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Once again I have to redo
an episode I didn't care for. This time,
it's 'As You Were'.

AN: Yeah, I monkeyed around with some of
the dialogue. So sue me.

AN #2:  Yes, I'm working on all my WIPs, I
promise. This is just something I whipped up
on the spur of the moment.

**************************************************

The Beginning:


She could feel his eyes on her the moment she
stepped into the yard.

Buffy tightened her grip on the hamburger bag and
tried to summon up the will to tell Spike to go away
and leave her alone, that she was in no mood for
whatever it was he wanted from her, and that she
didn't particularly care if she ever saw him again.

Unfortunately, the moment he stepped into view,
every scrap of that will slipped right through her
fingers.

The same thing happened each and every time she
made the decision to end her mad, self-destructive
behavior once and for all.  She actually spent a lot
of time practicing her 'never darken my doorstep again'
speech in front of a mirror, would memorize it until she
had it dead perfect.

Then, the second she clapped eyes on him, everything
she'd been planning to say would disappear from her
brain faster than an algebraic equation once the test
was over.

"Oh, for Pete's sake," she muttered, attempting to inject
some irritation into her tone. "Spike!"

And there he was, stepping out from around the tree
looking as supremely hot as ever. even with that smart
aleck smirk on his face.

"Well, it's a fair cop," he shrugged. "You caught me,
Slayer. However, in all honesty, I think we'd have to say
this one doesn't count."  He walked slowly towards her,
still smiling. "After all....I wasn't exactly hiding."

Buffy swallowed hard and took a step back, holding
up one hand like a traffic cop. "No, Spike!"

He tilted his head to one side, another gesture she had
difficulty resisting. "No? What kind of an answer is that?
You haven't even heard the question yet."

"I don't have to," she said snippily. "We both know what
you're thinking."  As if SHE wasn't!  God, what a hypo-
crite she was turning into.

As always, he had her number. "And we both know that
I'm not the only one thinking it," he replied, his voice
dropping just a little in register, a sound that produced
goosebumps up and down her spine.

She hadn't even begun to formulate a reply before he
grabbed the front of her coat and pulled her forward,
leaning down to kiss her.

Buffy was all set to give in, when she caught a whiff of
the hamburger she'd brought home for Dawn, a smell
she was heartily sick and tired of.  The scent brought
her back to reality and she smacked his hands away.

"No. Not here."

To her instant consternation, his lips formed an
adorable pout. "Why not?"

Why not, why not, why not....good question.

"Dawn!" she dredged up desperately. "She's inside
waiting for dinner. She's counting on me and I'm not
letting her down by letting you...in."

If he said, 'letting me in where?' she fully  intended to
punch him right in the face.

"So," he mused, "it's the fear of getting caught then, is it?"

That would do!

"Reason number one....on a very long list," she shot
back.

Spike shook his head. "Needn't be an obstacle."

Before she knew what he was planning, he'd taken her
hand and begun pulling her back towards the tree.

Her will power was taking a sound beating. "Spike...I
mean it," she said, trying to sound as though she really
did.

"I hear you're serious."  His eyes moved slowly up and
down her small frame.  "So am I."

Determination was fading fast.  She was actually
allowing herself to be drawn along by him.

"I want you," he murmured, turning her until her back
was against the tree. "And you want me."

Oh, god...she did. She really, really did.  There was no
hope for it.

"I can't go inside."  He leaned down until their lips were
almost touching. "So maybe the time is right for you
to...come...outside."

Well, if there was anyone in the world who could make
THAT happen without half trying, it was him.

Buffy glanced up at the house for a brief moment, then
looked back at Spike.  She was going to do it, was going
to give in and let him....allow him.....permit him to....

**Stop kidding yourself, Summers. You aren't 'allowing'
anything. You want it just as much as he does. Admit it
to yourself...even if you won't admit it to him..**


Pushing all else to the back of her mind, she dropped
the hamburger bag on the ground and twined her arms
around his neck, tugging him down until their lips came
together.

With a soft chuckle that came from deep in his throat,
Spike placed his hands on her waist and leaned against
her, molding his body to hers as they kissed.

Once again, it took him about 2.0 nano-seconds to
completely disarm her defenses.  The instant she felt that
sensual mouth on hers, all the fight drained right out of
her.   The words **Oh, well...** danced briefly through
her reeling head.

His mouth blazed a trail from her lips to her throat. She
was amazingly sensitive there and he knew it, he took
advantage of it every damn time.

Before her brain stopped working completely, she
decided that if she WAS going to let it happen, she
might as well participate in the fun.

She returned every kiss, every touch, matched every
soft sound of pleasure, willing to go the distance...right
up until the moment he began trying to push her coat
down her arms.

"Hey!"  She pulled back a bit. "What, are you crazy or
something?  Stop that right now!"

He frowned, preparing himself for an argument. "Buffy,
you can't stop now. You..."

"Who's stopping?" she asked. "I'm on board with the
not stopping, but there's no WAY you're taking my
clothes off outside."

"Oh," he said after a short pause, then shrugged. "No
problem."

That said, he moved his hands down in front of her
and worked open the fastenings of her pants.  Once he
had them undone, he pushed her sweater up and
twisted the front clasp of her bra, filling his hands
with her breasts.

Her eyes drifted shut as she concentrated on nothing
but his touch.

"Like that...don't you?" he asked softly.

"Uh-huh," she replied without opening her eyes.

He squeezed and fondled her until she was
dizzy with pleasure, cupping the mounds of her
flesh and sweeping his thumbs across her nipples,
making them harden beneath his touch.

"Do you want my mouth here?" he whispered,
giving her an extra firm squeeze.

If he expected a coherent answer, he wasn't
going to get it. All she could do was murmur
some unintelligible consent, pushing herself
into his talented hands.

He lowered his head and took one nipple in
his mouth, suckling it softly, stroking it with his
tongue.

Surprisingly gentle at first, he slowly increased
the pressure, sucking harder and harder.  His
hand mimicked the sensation on her other breast,
pinching and tugging.

Buffy whined in her throat, blindly clutching his
head to keep him where he was, forgetting for a
moment that he was never in a hurry to leave
when he did this to her.

"That's it," he muttered, drawing wet circles
around her nipple before switching sides. "Keep
making that sound, Slayer."

Licking each nipple in turn, he slipped his hand
into the opening of her pants, wedging it between
her thighs.

Buffy sucked in air through clenched teeth,
wriggling until her pants fell down around her
ankles, followed quickly by her panties What he
was doing was pleasing her to no end, but she
wanted more. She kicked the gathered material
off one foot, enabling her to spread her legs apart
and give him better access.

His fingers moved between her legs, rubbing her,
coating them with her moisture.  "Christ, Buffy,"
he muttered, "you're so wet...and hot."  He kept
her in place by sliding his middle finger inside
her, pumping it in and out. "Not to mention...as
tight as a virgin."

Her internal muscles clamped down around his
invading finger.

"There you are," he grinned when she opened her
eyes.  "That's my girl."

Buffy was too far gone to even think of challenging
that statement.  Her nipples were wet and tight from
being in his mouth, and his finger was driving her
slowly insane.  She couldn't hold back the urge to
thrust forward on it.

"Undo my pants," he rasped, taking her hand and
leading it to the bulge in the front of his jeans.

She looked down, thankful to see that he hadn't
worn a belt. Her fingers fumbled briefly, made
clumsy by her lust.  **Open the snap...slide the
zipper down....concentrate, stupid..**


"Take it out."

Buffy looked up into his eyes as she slipped her
hand inside his pants. Taking a firm hold on his
erection, she moved her hand up and down.

He timed the thrusts of his finger with the motions
of her hand, leading them both quickly towards the
edge.

They were far too close, and he ended their hand
maneuverings by pulling away from her and shoving
his jeans down a little more.

When the pleasure his finger was causing ceased
to be, Buffy opened her eyes just in time to see him
lowering his pants. She was about to comment when he
placed his hands on her bare bottom and lifted her, lining
himself up with her entrance without even having to look
or feel for it, and plunging inside of her, burying himself
to the hilt.

This position was quite familiar to her. She still dreamed
about the first time they'd achieved it, in that crumbling
house that night...their first night together.

She was far more adept at it now, knowing enough to
place her hands on his shoulders and use them to help
lower herself down and then raise herself up, sliding up
and down on him with giddy pleasure, slowly at first, then
faster...harder....

He buried his face against the side of her neck, burrowing
under her sweater to taste her bare skin.  His teeth scraped
against her jugular, nipping just hard enough to make her
feel it, careful not to break the skin.

"Come for me, Buffy."  The words were no sooner growled
from his throat than she felt the start of her climax. She wrapped
her arms around his neck with a soft, vibrating sound of need
and desire and purposely tightened her sex around his length.

Spike squeezed her soft bottom, guiding her into an even
more abandoned rhythm. He pulled her away from the tree and
turned, sinking to his knees before falling forward onto her as
he emptied every drop he had to give inside her receptive heat.

She lay in the damp grass, panting and straining for more,
refusing to allow him to withdraw from her, begging him to do
it again...to make her come...make her feel....make her forget.

Helpless to do anything other than what she asked of him, he
delivered splendidly, giving her two more orgasms before he
gave in to his own.

Oddly enough to him, she stayed soft afterwards, allowing him
to hold and kiss her for a while.  This was so different from her
usual post-coital behavior...which normally consisted of her
shoving him off and throwing her clothes back on, all the while
insisting that she'd never allow him to come within shouting
distance of her again before disappearing like her tail was on
fire...that he had to force himself not to brace for rejection.

It wasn't easy, but he managed it, staying close to her and
enjoying her tenderness while he could.  Who knew if it would
ever come again?


***********************************************


The Middle:


"Thanks for letting me tag along."

Buffy forced a smile. "No problem."

She didn't really mean it. This was a huge problem. Riley
back in her life, dragging 'the little woman' along with him.
Not that Sam was little. She was actually sort of big, and a
little on the butch side.  Which didn't matter at all to her.

So why was it such a problem?

Walking along, listening to Sam babble about her and Riley,
how they met, how 'ripped apart' he'd been, tactics, missions,
blah, blah, blah....all of a sudden she knew why.

This was as boring as hell.

It was dragging up all the reasons she'd been tiring of Riley
in the first place. His 'duty', his 'missions', his devotion to 'the
job' over all else.

Who needed this crap?

"Sam, you know what?  I think we should split up."

"Oh, I'm slowing you down. I knew I would. This was selfish of
me."

Buffy sighed. "No....it's just....there's this guy. An informant. But
he's...twitchy. I show up with company and we'll get nothing."

Sam nodded. "Cool. I'm guessing Finn needs me about now. He's
probably off somewhere getting his ass kicked."

The comment made Buffy smile.  It was so close to truth.

"Don't worry about Rye and me," Sam added, backing away.
"We're good."

She turned and walked off. Buffy rolled her eyes. "I noticed."

Now there was only one place she wanted to be. Turning on
one heel, she broke into a trot.

Surprisingly, Spike was sitting on top of a coffin...reading a
book.  She'd never seen him reading before. Not ever.  The
incongruous sight threw her off stride for a moment.

He looked up and smiled, placing the open book face
down and sliding to his feet.

"Buffy. If I'd known you were coming, I'd have baked a cake."

She tugged her gloves off and faced him, speaking as
professionally as she could. "I need information."

Spike tilted his head. "Well....suppose I could be helpful, if
the price is right. I'm not sure I'm selling out at Double Meat
Palace wages, though."

Buffy dropped her gloves on the coffin, ignoring the charm. "I
need to find a guy. A dealer. Calls himself the Doctor."

"Human?"

"His traffic isn't."

"Clock ticking?"

"Whatever he's doing, he's doing it soon."

His eyes moved up and down her body. "Soon...but not
now?"

That look made her shiver all the way to her toes, in a
way she'd never done when Riley had looked at her.

Feeling suddenly playful, she spoke softly. "Tell me you love me."

That surprised the hell out of him!  She usually screamed the
exact opposite at him.

"I love you.  You know I do."

Yes, she did.  She moved a step closer. "Tell me you want me."

He moved nearer as well. "I always want you," he whispered. "In
point of fact...."

"Shh."  She placed one finger against his lips for a moment. "No
talking."  Hooking one arm around the back of his neck, she tugged
him across the room to the marble sarcophagus, pulling him down
with her.

"What the hell are you wearing?" he grumbled, tugging
at the fastening's of her bullet proof vest. "Since when do you get
shot at?"

"It's a long story," she said, unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it
over his shoulders. "Explain later?"

"Promise?"

"Yeah...."

The feverish intensity between them was burning hot, and
full arousal blossomed immediately.  It was strong and immediate,
demanding gratification.

His mouth devoured hers with aggressive and devastating force
as he methodically stripped her of her clothing, tossing it carelessly
to the floor.

She gasped, arching her neck, when he bared her breasts to the
cool air of the crypt.  His hands stroked and fondled her, making
her shiver and moan at his skilled touch.

Breaking their kiss, he lowered his head and closed his mouth
around one taut nipple, licking it with his tongue, biting at it with
his teeth, then sucking strongly.  She felt the sensation, the delicious
pulling, all the way down in her vitals.

Electric shocks ran up and down her spine as he worked over
her, hot ripples that started in her belly and radiated all the way
through her.  She tangled her fingers in his hair, almost dizzy
with need for his touch, letting him do as he pleased with her.

When he had her panting for more, he pulled back and stood
over her, obviously struggling for some degree of control.  Buffy
watched as he undressed,  her eyes gliding over him with sincere
appreciation.

She held out her arms. "Please. Love me now."  It was shameless
begging, but she didn't care. Her skin was tingling, coming alive
with sensations that she hadn't felt for a very long time before
starting this new phase of her life.

Climbing back onto the sarcophagus, he wedged one knee
between hers, spreading her thighs. One hand moved down,
touching and caressing her, making her hot and slick with
moisture he was coaxing from her.

His mouth found hers again, and she clung to the kiss with
an intensity she rarely displayed, drawing his tongue into her
mouth and sucking it hard.  This brought a husky moan from
him and made him bear down harder.

At the same time, he slipped one hand down, spreading
the wetness, rubbing her in just the right way.  She clamped
her thighs shut, grinding herself against his fingers and
increasing the flow.

Air was becoming an issue for her, and she tore her mouth
away from his, whimpering soft words of encouragement.

"Don't stop...oh, god, don't ever stop," she pleaded. "It's...it's
too good...need you....need you...now...."

"You've got me, baby," he murmured into her ear. "You know
I'm all yours."

"Mine....all of you...."

"Mm-hmm....all of me...long as you want it."

Her head was spinning, her only clear thought was, **Who
needs Riley? Let her have him...**

"Let me in, Buffy...ahh...yeah, that's the way."

She locked her gaze with his, wanting to see his face
when he pushed himself inside.  He always looked so
amazed by it all, so surprised to feel his body joining
with hers.

Once he began to thrust, there was no stopping him. He
never held back, never feared that he might be hurting
her.  Spike knew her the way no other man ever had,
knew what she could take and what she wanted.

He propped himself on his forearms, pumping his hips
against her, riding her hard and fast.

Every stroke took her higher, propelling her towards
climax with brutal intensity.  She arched her hips,
taking him even deeper.

Sliding one hand down, Spike took a firm grip on
her rear, lifting her into his thrusts, locking them more
tightly together.  "Someday," he said, "I want to do
this is a bed."

"Okay," was all she could think to say, sinking her
fingers into his biceps and urging him to lie down
on top of her.

He gave her what she wanted, lowering his full
weight.  She wrapped her arms around him and
held on tight.

With his face snugly pressed to the side of her neck,
Spike redoubled his pace, pounding into her as hard
as he could, wanting desperately to take her over the
edge.  "Come for me, Buffy," he rasped, sinking in all
the way and grinding against her before resuming his
untamed thrusting. "Do it, now...oh, god, baby...now...!"

Her release exploded within her as his did, and they
rode out the ecstatic pleasure together, their bodies
straining, internal muscles clenching, creating a com-
bustive heat that flared over them both.

Moments later, he moved off of her and went looking
for a quilt and pillow.  "So," he said, lying next to her
and pulling her close. "You gonna explain the commando
gear now?"

Buffy smiled, her eyes heavy with a sudden need for
sleep. "Later," she murmured, relaxing in his embrace.

Spike didn't press. He just nodded and closed his eyes,
following her into drowsy afterglow.



************************************************



The Ending:


A short time later, they woke together. Neither felt in any
hurry to end things, so they talked for a while, Buffy
explaining the reason behind her commando wear.

Things between them were peaceful and quiet, until the
door was kicked open with a clattering bang.

Disoriented, Buffy raised her head and stared in shock
as Riley strode into the crypt, still decked out in his soldier
suit, a nasty scowl on his face.  She reached for the blanket
immediately, making sure she was covered.

Beside her, Spike chuckled softly. "Well, looky here. I don't
usually use the word 'delicious'....but I've gotta wager this
little tableau must sting a bit, eh?  Me and your former? Must
kill."  He snickered again. "What can I say? Told you...the girl
needs a little monster in her man."

Buffy glared at him. "Oh, shut up," she snapped, then looked
at Riley. "What?"

He ignored the question, still glaring at Spike. "That's not why
I'm here....Doctor."

Shocked for a moment, she looked from Riley to Spike, then
back at Riley.  "Oh, god."

Spike just sighed, reaching over the side of the tomb and
handing Buffy her clothing. "I thought we'd run you out of town,
mate," he said, his tone anything but friendly.  "I mean, last time
I saw you....if memory serves....you were getting the juice sucked
out of you by some undead ladies of questionable reputation."
Climbing down from the tomb, he pulled his jeans on. "Now, be
a good little tin soldier and, uh....."  He made a shooing motion
with his hand.

Riley disregarded it. "Where are they....Doctor?"

Spike zipped his pants. "Where are what, and why do you keep
calling me that?"

"Glad to be back in Sunnydale," Riley replied. "The locals all speak
English and I know who to beat up for information. It all brought me
here."

"Look, crew cut," Spike said, fastening his belt. "She's not your
girl anymore. And if I can speak frankly, she always had a thing
for me....even when she was shagging you."

Riley's lips twisted in a half smile. "Nice. Very distracting."  He
raised his hand, revealing a large gun and moved a little closer. "Now
tell me...before I get unprofessional," he said, pointing the gun at
Spike, "where are the eggs, Spike?"

Spike shook his head. "You're off your nut. It must be those drugs
they were keeping you on. I did warn you."

Riley shrugged. "Okay...we can do this the hard way, or we can
do it the fatal way."

He lashed out with his fist, punching Spike in the face.

That brought Buffy back into the argument. "Quit it, Riley!" she
snapped. "Spike is NOT the Doctor!"

Spike held his ground. "No need to defend me, love."

"Where are the eggs?" Riley asked again.

"There are NO eggs here, you idiot," Spike informed him. "As
usual...you fucked up!"

Riley glared at him. "I'm taking this place apart until I find that
nest."

"Be my guest." Spike swept out one arm, indicating that Riley
could look where he pleased.

Without speaking another word to either Buffy or Spike, Riley
climbed down into the lower chamber.  They could hear him
shoving things around, then a long silence before he re-appeared
up the ladder.

Folding his arms across his chest, Spike returned the other
man's stare. "Satisfied?"  When Riley said nothing, he added, "You
need to be a little more careful who you beat your intel out of. I
don't have a lot of friends in the demon community since I hooked
up with the Slayer.  They're more than happy to try and sell me out
whenever they get the chance. They'll tell you I'm guilty of every
crime ever committed, up to and including the bombing of the World
Trade Center, you stupid prat."

For the first time, Riley looked uncertain, a feeling he quickly
shook off. "I don't believe for an instant that you're not involved
in this somehow," he said.

"Believe what you want," Spike said. "Just leave...now."

Riley inclined his head, just a tiny bit. "Come on, Buffy. I'll take
you home."

The peremptory tone in his voice made her head jerk around. "I
beg your pardon?"

"I'll give you a ride home. Let's go."

"Who asked you to give me a ride anywhere?" she demanded.

Her ex looked at her, surprised. "You....you WANT to stay here?
With HIM?"

The complete shock and amazement on his face irritated her.
"I wouldn't be here in the first place if I didn't want to be," she
informed him. "Where do YOU get off questioning me about it?"

Spike kept his own counsel, his only reaction was a slight
smile.

"You need to go back to your wife, Riley."

That got Spike's attention. "His wife?  Someone actually married
this git?"

"Be quiet!"  Buffy turned back to Riley. "There's nothing here for
you. No demon eggs, no doctors, no nothing. So I can't think of a
reason in the world for you to still be standing here."

"Buffy..." he began.

She cut him off with a sharp motion of her hand. "Don't 'Buffy' me.
We're over, Riley. You moved on and so did I.  I don't need anything
from you, certainly not a ride home. I'll go home when I'M damn
well good and ready to go home. Now...." she waved one hand
towards the door, "...go home."


**********************************************


A Little Bit More:



"Tell me you love me."

"I'm not telling you any such thing!  Stop that!"

"You don't want me to stop, love, and you know it."

"Quit acting so smug. Just because I told Riley to take a
walk, doesn't mean I'm in love with you, you jerk!"

"Oh, harsh words. Cutting me to the quick, here, Slayer."

"You know, I have a stake somewhere in that pile of
clothing, and I'm not afraid to use it."

"So happens I've got one around here, too. Not real, you
know.  Just plastic."

"What? Why?"

"Your ex left it behind after shoving it in my chest last year."

"Okay....spill. What's the story behind that?"

"You don't want to know."

"Yes, I do. Now cough it up, spike!"

"Later, Buffy.  Got other things on my mind at the moment."

"Ohhhh.....stop it.  I...I really mean it...."

"Yeah, I can tell."

"Smart ass vampire."

"I love you, Buffy."

"I know, I know....let's discuss it later."




The End