Nanny Spike and Aunt Buffy
Megan/Peta (megpf@netspace.net.au)
    Chapter Nineteen


They didn't match. Whatever the venue, they would always look out of place together. Whether nursing a mug of coffee or a shot of spirits, lager of choice, it would always look comical to the observer.

Giles recognised this and cringed. It wasn't something he'd ever thought of before, never having been out in a social situation with the souled vampire anytime that he could remember. But here he was, chased out of his own bloody flat by his slayer and her apparent vampire lover while they effectively mauled each other at every possible opportunity. Now stuck nursing a cup of some infernal American concoction of coffee when he'd much rather his rum flavoured tea in his own home.

Giles sighed and then looked hard at his companion. Suddenly the implications hit him and he choked on his coffee.

"Er, right. Have an explanation, do you?" He tried not to look at the other too closely, deftly avoiding the vampire's eyes as he glanced around at the other inhabitants of the shop.

"Yeah, actually, think I do. Firstly, Buffy had huge...I mean, she seems to have grown...that is—"

"Yes, Buffy would appear to be lactating. But how is that possible?" Giles was still refusing eye contact, studying his coffee cup intently as if it had the power to unravel the mystery.

"Lactating. And then there's the..." Angel was quite seriously at a loss for words. When Giles had rocked up on his doorstep asking for help and information, he never thought it would be possible to find his reunion with Buffy beginning with a very plain view of her being humped by one of the most evil vampires—aside from Angelus—that Angel had ever known. Almost sheepish, Angel ducked his own eyes and admitted internally that Spike wasn't quite that, but he was without doubt the most irritating, and now he seemed to have Angel's girl. Fury began to well up, and then the situation reasserted itself in his attention and he sucked in a deep, almost soothing gasp of air. Things had progressed and it was just too late. He'd seen the marks, saw the way Buffy had been reacting to Spike. Whatever Angel had had with the Slayer had died a very sudden death with whatever situation had progressed in Giles' absence.

"Would you be referring to the rather blatant lack of respect for my property with the..." Giles waved his hand around in agitation, searching for the right word. "Sex."

The word seemed to surge through the coffee shop like a bomb blast. The reactions were devastating and Giles buried his even closer to the table. He felt shamed and tried to pretend that he would never see any of these people again, nor would he ever be seen in public with Angel again for as long as he breathed.

"Um, yeah. Kinda seemed as if they were acting like they were newly mated." As creaturey of the night as Angel was, he nearly jumped out of his skin as a jet of hot coffee came spewing at his perfectly styled hair. He jumped to his feet and thanked vamp speed for getting him out of the line of fire. Cordelia would have a fit if he came home looking like a hobo. Or even smelling like one.

The chair was ruined. Angel eyed it warily, almost as if he could still get splattered with it if he took his eyes off it for too long. Carefully choosing a chair right next to Giles, he sat and then wondered why the other man was looking almost scared as he abruptly shifted his own chair back a bit.

"M-mated you say," Giles confirmed, his face suddenly draining of all colour.

"Yeah, and the lactating and the togetherness...I'm guessing the baby picked them as parents. Your Slayer is a mom. Congratulations, pappa Watcher." With an uncharacteristic grin, Angel started tapping his fingers on the formica in front of him and waited for Giles to gain some momentum.

"Oh dear Lord."

"Another thing," Angel decided to add. "I wouldn't attempt to spend too much time around a newly mated couple, or you're likely to see a hell of a lot more than what we did earlier."

"Oh good God."

And Giles's head finally made it the final distance and banged hard onto the table.


~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Buffy and Spike sat staring at the little bundle of satisfied baby, intent and serious as they contemplated their behaviour of late.

"Do you—" began Buffy, biting her lip nervously as she refused to look away from the baby. The last thing she needed right now were Spike's hypnotic blue eyes convincing her to lay Lia down to play while they conducted themselves in another act of passion. "Do you think we might be...I mean, maybe..."

"Corruptin' the bit?" Spike interrupted, nodding sagely while he traced a finger down the plump little cheek. His daughter was getting paler. He could see the lighter colour of her skin and her hair was now a dark brown rather than black, but still curly, and still with the gorgeous blue eyes.

"Oh no, you really think so?" Buffy was watching him now, her bottom lip wobbling at the thought that her efforts at being a responsible, mature mother might be a little off.

"Nope. Bettin' you don't remember a thing of when you were the same age. 'Sides, in't natural? I'd think after normal parents find themselves with a new one in the home, quiet, personal moments would be few and far between."

He seemed to pause in thought, then looked back at Buffy with his usual leer strongly in place while he peered at her sparsely covered breasts. "An' I'm thinkin' whatever high horse seeing us in the buff knocked Angelus off, has got to be worth it. Trust me, Lia will agree when she's old enough. If she was suitably scarred by us, an' needs some kind of explanation of course. Otherwise, I don't see any need to alter the way of things."

Again he paused, a sense of apprehension settling between his eyes by way of a wrinkle. "Unless you're not happy with things, that is."

Buffy was shocked at the short episodes of insecurity that Spike occasionally revealed. It was too cute, that little boy look of worry. She just loved him, and was beyond happy with the arrangement as it stood. And very strangely, all that angst that had been preoccupying her life before Lia landed on their doorstep, all that love that Buffy had resolutely hung onto with a deathgrip, seemed to have evaporated on seeing Angel in the doorway. If she hadn't been sure before, she was beyond so now. Spike was her mate, Lia was their child, and she so had to get a degree and work out how they were going to support themselves. But for now...

"Oh, I'm happy. I'm huge with the happy." And she giggled as Spike's whole countenance changed. Master vamp with an inferiority complex one second to sexy vamp with a cocky grin and a raised eyebrow the next. It made Buffy's eyes sparkle and her body tingle.

Spike eyed her up and down, using looks rather than words to inspire that flush of heat that took over all Buffy's rational thought.

"So, pet. When the two gramps get back, you wanna take Lia out for a little fresh night air? We could pass by somewhere and pick up those earplugs Anya warned us about."

Buffy's eyes went huge. "Oh God, yes. We can't have Lia getting scared and making your head explode. I am way too young to take on the responsibility of single-parenting on my own. You are so not going to dust on me, Mister." And she pouted.

Spike contemplated taking his baby and depositing her somewhere safe before he took to ravishing Buffy once again, and then the earlier conversation kicked in and he shook himself of all carnal thoughts. Well, some at least. The others would just have to wait.

"I suggest we get all prepared with baby bags and such. Can't think the little voyeurs will be gone for long. Can you imagine those two out on a date together?" They caught each other's eyes and shuddered at the thought.