Subject: [SpikesSalvation] Ficlet During the Battle 1/1 Date: Sun, 22 Aug 2004 07:19:49 -0000 From: "sunnyd_lite7" Title: During the Battle Author: SunnyD_lite Spoilers: Not Fade Away AtS 5.22 Disclaimers: All the following characters are owned by various corporate entities, none of which are me. Joss said we could play with them! Oh, first line lifted from the final episode. One line straight from Monty Python. Rest is from MY quirky brain. A/N: written for Summer of Spike - snarky Spike Posted at the Gutter and BALF as well. Summary: What, you thought Spike would let ANGEL have the last word? "Well, personally, I kind of want to slay the dragon." "Sorry mate, gonna have to disagree with you there. Dragon's mine." "Spike, can we talk about this AFTER defeating the demon horde?" "Nope, calling the dragon, piss off and deal with the army. YOU'RE not qualified to kill the dragon." Angel put his sword, point down, on the ground and stared at the blond vampire in amazement. "It's not like the front seat and calling shot gun, you can't just call the dragon. And why aren't I qualified? I've been the Powers' Champion for years before you turned 'good'." Spike's reply to that charge was a simplistic, "Duck". Angel, not quite sure why, did, as Spike's axe swung through the space where his neck had been and decapitated a grey and scalely demon. "Because, you tosser, it's a dragon and my middle name is George, so sod off and let me kill it. Oi! Mind the demon guts there." "William George? And you call me a ponce?" Despite the battle raging around them, Angel's incredulity was clear. Assessing the situation, Angel had now turned his attention to the critters crawling towards him, hacking and slashing like a Cuisinart on 'chop'. "And just because you're a George, doesn't give you dragon rights," he continued. "Hmm...just because MY parents believed in christening me with more than one name, LIAM, doesn't make me a ponce- they just wanted me to have a decent monogram." While disclosing this information, Spike was having a fine rough and tumble with a group of reptilian demons, obviously the inspiration for the creature from the black lagoon, which had tried to circle him. He broke off his tirade to sing,"Oh, I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay," as he turned the demons into so much kindling. Continuing in lecture mode, Spike began to pontificate, "You're big on the mythos; therefore Liam from IRELAND isn't the one to kill the dragon, George from ENGLAND will – don't you know your bleeding saints? You were so big on the nuns." Not dropping his concentration from the next wave of attack, Angel protested, "Hey that was..." "Pre-soul, yada yada yada." Spike rolled his eyes and then blurted out, "time for Saint Petersburg, mate." Angel felt the look of confusion crossing his face until he saw Spike's hand reaching for his. "Oh, yeah." They each leapt to the sides of the alley, pulling the garrote tight as three demons ran through where they had been arguing. "That's one way to lose your head." Spike quipped. "And you would know," muttered Angel. "Anyway, I was named for Royalty, good Queen Vicky's get. Lucky too, could have ended up Arthur Leopold, or worse 'Bertie', but me mum went with the princes' middle names; more English, she thought." "Spike, you do realize we're in the middle of a battle, don't you? More fighting, less talking." "Haven't you read the fitness magazines? You should be able to carry on a conversation while you work out. Or are you out of shape since you've been fighting more paper tigers than demons this last year?" Angel just knew that the patented Spike smirk was being employed. He never understood how Spike could keep so current on everything, though to be fair, he had a shorter period to be up-to-date on. It was all Angel could do to keep aware of the changing technology. He hated the cell phone the team insisted he carry, the buttons were too small and he never knew half the features. While they were winnowing the numbers down, neither had noticed that Illyria had fulfilled her wish 'to do more violence' and, with her head cocked in that strange birdlike way of hers, she was staring at the dragon; which had been hovering overhead. Illyria gave a piercing whistle, causing the crew to drop, covering their ears in pain. The dragon stared back at the Ancient and roared. She whistled again, almost a wolf-call. The dragon dropped into an empty-ish space in the alley, squashing a few demons beneath its haunches. "It has good lines and flies well. I will keep it as a pet. Its name is Leopold." The imposing bulk of the dragon had blocked further attacks for the moment. This gave the crew a chance to catch their breath. A stunned silence lasted only a moment before Spike smirked at Angel and said, "See that, mate, takes a DRAGON to replace me as a pet."