Title: Spiritgasms
Author: Pattyanne
           snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Not mine
Feedback: Of course
Summary:  Spike is gone from this
world, but hasn't passed on to the
next.  He's offered a chance to return
due to his saving the world. He turns it
down, until he hears Buffy say something
unexpected.


Dedication:  To Cindi, who likes smutty stories
with happy endings as much as I do...




Part Five...


     ~~~~~

"If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her?
Did I try in every way
To show her every day
That she's my only one?

And if my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes..."

     ~~~~~


Buffy lay sprawled out on the bed, a perfect
picture of ravaged sensuality, with touseled
hair and flushed skin wearing only a light sheen
of perspiration.

On her face, was the smile of a woman calming
in the afterglow of a satisfactory romp between the
sheets.

Spike remembered that particular smile quite
well. It was one of his favorites, although she had
many different versions of it.

When she was happy, it showed on her face in a
knock-out smile that made her seem incandes-
cent. Her small teeth showed a dazzling display
of perfect dentition, and her grass green eyes
sparkled with good humor.

The victorious grin she sported after winning a
well fought battle was another one he was quite
fond of.  The fire in her eyes was a dangerous
gleam at those times. With her lips slightly parted
and her cheeks flushed with exertion, his little
warrior princess was a breathtaking sight.

But the smile she was wearing now was the
one that could drive him to his knees. The moist
curve of her lips, along with the sleepy and un-
focused look in her eyes, was a lethal combination
that could make him half mad with the desire
to take her again and again.

It was the memory of that smile that he had
taken with him on the night he had left her to
try and find some remnant of the man he had
once been...the man that she deserved.

He sat down on the bed carefully, then moved
close to her and whispered in her ear. "I love
you, Buffy."

Her head turned, and she seemed to be looking
right at him.  She lifted one hand and reached
out with it, but it moved through him and neither
of them felt her tender touch.

Sighing, he rolled onto his back beside her. "I'm
sorry for what I said...you know...that last time we
were together.  And I'm sorry that I didn't believe you.
I..I just thought you were trying to be..I dunno..kind
to someone who was about to...to die. Permanently."

Buffy sat up and pushed her messy hair out of her
eyes. She turned and stared out the window, listening
to the sound of the surf meeting the shore.

Spike watched her, wondering what she was thinking.

"But, listen baby," he added, sitting up as well. "I'm
coming back to you. You don't have to be sad anymore,
luv. And if you say it...WHEN you say it again...I'll believe
you...and I'll say it back. Swear to God I will."

She shivered slightly, even though it was a warm night.

"I just hope you're glad to see me."  Spike chuckled. "Be-
cause the place I was at...I don't think they'll let me back
in again. Soul or no soul.  I..well I got into a few scrapes
when I was there."  He smiled fondly at the memory. "You
know me, luv. If there's a bit of hell to be raised, I'll raise
it.  Even in Heaven."

Wrapping the top sheet around her, Buffy climbed out
of her bed and moved to the french doors. She threw them
open wide and looked up at the stars.

Spike followed her. "I got so much to tell you, Buffy, about
where I was. F'rinstance...do you know that every one
of those stars up there has a name?  And I don't mean
the names that people gave them. I'm talking about the
names they were given when they were created."

He stepped up directly behind her. "Melisande..she's my
guide. I told you about her, remember?  Anyway, she told
me that no one knows their names..except for the big
noise up there, of course.  The names are all written
down in a book they've got, and every time a new one is born,
they add the name to the book. So, you can imagine how
big the frigging thing is."

Buffy smiled as if she'd heard him.

Spike's voice dropped to a lower register. "I shouldn't
be telling you this," he said, "but I learned a secret
about Heaven. It's..."

"What did I tell you about blabbing secrets? Are you
TRYING to get the rug pulled out from under you?"

Briefly startled at Melisande's voice, he recovered
quickly.  "Sandy?  Give me some good news, luv."

"Well..."

"Did you find Peter?" he asked, stepping out on
the terrace.

"I was just..."

"Is he fixing the portal?"

"I'm trying to ..."

"Tell him to move his bloody arse, will you? Nose
to the grindstone, shoulder to the wheel and all
that."

"If you don't stop interrupting me, I will glue your
mouth shut," she warned. "Now LISTEN to me.
The portal is fixed, but..."

"But, what?"  He scowled fiercely. "But, WHAT?"

"Well, we seem to have...misplaced...the key."

Spike couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You..
you've lost it?  YOU'VE LOST THE FUCKING KEY?"  He
threw his hands up in frustration. "That's just perfect...
just bloody wonderful!  What kind of a fly by night
operation are you running up there?"

"Lower your voice."

"Fuck my voice!  What the hell is wrong with you peo-
ple? What..you can remember the name of every star
in the sky but you can't remember where you left your
keys?"

Melisande waited out his tantrum with surprisingly
good patience.  "You know...you're on very thin ice,
and you're jumping up and down on it."

Spike rolled his eyes. "Fucking story of my fucking
life, Tinkerbell," he growled.

"Yes, I'm aware of that," she replied. "Now go back in
there with your girlfriend. It won't be much longer."

An unseen hand on his back shoved him through
the doors and back into Buffy's bedroom.

She was still standing by the door, still searching
the skies for something.

"Spike," she said softly, instantly riveting his attention
on her. "Are you up there someplace?"

"No, baby...I'm right here. I'm with you."  He stood
close to her and took in the scent of her hair. "Can't
you feel me, luv?  I'm so close, I can feel the warmth
of your body."

He was shocked to see a tear trace slowly down her
cheek. "No, don't cry," he pleaded. "It won't be much
longer now. Sandy promised."

"Spike...if you can hear me," Buffy murmured, wiping
her cheek against the back of her hand. "I want you
to know that I meant what I said. I love you. I've loved
you for so long that I'm not..really sure when it started,
but...but I'd give anything to have another chance to
tell you."

"You'll get that chance, baby," he vowed. "We both will."


     ~~~~~

"Cause I've lost loved ones in my life
 Who never knew how much I loved them
 Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them
Never were revealed

So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance
To tell her how I feel..."

     ~~~~~

She pulled the french doors closed and crawled
back into bed.  The sheet she had draped herself
in fell away, leaving her beautifully naked.

Automatically, as he had done so many times in the
past, he undressed and slipped into bed beside her.

"Lie down on your back, luv."

When she did as he asked, he placed one hand
lightly on her stomach.  He could feel her soft skin
beneath his touch, and he smiled when he heard her
inhale sharply.

Without another thought, he moved his hand up
to her breasts and fondled them, rubbing his thumb
firmly over her hard nipples.

"Oh, God..." he heard her moan. "Spike..."

"Yes, baby. I'm here," he said. "I'm touching you. You
feel it, don't you?"

"Please...oh, please..."

He smiled as she arched her back, seeking a firmer
touch. Slightly amazed that it was actually working, he
tightened his fingers around her soft flesh and squeezed
gently.

"Buffy...I can feel you more and more."  Leaning over,
he slid his tongue around and around her nipples, making
her gasp and pant, and dig her nails into the mattress.

"I've missed the way you taste, luv," he whispered.

Looking up at her, he could see that her eyes were
open and she looked dazed. Closing his mouth around
her nipple, he sucked it firmly.

When he moved one hand down between her thighs,
she opened them without being told to. His fingers
quickly found the place of her greatest sensitivity and
rubbed it.

Buffy's head thrashed on the pillow, as he probed her
deeply, sliding his finger in and out of her. A flow of wet-
ness made his hand slick as he caressed her.

"Spike..." Her voice was frantic. "I need you...I need you.."

Her words unraveled all of his self control. Without
pausing to think, he moved between her splayed legs and
rubbed the head of his cock against her wetness.

When he was settled in the right spot, he began to push
himself inside of her.

"Fuck," he moaned. "It's working...it's bloody working."

He pulled out, careful not to leave her body entirely, then
slid his length back in, groaning at the exquisite sensation
of being inside her again, something he had never expected
to happen.

She drew her knees up until her feet were flat on the
bed. Lifting her hips, she met his thrusts boldly. "More,"
she whimpered. "Harder..."

He obliged her. His body was definitely becoming more
solid with each thrust.

"Buffy," he moaned in her ear. "I love you...I love you."

"S..Spike?"

He opened his eyes and found her staring at him. She
looked confused and he wondered if she could really see
him as well as feel him. "I'm here, luv.  I'm right here."

His hips moved faster, pounding into her like a machine.

"Buffy, Buffy, Buffy," he whispered, over and over again. 
"Yes, baby...that's it...ahh...that's my girl."

The pleasure was unbelievable, and he couldn't help re-
membering the time when their roles had been reversed,
when she had been the unseen one and he had lain on
top of her, thrusting slowly.

He was so involved with what he was doing that he
didn't notice it when Melisande materialized next to
the bed.

"Good news!" she said brightly. "I found the...oh!"  She
whipped around, turning her back on the lovers. "Well,
this is embarrassing," she muttered.

She counted silently to sixty, but there was no sign that
anything was about to end, so she walked out onto the
terrace.

"Umm...I was wondering," she said, looking skyward. "Do
we need to have him come all the way back there for
this?...It just seems like an awful lot of trouble and they're
kind of busy...Yes, Sir..I know he's been a pain in the
neck...Who knows that better than me?...Okay, YOU do,
but...Well, he's tried...I know, but he can't really help
it...Yes, but what real harm did it do?...Besides that, I
mean...I know, but...Yes, that's true, but you don't...I
guess so, but I...Okay, if you won't do it for him, then do
it for her...Well, YOU'RE the one who chose her...Please,
sir...In almost five thousand years, I've never asked you
for anything personal...Thank you...Yes...I'm on my
way..."

She crept quietly back to the door and listened.  It didn't
sound like they were anywhere near done.

"Okay, pal," she said. "It's up to you now. Don't screw it
up...and if you need me, you know where I am."

Smiling, she blew them both a kiss and disappeared.


     ~~~~~

"If tomorrow never comes
 Will she know how much I loved her?
Did I try in every way
 To show her every day
 That she's my only one?

 And if my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes..."

     ~~~~~

He could feel her wrapping her legs around
his waist, sinking her nails into his back.

Propping himself on his forearms, he moved his
hips from side to side, changing the angle of his
penetration and savoring the sound of pleasure she
made.

His head tilted and he closed his eyes tightly, con-
centrating. "Baby...yes...oh, yes...feels so good...so
right...a little harder, honey...that's it...do it...
fuck me, back...yeah...yeah..."

Below him, Buffy pushed her lower body up hard,
wanting him to slam into her with all of his strength.

"I love you," she panted. "Spike...I love you. Oh, God,
I do...I really do...please...please, believe me..."

"I do, baby...I love you, too...I love you...and I'm...
oh, Buffy...I'm gonna come...I'm sorry, it's just...been so
long...I can't...I can't wait anymore...I...oh, fuck...
oh, yeah...can you feel it?...I'm coming in you, baby...
you come, too...please, baby...come with me...I need
it..."

Three more hard thrusts took him over the edge, and
he held tightly to her, bringing her with him.

When it was over, he collapsed in her arms.

"Spike?" she whispered after a moment. "Is this real?"

With a huge effort, he lifted his head and looked into
her eyes.  "Yes," he said. "I think it is."

Although he wasn't sure exactly what had happened,
he was positive that Sandy must have had a hand in
it somewhere.

Buffy placed her hands on either side of his face,
checking for the feel of solid bone and muscle be-
neath her fingertips.

"You're...you're really here? You're back?"  Tears began
to form in her eyes. "How?"

Spike shook his head, unsure of just how he could ex-
plain. "It's...kind of a long story. I..."

But she shook her head. "Never mind," she said, clutch-
ing at him. "I don't care how...as long as you're really
here."

He lowered his head, and their lips met in a sweet,
lingering kiss.

When he pulled back, he smiled at her. "Did that feel
real to you?"

"Yes," she nodded, returning his smile. "Very real."

The tears that had been shining in her eyes were
gone.  There was so much he wanted to say to her, but
the only thing of any real importance was very simply
put. "I love you, Buffy."

"I love you, too," she said, leaning hard on the words. 
"I really do!"

"I know you do, baby." He sighed and hugged her. "I
know you do."


     ~~~~~

"So tell that someone that you love
 Just what you're thinking of
 If tomorrow never comes..."

     ~~~~~



ONE YEAR LATER...


"It was a nice wedding, wasn't it?"

Melisande removed her hat and tossed it onto a
chair, then looked up and smiled.

"Thank you for seeing me so quickly. I know how busy
things are."  She took a deep breath. "I wanted to ask
you a favor...Yes, it's about him again...I know, but
he's been doing so well...I know you did, and I'm sure
they appreciated the warm weather...Outdoor weddings
can be tricky this time of year...Yes, all the extra star-
light was lovely...the full moon was a bit of a shock...
yes, but twice in one month?...They're going nuts down there
trying to figure it out...I don't know if...Oh, yes, sorry.
I don't mean to stall...Yes, sir...Do you think a small
miracle could be arranged?...Well, it's like this..."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

EIGHT WEEKS LATER...


Spike looked at Buffy, then down at the piece
of plastic in his hand, then back at Buffy, grinning
from ear to ear.

"Pregnant?!"




~~~The End~~