Title:       Two Lost Souls Searching For A Way Out
Author:      Sandy
Email:       sp23twop@yahoo.com
Rating:      R  Darn that Spike and his language
Disclaimer:  Joss is a bastard, but he's the one that owns Spike
Feedback:    Sure.  I'm up for it.

Well, at least there wasn't any pain he consoled himself.  It
was...nice, pleasant, calm.

He was bored.

Who would have thought that heaven, well he supposed it was heaven,
would be so boring.  Shouldn't he feel, he didn't know, at one with
the universe?

Or at least happy?

Not that he was unhappy.  He was just...bored.

Nothing ever happened here.  No celestial sing-alongs; no guiding and
protecting loved ones left behind; no peeks into the Akashic
records.  Nothing but long hours of perfect peace.

Long, boring hours of perfect peace.

He wanted out of here.

Perhaps it was his longing for escape from this plane of perfect
peace that let him to her.  She certainly wasn't the usual spirit one
ran into here.  She wasn't at perfect peace.  She was pissed off.

"Cordy?" he thought at her.

"Yeah.  Who're you," she thought-snapped back.

"It's Spike, Cordelia.  You remember me?"

"Spike?  Spike from Sunnydale?  Evil, vampire Spike?" came the
aggressive thought back at him.

"Well, yeah.  Although I'm not evil anymore.  Probably not a vampire
either since I don't have a body and don't crave blood."

"When did you become not-evil?" she thought-asked.

"Oh, about a year ago.  Went off and got myself a soul.  Saved the
world and prevented the First Evil from unleashing an unstoppable
army of Ubervamps on the world.  'Course I sacrificed myself to do
it."

"No kidding?  Wow.  I just ascended.  Didn't save the world or
anything."

"You just ascended?  You mean corporeally?"

"Well, yeah.  But you know, now that I think about it, it was really
strange.  I was on my way to meet Angel to tell him that I loved him,
and..."

"Wait a minute.  You love Angel?"

"Uh, I think so.  Anyway, I was on my way to tell him and then,
everything just stopped.  I mean everything.  Traffic, time, my
biological clock.  Everything.  Then this demon Skip..."

"Skip?  You know a demon named Skip?  Man, and I thought Clem was a
weird name for a demon."

"Do you mind not interrupting?  Anyway, this demon Skip told me I
could choose to be a Higher Being.  Well who wouldn't choose to be a
Higher Being?  So I ascended."

"Huh.  So, what's it like being a Higher Being?  I mean I'm obviously
not a Higher Being, because I'm bored shitless.  What's it like for
you?"

Pause

Sigh

"I'm bored shitless."

"No kidding?  D'ya think there's a way we can bust outta here?
Actually do something that's fun and important?"

"You want to bust out?"  The thought was hopeful, interested.

"The truth?  Yeah.  Like I said, bored."

"You have any ideas how we could to it?"

"Well, you have your body so you could probably..."

"Uh, no, I don't"

"I thought you said you ascended corporeally."

"I did, but, um, I seem to have lost my body."

"Cordy, how the fuck can you lose your body?"

"I don't know!  One minute I had it and the next I didn't.  And
nobody will tell me where it is."

"Well, we'll just have to find it.  I bet once we do, you'll be able
to return to Earth with no problem."

"Okay, we find my body.  Good.  Now, what about you."

"Well, that'll be a little harder, Love.  See I kinda dissolved
before I made it up here."

"Dissolved?  Ew."

"Didn't hurt.  Felt good; like I was well, uh, climaxing...if you
know what I mean."

"Men!  It's always about the sex."

"Hey!  Not so.  I haven't had sex in over a year, I'll have you
know.  Celibate as a monk, is what I am."

"Oh, poor you."

"No need to be snarky, love.  You hook up with Angel, you'll be
celibate a helluva lot longer than me, I'll guaranteed you that."

"Shut up, Spike."

Pause

"So, you wanna try to bust out?"

"I sure do."

"Okay, let's do it."

"Okay."

The End