Replacement by sus

Author: sus
Summary: They were meant to be. The council thought they knew better than The Powers, as well as her friends. An enemy from the future changes the past.
Author's Note:
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Violence, Adult Language, Sexual Situations


Chapter 31: Replacement

Spike couldn’t understand what he was laying on, and over him was something soft. He wriggled with his toes. He was laying in a bed with silk sheets or something like it, it felt good, but he knew there were no silk sheets in the factory.

Spike stopped moving and kept his eyes closed. He had to find out where he was. He knew he was in a nice bed, could feel the wrapping around his torso. Somebody had taken care of him, then it couldn’t be Dru. Spike had always taken care of Dru, but never the other way around. There was a warmth to one of his hands. The one that wasn’t on his stomach.

Suddenly, his eyes popped up. He remembered, Buffy Summers had come for him. She had fed him during the night. He listened. Two heartbeats, one close by and one in another room. He looked to his hand, wanting to know why it felt warm.

He gawked in surprise. Buffy Summers alias the former slayer was sitting on the floor by the bed, his hand in hers and on top was her head resting. She was sound asleep, trusting him not to harm her or who else was in the house with them.

Complete trust, he had never had that. His eyes shined, from the suppressed tears. In that moment, he promised he never would harm her or hers.

Spike knew he was on the verge of falling in love with her, before Angel lost his soul. Now he was so close to falling for her, he could fall head first over the cliff. Just one kind gesture, and he would jump into it. It was wrong, he knew it, but he was the outsider, he never followed the stream.

Slowly, he raised his other hand. It hurt like hell and brought tears to his eyes. But he did it, he touched a strand of golden hair. Twisted it around his fingers. He couldn’t help admiring the softness of her hair. He kept on twisting the strand of gold until the sandman caught up with him.

Buffy tried to stretch her stiff body, stopped when she felt the tugging on her hair. She smiled blissfully at the sight of Spike’s fingers entwined with her hair. Carefully, not wanting to wake him, she lifted his hand and removed her hair, before she placed a kiss on his palm.

What she didn’t know was that Spike had been awake when she had stirred. There had not been enough time to get his hand untangled from her hair. He just hoped she wouldn’t stake him for touching her, maybe thinking he did it in his sleep.

When the door fell close behind her, tears were leaking from under his eyelashes, he couldn’t hold them in any longer. No one besides his mother had ever given him such a tender touch. He fell asleep with that memory forever anchored in his heart, dreaming of what he thought was impossible, but what Buffy was hoping for.

Hours later he woke up to an empty room, he looked around it, there wasn’t much to see. To his right was a fireplace. On the upper site wall from where he was, he saw two doors, that was all there was. The place smelled faintly of paint, he then remembered Summers telling him, he was safe in her home.

The door to the left opened slowly. Spike pulled the cover up over his chest, looked suspicious to the door, ready to jump up at any sign of danger.

Buffy slowly pushed the door open, with a mug in her hand. "You're awake! How do you feel?"

"I..I’m feeling better." It wasn’t normal for Spike to feel shy, but something about this girl brought that side out in him. "Thank you."

She handed him the mug with a big smile. "I hope it’s warm enough, I had to answer the phone, Merrick is in the shower."

"Oh, I’m sure it'll be okay." His smile faded as he bent his head over the mug. Of course she isn’t free, she has a living in boyfriend, should have known. "It’s perfect. Thank you."

Buffy could see the change come over him, the fading smile and the slumping of his shoulders. She wondered what had happened, had she already done or said something wrong? She wanted to get out of there, so she could hide and cry her eyes out. "I’ll get Merrick to look in on you. I have things to do."

"It’s okay. You don’t have to bother your boyfriend. I’ll get out of your hair as soon as it's dark, Dru can take care of me."

Buffy saw a dejected look in his eyes, in the short flash, she saw of his eyes, when he glanced at her. "Boyfriend?" She looked confused at him. "I don’t have a boyfriend."

His head jumped up as attached on a spring. "But that guy you talked about?"

"Not my boyfriend, but a very close friend." Buffy looked down, thought about how much she should tell him. The decision was easy, she couldn’t lie to him. "The Powers knew he was their only chance. The only one sent as an ambassador from The Powers I would listen to, and would let try to convince me to go back." She tugged her shoulders, looked down, in a sudden fit of shyness.

Spike cleared his throat to draw her attention to him. "Is it Angelus you have to take care of, in the staking way," Spike asked when she looked up.

"He is taken care of," she said with a smile.

The smile Spike had just sent her faded again. "Dru?"

Buffy took his hand as she hurried to reassure him. "She is okay. She’s alive and Angel has his soul, this time there isn’t anything that can take it away." Buffy’s thumbs were moving up and down his skin. She didn’t seem to notice but Spike did.

"There is a letter from Dru,. Whenever you are strong enough to read it, it’s on the table." She nodded to the small table beside the bed.

Spike looked to the table but didn’t reach for it, he enjoyed Buffy’s touch. "How did you get a letter from Dru?" he asked instead.

"She was outside some time before dawn."

"It’s strange, I have never gotten a letter from Dru before," Spike mused.

Buffy smiled softly. "Do you need anything?"

"No thanks, luv, I’m good." He removed his hand from hers with a wishful look, and reached for the letter. "Arrgg." Spike immediately let his arm fall down, it hurt like hell to move his body.

Buffy’s hands were on him, helping him lean back in the bed. "Can I check your wounds?" Buffy asked with trembling lips. Her eyes were locked at a spot on his chest, where blood had soaked through his bandage.

He gave his permission with a nod.

"I’ll go get the bandages Merrick has brought today. I’ll be right back." She left the room in a hurry.

"Here we go." Buffy was back with a bag from a pharmacy. "Can you sit up on your own? If not, I can get Merrick to help."

"Let's try," Spike said moaning as he attempted to sit up too fast.

Buffy was at his side helping him up. With one hand, she supported Spike, with the other she emptied the bag out on the bed.

Unwrapping was easy until she came to the last layer, it stuck to the wounds. Some of them started to bleed again. "Here, hold this." Buffy had placed Spike’s own hand on top of a bundle of the old wrapping, to press against a chest wound that had started to bleed again. "I’ll be right back." When she came back, she had a big piece of gauze in her hand. She cleaned the wounds as much as she could without hurting him.

She placed the gauze over the bleeding wound, his hand over it. She had glanced at his face, she could see the strain on it. As fast as possible she wrapped him up, and helped him lay down again.

"You should get some rest," Buffy suggested, watching his tired face.

Spike opened his eyes. "What about you, luv? You can’t have gotten much sleep."

"I haven’t had the time to buy more than two beds." Buffy hid her eyes, biting her bottom lip, a slight flush on her cheeks.

"You're saying that I have taken your bed." Spike gaped at her.

"Sort of. I haven’t had the chance to sleep in it yet," she admitted. "If you don’t mind? It should be big enough for the both of us." Her flush got brighter.

He tilted his head and nodded while his tongue moved over his teeth. "It’s big enough for the both of us."

"Maybe you want to read this while I shower." Buffy handed the letter towards him that she had taken from the table.

"Thank you," Spike had tears in his eyes from gratitude, nobody had been this nice to him, since he was human.

Buffy closed the door to the bathroom as spike tore the envelope open.

Dressed in a red pajamas Buffy entered the room, fresh from the shower, nervous as hell. She dared a look at Spike before she got under the covers. He looked as if he was sleeping after a good cry.

Buffy lay down on the edge of the bed. She was tempted to move closer to Spike, but she doubted he would appreciate her touch right now, after a farewell letter from Dru. She would love to know what Dru had written in her letter to him.

His eyes were red and a bit swollen. They had been together over a hundred years, and she had left town without him, of course he was sad. She wished they knew each other better, so she could have comforted him. The only thing she could do right now was to give him space, and hope everything would turn out all right.

Spike was laying on his back, which gave Buffy a good view of his face. She fell asleep with her hands under her chin, face turned to Spike.

Spike had felt Buffy’s eyes on him, since she lay down. He had pretended to sleep, the questions she could have asked about Dru’s letter, he wasn’t up to them. He just hoped she brought his ruse, and had forgotten the letter by tomorrow or was polite enough not to ask about it, but that might be too much to hope for. She was young and young people were curious.

Dru had left town, left him. It was final, they were over, just like that. What now? What to do with his unlife?

Spike knew he had to find a purpose with his existence. He turned his head, studied Buffy intensely. She was cute with her golden hair and her bubblegum mouth, unconsciously he licked his lips. She was so young, too young for him.

He turned his head to look at the ceiling, groaning at the sight of the tenting cover. Good thing she was asleep, it was not something such a young girl needed to be presented with, it was enough that Angelus was running after her, she didn’t need him on top of that.

He sighed, he had no idea what to do now, where to go when he was healed enough to be on his own. What he wanted, was to stay right where he was, in this bed but with a warm body snuggled up to him. Actually it was the only thing, he could see in his future.

Spike fell asleep with dreams of a future with Buffy and him together, living in her house. Fighting together and holding the hell mouth closed. Living of bagged blood wasn’t so bad if it was human, and the right temperature as he had discovered since he woke up here.

Only a dream, an impossible dream but a nice one, Spike thought.